7 things mamas who have experienced miscarriage want you to know

3. Miscarriages may be hidden, but many mothers feel forever changed

7 things mamas who have experienced miscarriage want you to know

Miscarriage is a scary word. A word nobody wants to hear. But a word that millions of women each year experience.

During Pregnancy and Infant Loss and Awareness week, we're listening to the stories of women who have experienced miscarriage, and sharing their heartbreak, wisdom, and experience. "Too many families grieve in silence," the organization behind the awareness campaign notes. We're honored to help tell some of those stories. You are not alone.

Thousands of women have shared their own miscarriage stories over social media in recent years, finally giving voice to an experience too often hushed and hidden behind closed doors. We've collected insights and reflection from women who have experienced miscarriage.

Here's seven things they want you to know:

1. Though uncommon after the first trimester, miscarriage can happen to anyone. You are not alone.

2. There are no words that can make it better—but women who have experienced miscarriage or infant loss still cherish your compassionate support, presence and love.

3. Many miscarriages may be hidden, but mothers feel forever changed.

October is Pregnancy and Infant loss awareness month. I am 1 of 4 women who have experienced a miscarriage and I am sharing our story. While it is said that miscarriage is very common, knowing about it and experiencing it for your self are two entirely different things. It's often a topic that is not discussed. So I am sharing our story in hopes that maybe it can help someone else going through a similar situation. On this day five years ago we found out our baby no longer had a heart beat as we were about to transition into the second trimester. I had already been blessed to experience a full term pregnancy prior to this with my oldest child so I had no idea what loss really felt like until this day. While we never met our baby I will always remember our baby. I will always be sad for our loss but grateful for what it taught me about the true nature of pregnancy and the miracle it is to bring a life into this world. We were blessed with two babies since then and I know that this was how our journey was supposed to go but while time has passed I will always honor the little life we lost and what could have been. To all the families who have experienced infant and pregnancy loss I send you hugs and prayers for a peaceful heart. #craftingcrossfitmom#miscarriage#miscarriageawareness
A photo posted by Meaghan (@craftingcrossfitmom) on

4. Faith, hope, or trust in a higher power can help some women heal.

5. They want their little ones to be remembered.

6. More women (and men) are sharing their stories through social media.

December 21, 2011: I met and said goodbye to my first baby, Hazel. I didn't know she was a girl until later, but when we met her, the name just fit. We held her and cried over her that day. We even got her tiny little prints and took photos of her. **she was perfect in every way, how could something so beautiful leave this world?** I found out she passed on a week before and I was inconsolable. I felt empty, alone, out of my mind. I was heartbroken in the simplest terms. �Would I ever have a healthy baby?� It took me a very long time to emotionally recover, but the ability to meet her gave me closure and for that I'm so thankful. � I had anxiety during my following pregnancies. I felt unattached, guarded, paranoid. It only came full circle when Violet was born, and she was healthy, beautiful. It broke my heart again to think that Hazel might have been a little like her. Today, it's been 4 years since I was pregnant with Hazel. Pregnancy loss is unexplainable. Once you go through it, you're never the same. I am thankful for my two beautiful children I have, not a day goes by without being reminded how lucky I am. � October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Pregnancy loss affects 1 in 4 women. I wanted to share my story to help others experiencing a loss to know you're not alone, and you will get through this and grow from it.
A photo posted by Christa + #violetandvale (@christajanel) on

7. There are many supportive communities and programs that want to help, including October 15th's wave of light.

The Love Elijah Project: A post office box set up for mothers and fathers who have lost their babies or children to miscarriages, abortion, still birth, sids, or any other tragic event. Here you can send any memories, regrets, artwork, postcards, letters, birthday cards, ANYTHING to honor your babies and children. love,elijah 14900 e. Orange lake blvd Kissimmee fl 34747 #209 (this is a locked p.o. box that only one person has access to) You can mail in complete confidence that your mail will be kept confidential unless you would like to share. If you chose to share, please include the hash tag #loveelijah somewhere on your package and it will be shared on instagram on our love, Elijah page to help encourage mothers and fathers to talk about the loss of their children. #loveelijah #imissyouelijah #iloveyou #infantloss #infantlossawareness #infantlossawarenessmonth #abortion #sids #miscarriages #sidsawareness #sidsawarenessmonth #miscarriageawareness #stillbirth #stillborn #eptopicpregnancy #childless #sunflowersmakemethinkofyou #captureyourgrief #whathealsyou
A photo posted by kelly airhart (@iamkindblog) on

