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60+ mamas tell us the *one* thing they wish they had known about newborns

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We have nine months to prepare as we watch our belly grow and feel kicks and movements. But somehow, when babies arrive, we can feel totally clueless (at least the first time around) about the little things newborns do. Maybe you've been around enough babies to know what is coming, or maybe you are changing a diaper for the first time in your life and have no idea where the velcro straps go. We've been there.

We asked #TeamMotherly to share what were the things they didn't know about newborns they wished someone had told them, and we received more than 2,000 responses. Here are some of them:

1. "How your birth plan and postpartum might not be the Disney Fairytale that society makes it out to be, and that it's okay to have all the emotions. There will be people who make you feel bad if you express anything other than 100% happiness." —Lindy A.

2. "That the work is endless, and that sometimes it might take a while for your partner to 'get it' and share the load almost equally, but it'll be amazing when she or he does, and it'll be amazing to see them be as close to the baby as you are." — Michali K.

3. "They gag on mucus right after birth and they pause in between breaths, both of which are terrifying. 😩" —Christen A.

4. "The first night home is the worst." —Kentuckysunshine

5. "Take lots and lots of pictures of yourself with the baby! You'll have 100 photos of baby and dad but not with yourself!!" - Kiran Z.

6. "That it is okay to bottle feed. My oldest was intolerant and had to be switched from breastfeeding to expensive formula at 5 weeks old. I felt like somehow I failed even though he cried hours less and finally gained weight."—FredaMae C.

7. "Anxiety! They said to look out for depression but anxiety was never discussed. I was blindsided."—Ann Ross E.

8. "You will think your newborn is adorable and only gets cuter... But when you look back on those candid newborn photos you will see what everyone else saw, a wrinkly pink alien baby 😂" —Farren R.

9. "That it's okay to have an 'easy' baby! Not every baby is super fussy and a bad sleeper! My son was practically sleeping through the night at 3 weeks old and I was freaking out thinking something is wrong because everyone told me to expect sleepless nights, lots of tears and trouble with breastfeeding but that isn't the case for everyone." —Lexi P.

10. "The importance of skin to skin and the golden hour for those lucky enough to keep their babies with them after they're born ❤️" —Laura T.

11. "So so so much laundry! You'll be amazed at how many loads of tiny tiny clothes, blankets, burp cloths, etc you'll wash!"—Valerie C.

12. "I'm telling you, you can't 'spoil' a baby with cuddles. No matter how many people tell you that you will. Cuddle them, they're only small for a short time ❤️❤️" —Zoe L.

13. "That it is okay to restrict the amount of visitors at the hospital and the first few weeks at home. It's okay to be selfish and want that time to spend as a new family and bonding and getting used to the new baby! My husband and I were so overwhelmed with visitors. I was learning to breastfeed, had just been cut open and had a new baby! Those first few days as so special for the new parents!" —Heather S.

14. "That clipping their tiny nails would be a traumatic event."— Shannon A.

15. "All. The. Poop. Like up the back, out the sides, all over the sheets, in the hair kind of poop and how many onesies would be ruined." —Renee N.

16. "Until you get adjusted to your new life, you will probably cry just as much as they do." —Sarah S.

17. "That you're going to look/feel like a zombie the first 12 weeks until you get used to it. 😬" —Elyse C.

18. "They go through so many changes and will likely have a peak fussiness period around 5-7 weeks but just keep going it get better at 8 weeks. ❤️" —Jera L.

19. "'Success' must be redefined to be realistic. Everyday ask yourself two questions: Is the baby alive and well? Are you alive and well? If you can answer yes to both of those questions... BOOM, SUPER SUCCESSFUL PARENTING STREAK ACTIVATED! The dishes in the sink, laundry in the dryer, and general mess will always be there. Stop letting tasks determine your worth, ladies! Crushing it no matter what the backseat of your car looks like or if you've got some pile of wrinkly sheets on a couch somewhere!" —Melissa S.

20. "A lot, but the weird noises they make, and the quivering, the weird skin rashes like cradle cap or baby acne... I spent the first 6 weeks thinking my child was seizing and developing diseases all to find it's all normal newborn stuff." —Autumn G.

