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With Thanksgiving approaching, gratitude is on all of our minds. You may feel grateful for visiting family, for a cozy fire to sit by, or for your mom’s famous stuffing hot out of the oven. And, of course, we all feel extra thankful for our little ones this time of year.


While all it takes is a cheesy commercial to make me tear up with gratitude for my family this time of year, it can be harder to teach gratitude to children.

Try these 11 tips to help your child feel more thankful during the holidays, and all year long:

1. Share your appreciation

One of the best ways we can encourage gratitude in our children is to model a grateful disposition ourselves. Try to talk regularly about what you’re grateful for and why.

It can help to use certain aspects of daily life as a prompt. Try asking everyone to share something they’re grateful for while driving to school in the morning or while eating dinner as a family. Linking a gratitude practice to a daily activity will help ensure the habit doesn’t slip away after Thanksgiving.

2. Volunteer

Even very young children can help the community in one way or another. Helping others takes away the emphasis on material things and reminds us to be grateful for all that we have.

Little ones can make paintings for children’s hospitals, choose holiday gifts for children in need, volunteer in nursing homes, or help bake muffins to bring to a neighbor.

Try to make volunteering, even in a very small way, a regular tradition to foster gratitude all year long.

3. Involve him in household work

Part of feeling gratitude is being aware of the effort someone else went through to give us something. Involve your child in family tasks so that he can see this effort.

For example, if you feel like your child is ungrateful for the meals you cook him, involve him in the process. Let him see the time it takes to cook for the family so he understands that the food doesn’t just magically appear on his plate. He still may not like everything he’s served, but he will begin to appreciate the effort.

4. Let her earn something

It can be hard for children to understand why they can’t have everything they want in the toy store. Money is a relatively abstract concept and if they’ve never paid for something, they may not understand why you’re saying “no.”

Next time your child really wants a new toy, help her brainstorm a way to earn the money and buy it herself. This could be through saving up her allowance, doing extra chores at home or for Grandma, or having a lemonade stand or a garage sale to sell her old toys. She will see the time and effort it takes to get that new toy, and she will appreciate it more than if you’d simply bought it for her.

5. Set expectations

If a child frequently gets a treat or a new toy when you’re running errands, he will come to expect it. Once he expects it, he will no longer feel grateful for it, he will only feel resentful when you do say no.

Before you go into a store, tell your child the plan. You might say, “We’re not buying any new toys today, we’re just looking. If you see something you really like, I’ll write it down so I remember it next time you have a birthday.” Stick to the plan you set and, with time, the expectation for constant new toys will diminish.

6. Play ‘Pollyanna’

It’s easy to be grateful when everything is going well, but having gratitude during tough times can be, well, tough. Help children practice gratitude even when things are not going their way—help them find the silver lining.

This doesn’t mean they should mask their feelings—it’s okay to feel hurt and upset and disappointed. But it’s not useful to wallow in these feelings for too long.

For example, if your daughter comes home from school upset that her best friend wouldn’t play with her, acknowledge that something hurtful happened, and then help her find something to be grateful about. You might say, “That must have hurt your feelings. I’m so grateful you have other friends like Billy and Sally that you love to play with too.”

7. Give experiences

Having too much stuff can hinder children’s development of gratitude. If they have hundreds of toys, they may barely notice receiving fifteen new ones over the holidays.

Try replacing some material gifts with experiences like a zoo membership or a special one on one date with mom to the park. Experiences help build connection and take the emphasis off of wanting things.

8. Make a gratitude list

Along with his list for Santa, ask your child to make a list of all of the things from the last year that he’s grateful for. You can help him get started, and help write down his answers if he’s too young to write.

9. Be aware of ads

Being exposed to constant advertisements breeds feelings of desire for new things, rather than gratitude for what we already have. Be conscious of the marketing campaigns your child may be exposed to through screen time or catalogs laying around the house.