As much as I love fall, it always feels like the season when my family's routine gets kicked into overdrive. With our oldest in (homeschool) kindergarten, my youngest on the brink of entering her twos, work, housework and *all the things* filling my day, it's hard not to feel a little overwhelmed sometimes. Did I mention we're still in a pandemic? (Yeah, it's a lot.) And while I try to take a positive view as much as I can, now more than ever I definitely jump at the chance to take anything off my busy plate.

One thing first in line at the chopping block? Cooking. To be fair, I like cooking. I cooked most of our meals long before I had ever even heard of social distancing. But there's something about the pandemic that suddenly made cooking every single meal feel exponentially more draining.

Enter Daily Harvest. They deliver nourishing, delicious food right to your door. Daily Harvest's mix of smoothies, bowls, flatbreads, snacks and more provide a balanced, whole food options that are as satisfying as they are nutritious. But my favorite part? When we're ready to eat, I simply pull the food from the freezer and it's ready in minutes—without any chopping, measuring or searching for a recipe. Even better, they're incredibly tasty, meaning I'm not struggling to get my girls to dig in. Not cooking has never felt so good.

Here are my 8 favorite products that are helping to lighten my load right now:

Mulberry + Dragonfruit Oat Bowl

Mulberry + Dragonfruit Oat Bowl

One thing that actually helps break up the monotony of quarantine? Trying and introducing new ingredients to my family. I love this overnight oat bowl (add milk the night before and let it set in your fridge overnight—easy-peasy!) because not only does it not compromise on nutrition, but it also helps me bring new whole fruits, vegetables and superfoods to the table with ease.

Mint + Cacao Smoothie

Mint + Cacao Smoothie

I kid you not, these taste exactly like a mint chocolate chip milkshake. (Just ask my 4-year-old, who is constantly stealing sips from my glass.) What she doesn't know? She's actually getting organic banana, spinach and chlorella with every sip. #momwin

Kabocha + Sage Flatbread

Kabocha + Sage Flatbread

Our family's eating habits have been leaning more plant-forward this year, which often means a lot of veggie washing, peeling and chopping every time I cook. That's why these flatbreads are my new best friend come lunchtime. This Kabocha + Sage Flatbread is made with a gluten-free cauliflower crust topped with kabocha squash, fennel and sage for a taste of fall in every bite. (Missing the cheese? You can add it before baking for more of a pizza feel.)

Kale + Sweet Potato Flatbread

Kale + Sweet Potato Flatbread

There's something about the combination of sweet potato crust topped with red cabbage, organic greens and an herby-cilantro sauce that is so delicious… like surprisingly delicious. I polished off this bad boy in seconds! And unlike other "veggie" crusts I've tried, these are actually clean (AKA no fillers, preservations, partially-hydrogenated oil or artificial anything). Plus, it couldn't be easier to throw in the oven between conference calls and homeschool lessons.

Cacao + Avocado Smoothie

Cacao + Avocado Smoothie

Any time I get to serve a breakfast that tastes like chocolate, it's a good day. (That goes double when it's *my* breakfast.) This rich, chocolatey smoothie is packed with organic zucchini, avocado, pumpkin seeds and pea protein for a nourishing mix of healthy fats and muscle-building protein so I can carry that baby all day long. And did I mention the chocolate?

Vanilla Bean + Apple Chia Bowl

Vanilla Bean + Apple Chia Bowl

Maybe it's just me, but after a long week of cooking, the last thing I want to do on Saturday morning is...wake up and cook. That's why these one-step breakfasts are saving my weekend. I simply add our favorite milk the night before and store the bowl in the fridge overnight. Come morning, I have a nutritious chia bowl that powers me through even the busiest day of errands. It's also Instagram-ready, which makes me feel like I'm out brunching (even if I can't remember the last time I was in a restaurant).