21. "Getting to shower IS your 'break'. The sleep while the baby sleep advice is silly, how feeling out of control emotionally is normal. I could go on and on." —Robin L.

22. "I wish someone taught me how to be assertive towards people who criticized me in that first year; I wish someone had told me how to believe in myself and trust my heart and guts as a new mom. I wish someone had told me that I was courageous strong and that no matter what unfolded to always remember that I am good and will always be good enough for her." —Chele Y.

23. "How afraid you are of holding or even touching your tiny human! I would just stare at my son and think what am I supposed to do with this fragile little creature like why was I allowed to take him home from the hospital?" —Sarah P.

24. "How easily and quickly postpartum depression can sneak up on you with your firstborn. I was able to recognize the signs the second time around and my heart is with every Momma that has ever had to go through it .💜" —Lekeitha W.

25. "It's okay to not feel this unconditional love the first time you see them. It takes time for some people. (But it does eventually happen!) I felt very ashamed of these feelings until I started talking to other moms about it." —Daylen H.

26. "It's okay to ask for help! It's normal to be stressed out. And it's not always possible to 'sleep when the baby sleeps.'" —Britanii H.

27. "How truly gassy they are. My little one would wake up crying in pain due to gas troubles. I felt sooo bad for him!" —Ashlee S.

28. "How lonely it can feel staying home with a tiny baby. Friends and family seem to disappear once you are home from the hospital." —Catrina B.

29. "It's normal for their soft spot to pulse." —Shea H.

30. "Just go topless with lots of nipple cream, get your water and Gatorade, some good shows, and be prepared to sit on a comfy chair all day and night!! Once I knew this was normal, life was so much easier than 'waiting' to get up every five minutes." —Lauren F.

31. "The fourth trimester, how much this little person needs all your time, witching hour." —Janice B.

32. "Wearing them is sanity-saving, and they love it (usually)." —Bridget N.

33. "They don't need A LOT OF STUFF! Most of it is waste of money and just a hype." —Caren A.

34. "That your friends and family will express so much excitement before baby but offer no real help after baby arrives. I didn't fully prepare to do it alone, but that's the way it turned out to be. I wish I'd hired a doula for birth and postpartum." —Dusty S.

35. "The people that bring you food and meals and stay for 20 minutes so you can have a decent shower are the best people ever!" —Georgia E.

36. "That the first week is the hardest! Breastfeeding is hard!" —LaTrease N.

37. "That the whole 'newborns nurse eight times a day, every 3 hours' doesn't apply to all newborns, and that you'll have to schedule your life around feedings for a long while." —Michali K.

38. "How much they want to nurse especially when they are building your supply. So many hours. Nipples were so raw. Also how THIRSTY I'd be and unmotivated to cook." —Rachel K.

39. "I didn't know how hard breastfeeding would be, physically and mentally. Those first 6 weeks it's a full-time job if your baby nurses often and it's really draining. Once you're past that hard stage though it's the best thing ever and so worth it." —Shanielea M.

40. "That they lose that 'newborn' look in just a few weeks. If i have another, I'll say no to the constant visitors and really take those first few weeks in because it was over too fast!" —Megan H.

41. "Forget the normal baby shower gifts someone else will cover that. Get the new mom MAID SERVICE, help her prepare crockpot meals, or even stop by and help do laundry. The daily chores is what I struggled with most in those early months." —Lauren C.

42. "You don't have to enjoy every moment. It's hard!" —Emily G.

43. "How to change your newborn son without getting peed on. After a few weeks in a friend was over and she showed me. I was so thankful!!" —Natalie W.

44. "How helpful the swaddle is! Once we used it correctly sleeping happened way more often." —Rebecca C.

45. "Not necessarily about newborns, but how totally amazing your mommy instinct is once it kicks in. Cant explain it but you'll feel it in your gut when something is wrong and sometimes it will help guide the tough parenting choices. Trust it!" —Jessica H.

46. "They grow up so quickly, and you'll miss the newborn phase. They did tell me, I didn't listen!" —Sarah L.

47."How much of your day is taken up by winding the baby! Used to take so long to get a burp!"— Indy C.

48. "They're a lot easier than toddlers." —Rachel H.