10. Create a gratitude jar

Start a gratitude jar, where everyone in the family writes down things he’s grateful for and puts them in the jar.

Periodically announce to your child that you’re going to add something to the jar. You could say something like, “I’m so grateful that Grandma brought us flowers from her garden. I feel happy every time I see them. I’m going to add that to the jar.” Your child will start to look for things to add too.

You can make reading the slips of paper together a weekly ritual, perhaps after dinner on Sunday.

11. Say “thank you” like you mean it

Teaching children to say “thank you” is often unrelated to gratitude. It is more of a social custom we are trying to instill. Saying thanks can be heartfelt and meaningful though.

Try adding to your “thank you” to show your sincerity and help a child see what it means to really be thankful. You might say to your spouse, “Thank you for cooking dinner tonight. I was so tired and it made me feel so good when you took care of us like that.” Or, say to your child, “Thank you for helping your little sister button her coat. My hands were full with the groceries and I appreciate you being a helper.”

The more gratitude you show, the more your child will adopt the attitude himself. Try to be patient though. Young children are so focused on themselves that it can take time for them learn gratitude.

Just know that you’re giving them a gift when you make it part of your family life, during the holiday season and throughout the whole year.

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Summer heat has a way of making the house feel smaller, more congested, with less room for the air to circulate. And there's nothing like the heat to make me want to strip down, cool off and lighten my load. So, motivation in three digits, now that school is back in, it's time to do a purge.

Forget the spring clean—who has time for that? Those last few months of the school year are busier than the first. And summer's warm weather entices our family outdoors on the weekends, which doesn't leave much time for re-organizing.

So, I seize the opportunity when my kids are back in school to enter my zone.

I love throwing open every closet and cupboard door, pulling out anything and everything that doesn't fit our bodies or our lives. Each joyless item purged peels off another oppressive layer of "not me" or "not us."

Stuff can obscure what really makes us feel light, capable and competent.

Stuff can stem the flow of what makes our lives work.

With my kids back in school, I am energized, motivated by the thought that I have the space to be in my head with no interruptions. No refereeing. No snacks. No naps… I am tossing. I am folding. I am stacking. I am organizing. I don't worry about having to stop. The neat-freak in me is having a field day.

Passing bedroom doors, ajar and flashing their naughty bits of chaos at me, it's more than I can handle in terms of temptation. I have to be careful, though, because I can get on a roll. Taking to my kids' rooms I tread carefully, always aware that what I think is junk can actually be their treasure.

But I usually have a good sense for what has been abandoned or invisible in plain sight for the lack of movement or the accumulation of dust. Anything that fits the description gets relegated to a box in the garage where it is on standby—in case its absence is noticed and a meltdown has ensued. Crisis averted. Either way, it's a victory.

Oh, it's quiet. So, so quiet. And I can think it all through…

Do we really need all this stuff?

Will my son really notice if I toss all this stuff?

Will my daughter be heartbroken if I donate all this stuff?

Will I really miss this dress I wore three years ago that barely fit my waist then and had me holding in my tummy all night, and that I for sure cannot zip today?

Can we live without it all? All. This. Stuff?

The fall purge always gets me wondering, where in the world does all this stuff come from? So with the beginning of the school year upon us, I vow to create a new mindset to evaluate everything that enters my home from now on, so that there will be so much less stuff.

I vow to really think about objects before they enter my home…

…to evaluate what is really useful,

...to consider when it would be useful,

...to imagine where it would be useful,

...to remember why it may be useful,

…to decide how to use it in more than one way,

... so that all this stuff won't get in the way of what really matters—time and attention for my kids and our lives as a new year reveals more layers of the real stuff—what my kids are made of.

Bring it on.

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In the moments after we give birth, we desperately want to hear our baby cry. In the middle of the night a few months later it's no longer exactly music to our ears, but those cries aren't just telling us that baby needs a night feeding: They're also giving us a hint at what our children may sound like as kindergarteners, and adults.