Cacao Nib + Vanilla Bites

Cacao Nib + Vanilla Bites

My kids have turned into snack monsters during quarantine, and I'm often struggling to find a wholesome option (that doesn't require a lot of extra cooking or else I resort to something ultra-refined and shelf-stable). These bites are the hero I never knew I needed. For one, they taste like cookie dough, but they're actually packed with chickpeas, pumpkin, dates and flax seed (among other whole ingredients). But unlike actual cookie dough, I don't have to go anywhere near my mixer to whip them up—all I have to do is pull the container out of the freezer, let them defrost a bit and we can all enjoy a treat.

Cauliflower Rice + Pesto Harvest Bowl

Cauliflower Rice + Pesto Harvest Bowl

Sometimes I have a little more time to cook, but I still want a quick, stress-free solution. (Especially because it always feels like I just cleaned up from the last meal.) I love these Harvest Bowls because they warm up in under five minutes on the stove top (or microwave!) but pack tons of flavor. The Cauliflower Rice + Pesto bowl is one of my favorites, with basil, olive oil and nutritional yeast for a hearty dish reminiscent of a mouth-watering Italian meal. When I'm feeling extra fancy, I add leftover grilled chicken or a fried egg.

Strawberry + Rich, Rippled Berry Compote Scoops

Strawberry + Rich, Rippled Berry Compote Scoops

Who doesn't want to end the day with a little something sweet? This creamy and decadent frozen treat from Daily Harvest is swirled with sweet berries and tropical dragonfruit for an antioxidant burst you'll feel good about—but that your kiddos will just think is ice cream. Go ahead, take credit for being the best mom ever.

Want to try it yourself? You can get $25 off your first box of Daily Harvest with code MOTHERLY.

This article was sponsored by Daily Harvest. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas

Our Partners

There is rightfully a lot of emphasis on preparing for the arrival of a new baby. The clothes! The nursery furniture! The gear! But, the thing about a baby registry is, well, your kids will keep on growing. Before you know it, they'll have new needs—and you'll probably have to foot the bill for the products yourself.

Thankfully, you don't have to break the bank when shopping for toddler products. Here are our favorite high-quality, budget-friendly finds to help with everything from meal time to bath time for the toddler set.

Comforts Fruit Crisps Variety Pack

Comforts fruit snacks

If there is one thing to know about toddlers, it is this: They love snacks. Keeping a variety on hand is easy when the pack already comes that way! Plus, we sure do appreciate that freeze-dried fruit is a healthier alternative to fruit snacks.

Comforts Electrolyte Drink

Comforts electrolyte drink

Between running (or toddling!) around all day and potentially developing a pickier palate, many toddlers can use a bit of extra help with replenishing their electrolytes—especially after they've experienced a tummy bug. We suggest keeping an electrolyte drink on hand.

Comforts Training Pants

Comforts training pants

When the time comes to start potty training, it sure helps to have some training pants on hand. If they didn't make it to the potty in time, these can help them learn their body's cues.

Comforts Nite Pants

comforts nite pants

Even when your toddler gets the hang of using the toilet during the day, nighttime training typically takes several months longer than day-time training. In the meantime, nite pants will still help them feel like the growing, big kid they are.

Comforts Baby Lotion

comforts baby lotion

Running, jumping, playing in sand, splashing in water—the daily life of a toddler can definitely irritate their skin! Help put a protective barrier between their delicate skin and the things they come into contact with every day with nourishing lotion.

Another great tip? Shopping the Comforts line on to find premium baby products for a fraction of competitors' prices—and follow along on social media to see product releases and news at @comfortsforbaby.

This article was sponsored by The Kroger Co. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

Our Partners

A few years ago, while my wife's baby bump got bigger and my daddy reading list grew longer, I felt cautiously optimistic that this parenthood thing would, somehow, suddenly click one day. The baby would come, instincts would kick in, and the transition from established couple to a new family would be tiring but not baffling.

Boy was I wrong.

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