49. "I wish I knew more about safety measure for newborns. I found today that I used to do a few things in a wrong manner. Some mistakes could have been deadly. Thank God my kids are safe and healthy 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼" —Majida A.

50. "How much of your time is consumed by one little person." —Tosha G.

51. "The witching hour! That period of a few hours every night when they'll most likely want to nurse/eat all the time and just generally be inconsolable. We didn't learn about that until a few weeks into parenthood. 😅" —Tara Q.

52. "That literally everybody around you, from your family and friends, is giving you non requested advices on how to breastfeed, what you should be eating, how to hold or not hold the baby and how to make him sleep. But that at the end of the day the baby is yours and you know him better than anybody else, so just do as you feel like!" — Elisa B.

53. "It's pretty hard to break them! I was so nervous with our baby when she was first born, but they aren't as fragile as they seem and there was no reason to be SO paranoid!" —Dominique M.

54. "Babies can get acid reflux, making sleep very difficult and almost non-existent for baby and parents!" —Alyssa G.

55. "Don't [be mad at] your partner for not doing it your way (albeit the correct, highly-researched way 🤣) by kid #3 you won't care that they mismatched the outfits or gave your kid mashed peas for three meals in a row." — Alexis M.

56. "Yes, they sleep a lot, but it's not always at night. And for some babies, it's never, ever, ever anywhere but someone's arms. I never realized how much time I would spend just holding a sleeping baby and sitting." —Jillian E.

57. "That newborns and babies cry and scream for no apparent reason and it will feel like someone is flushing your intestines out and cutting your heart up with a scalpel and everyone just gives you 'that's The way the cookie crumbles with a baby', but no one tells you how much it hurts your new mothers heart... 😓" —Anita H.

58. "Take turns with your SO (if available/an option) at night so you can get rest. Even if you breastfeed, have your SO burp, change the diaper, and put baby back to bed so you can get more rest." —Jenna S.

59. "You'll be SO tired and yet your heart will be so so full." —Jenna S.

60. "How loud they are when they sleep!" —Mallory D.

61. "They normally don't want to sleep in a bassinet or crib! They want to be snuggled 💜" —Olive M.

62. "That it's okay if you don't bond with your baby immediately. It doesn't mean you are a terrible mother or that you don't love your baby. Some things take time. We had a traumatic delivery and it took me a couple of hours to really fall in love and I know friends where it's taken much longer but it wasn't for want of trying. We now all love our babies fiercely but it took time for some of us. ❤️" —Marissa J.

63. "How noisy they are! The grunting, snuffling, heavy breathing, crying and how their breathing is not regular just to scare the heck out of you at 2am when they decide to hold their breath. 😳" —Vicky B.

64. "The growth spurts, sleep regressions... currently six weeks and she didn't sleep at all last night! And how much coffee I would drink in a day." —Angela H.

65. "They are very in tune with your lifestyle even starting in the womb!" —Niccole A.

66. "That everything is always an experiment! I can't tell you how many things I ordered at 3am to try them out to see what worked best for our baby. Also, that you will need Amazon Prime because you're not leaving the house as quickly as you used to before." —Emily P.

67. "Never understood 'I love you so much it hurts' until I had my babies. It's a love that can't be explained but with that love is a worry I will never worry for anything or anyone the way i worry about my kids. You hear people say all this but you have to have kids to truly feel it." —Amanda M.

68. "Just that it's over way too quickly, so cherish every moment even the stressful ones because they will soon be in school before you know it and then that's it, it's gone... my baby is now an adult and I would love to be able to do it all again." —Ceriann F.

69. "That the newborn phase goes way too fast. 🥰" —Rachel

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I read and heard it all before. Toddlers are terrible. They are little dictators who go out of their way to make things hard. The 'terrible twos' and 'threenager' years made me nervous even when they were only in our future.

And then our son grew into a toddler and I realized that I love being a toddler mom way more than when I was a newborn mom.

You see, I didn't quite love the newborn days as much as everyone told me I would. Yes, I loved that little squishy tiny baby who would nap for hours cozied up in my arms, but I also felt so isolated from the world, touched out and exhausted.

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I really tried enjoying the stillness of snuggles in bed and the smell of the back of his head, but as much as I tried I just didn't. It was okay—but nothing out of this world like I thought it'd be.