New research published in the journal Biology Letters suggests the pitch of a 4-month-old's cry predicts the pitch they'll use to ask for more cookies at age five and maybe even later on as adults.

The study saw 2 to 5-month olds recorded while crying. Five years later, the researchers hit record again and chatted with the now speaking children. Their findings, combined with previous work on the subject, suggest it's possible to figure out what a baby's voice will sound like later in life, and that the pitch of our adult voices may be traceable back to the time we spend in utero. Further studies are needed, but scientists are very interested in how factors before birth can impact decades later.

"In utero, you have a lot of different things that can alter and impact your life — not only as a baby, but also at an adult stage," one of the authors of the study, Nicolas Mathevon, told the New York Times.

The New York Times also spoke with Carolyn Hodges, an assistant professor of anthropology at Boston University who was not involved in the study. According to Hodges, while voice pitch may not seem like a big deal, it impacts how we perceive people in very real ways.

Voice pitch is a factor in how attractive we think people are, how trustworthy. But why we find certain pitches more or less appealing isn't known. "There aren't many studies that address these questions, so that makes this research especially intriguing," Hodges said, adding that it "suggests that individual differences in voice pitch may have their origins very, very early in development."

So the pitch of that midnight cry may have been determined months ago, and it may determine part of your child's future, too. There are still so many things we don't know, but as parents we do know one thing: Our babies cries (as much as we don't want to hear them all the time) really are something special.

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For many years, Serena Williams seemed as perfect as a person could be. But now, Serena is a mom. She's imperfect and she's being honest about that and we're so grateful.

On the cover of TIME, Williams owns her imperfection, and in doing so, she gives mothers around the world permission to be as real as she is being.

"Nothing about me right now is perfect," she told TIME. "But I'm perfectly Serena."

The interview sheds light on Williams' recovery from her traumatic birth experience, and how her mental health has been impacted by the challenges she's faced in going from a medical emergency to new motherhood and back to the tennis court all within one year.

"Some days, I cry. I'm really sad. I've had meltdowns. It's been a really tough 11 months," she said.

It would have been easy for Williams to keep her struggles to herself over the last year. She didn't have to tell the world about her life-threatening birth experience, her decision to stop breastfeeding, her maternal mental health, how she missed her daughter's first steps, or any of it. But she did share these experiences, and in doing so she started incredibly powerful conversations on a national stage.

After Serena lost at Wimbledon this summer, she told the mothers watching around the world that she was playing for them. "And I tried," she said through tears. "I look forward to continuing to be back out here and doing what I do best."

In the TIME cover story, what happened before that match, where Williams lost to Angelique Kerber was revealed. TIME reports that Williams checked her phone about 10 minutes before the match, and learned, via Instagram, that the man convicted of fatally shooting her sister Yetunde Price, in 2003 is out on parole.

"I couldn't shake it out of my mind," Serena says. "It was hard because all I think about is her kids," she says. She was playing for all the mothers out there, but she had a specific mother on her mind during that historic match.

Williams' performance at Wimbledon wasn't perfect, and neither is she, as she clearly states on the cover of time. But motherhood isn't perfect either. It's okay to admit that. Thanks, Serena, for showing us how.

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There are some mornings where I wake up and I'm ready for the day. My alarm goes off and I pop out of bed and hum along as I make breakfast before my son wakes up. But then there are days where I just want 10 more minutes to sleep in. Or breakfast feels impossible to make because all our time has run out. Or I just feel overwhelmed and unprepared.

Those are the mornings I stare at the fridge and think, Can someone else just make breakfast, please?

Enter: make-ahead breakfasts. We spoke to the geniuses at Pinterest and they shared their top 10 pins all around this beautiful, planned-ahead treat. Here they are.

(You're welcome, future self.)

1. Make-ahead breakfast enchiladas

www.pinterest.com

Created by Bellyful

I'd make these for dinner, too.

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