As he started growing and becoming more interactive, I started to enjoy this new stage. Making him laugh would be the highlight of my day and I have endless videos to prove it. We would sit on the couch and make funny noises and he would look at me and giggle and I felt complete. Then he started sitting up and grabbing toys. We could play hide and seek and his face would glow every time I revealed the toy he thought had magically disappeared behind me.

It wasn't long before sounds that wanted to be words starting appearing in our lives. He knew the cow said "moo" from me reading the same book over and over again so he started saying it with me, and I'd be lying if I didn't say back then I thought my baby was an absolute genius for doing so.

He learned how to walk and I was so excited about not having to carry him everywhere. Sure, at first we took it very slowly and there was a lot of hand-holding and gentle exploring, but soon he was making his way up and down the playground choosing where we were going next without me making those decisions for him. He was showing his preferences—the slide always wins over the swing set and sitting in the playhouse is way more fun than the monkey bars.

His language skills exploded and he started telling us about his friends—little kids he plays with at the endless playdates our nanny organizes to keep him entertained and social— in choppy sentences. He slowly made up words, like bluebee for blueberries or flyfly or butterfly, that were used regularly in our conversations.

And as all these new things were happening and he was growing into a toddler, my enjoyment of being a mom grew more and more, too.

Don't get me wrong, not all days are easy. He's had his share of tantrums, rejecting food he used to love, not wanting to be around one of us (mostly me now that I'm super pregnant with his twin siblings) and keeps taunting our dogs by pulling their tails and taking over their beds. And yet I love it.

I love it because I get to see a glimpse of the person he will be.

I love it because all of those long and endless hours of playing with him—like stacking blocks, practicing saying "please" or even potty training—are finally paying off.

I love it because he can now tell me what song he wants to listen to, even if that song is The wheels on the bus for the millionth time that day.

I love it because I have so much fun playing pretend. We usually dig up sand (our carpet) and put it in a bucket (an imaginary one) and sometimes the stuffed animals come over and eat some of that sand.

I love it because his wild toddler imagination allows me to explore my own imagination, the one I've put on pause for so long because I was busy doing adult things, like having a job and paying bills.

His toddler world is so much fun and I enjoy being a part of it, every single day.

Life

As any parent knows, newborns need to eat a lot to keep fuel in those tiny tummies. For breastfeeding mamas, that can translate to nursing sessions anywhere, any time of day—which can make it feel like a full-time job.

These mamas have been super honest about their breastfeeding journeys, proving that while breastfeeding is beautiful, it can also be challenging, boring or require a lot of multitasking.

Ashley Graham enjoying a “multitasking sunday”

Breastfeeding takes a lot of time and energy. We see a lot of stock photos of moms staring down serenely at their baby during nursing sessions but in real life, sometimes mama needs to look at her phone.

That's why we love this snap Ashley Graham posted of her "multitasking Sunday".

Sometimes in early motherhood, it feels like you're glued to the couch or the bed and we love that technology can keep us connected to the world during a time that can be isolating.

Caterina Scorsone breastfeeding on the set of Grey’s Anatomy

The set of Grey's Anatomy is a breastfeeding-friendly workplace, according to Grey's star (and Motherly podcast guest) Caterina Scorsone.

"Nursing my baby at work. This is what feminist infrastructure looks like; workplaces that support working women, families, children and their development," she captioned this post published on her Instagram feed in February 2020.

"While also beautiful, breasts are miraculous tools for nourishment and motherhood rather than solely sexualized objects of the male gaze. For any women who are hurting, I deeply and lovingly hope that you can release and heal any shame you have accepted or taken on as a result of your feeding choices. And for the women who want to breastfeed but feel self conscious about it, I hope you can feel free and excited to nourish your baby in a way that has fantastic health benefits for you both," she wrote it a previous Instagram post.

Christina Anstead's postpartum selfie is peak #momlife 

Have you ever looked at a social media post from a new mom and wondered how she could look so put together and perfect despite having just had a baby? If so, you're not alone. The perfectly staged photos of new mothers posing with their impeccably dressed babies in their spotlessly neat homes are pretty common these days. And while they're lovely to look at, sometimes they can leave other new mamas wondering why their own realities don't look so idyllic. That's why we love when a new mother shows the messy side of new motherhood — and Christina Anstead just joined those ranks.

Christina, who welcomed baby Hudson London just two weeks ago, just gave us all a look at her new mom reality, and the unfiltered image shows something many of know all about: Leaky breasts.

In the photo, Christina lies in bed wearing a nursing tank with coloring foils in her hair. She's holding her baby, and you can clearly see a wet spot on her tank top. We all know this is way too real — leaky breasts are par for the course for new moms, even though no one seems to warn you about this!

Christina captions the photo "#MOMLIFE". Both her husband and her followers are loving the image. "☺️👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🔥🔥 love this! Love you! Cutest leaky boob mumma ever x," husband Ant Anstead writes. A follower adds "Out of all the pictures I've seen of you this is actually my favorite and you look the most beautiful! You're so in your element.!💜".

We're right there with them: This photo of Christina is real and relatable, and we love that she's showing the incredible multitasking moms do every single day. And she's practicing self-care by coloring her hair, which is wonderful to see (be sure to take care of yourself, mama! Whether that means sitting down to eat a nice, hot meal or having your hair done).

New motherhood is beautiful, but it's certainly not perfect. Unwashed hair, days-old clothes, serious under-eye bags, a messy home and, yes, leaky breasts are all part of the phase — and we love that this famous mama is showing that.

Jessie James Decker is a backseat breastfeeder

By the time her third child was born, Jessie James Decker had a few tricks up her sleeve when it came to breastfeeding on the go—including how to get situated in the backseat of the car to nurse her son while he was strapped into the car seat.

Decker doesn't recommend mamas go without a seatbelt like she did, but sometimes, a bad day out with the baby calls for extreme measures. When little Forrest couldn't stop crying on the way home from his mama's photo shoot, his mama did what she had to do.

"I hopped in the back seat with Forrest and fed him with boob out leaned awkwardly over the car seat to calm him down," Decker says. "On the way home I cried, I got stressed and anxiety, and I was just a mom trying to do my best just like we all are no matter the situation."

Ali Wong says “breastfeeding is a blast”

Some #breastfeeding posts on Instagram remind us that breastfeeding is beautiful. But comedian Ali Wong's breastfeeding posts remind us that (just like motherhood in general) there are times that it doesn't feel so beautiful (and that's okay).

"Breastfeeding is a blast," she sarcastically captioned a photo of herself during a nursing session.

In her Netflix special Wong joked that "Breastfeeding is brutal. It is chronic physical torture. I thought it was supposed to be this beautiful bonding ceremony… Breastfeeding is this savage ritual that just reminds you that your body is a cafeteria now! It don't belong to you no more."

Wong's humor is refreshingly honest and reminds the rest of us that it's okay if breastfeeding doesn't feel beautiful all the time.

Amy Schumer is pumping with no shame

When Amy Schumer went back to work two weeks after giving birth to her son, some internet commenters were quick to dish out mom shame, suggesting that she needed to "at least let the stitches dissolve first."

In the comments section of her Instagram post, Schumer joked "I've always wanted to be mom shamed!!!!"

The next day she posted a photo of herself pumping breastmilk and captioned it "sending out love to the moms shaming me for doing standup last night!"

Schumer went back to work because she loves what she does, but many moms go back to work and pump because they have to—and nobody should be shamed for that.

Some mamas pump at work, some nurse at home and some fill bottles with formula to send to day care. We may do things differently but we're all doing our best.

Tia Mowry nurses with love

Tia Mowry's breastfeeding story proves that mamas can have totally different experiences with different children. She wasn't able to nurse her son Cree for long, but found it easier with her daughter Cairo.

Six weeks after Cairo's birth Mowry wrote on Instagram: "Wasn't able to breastfeed Cree for long because of low milk supply! However, this time around I have plenty. Lots of teas, water, #fenugreek, and a high protein diet has contributed! More importantly, say no to stress!! I'm able to pump 12 ounces alone in the morning for my little brown suga!"

Hilary Duff knows her limits

When Hilary Duff announced that she was done breastfeeding her daughter Banks, we supported her choice.

"I am a working mom of two. My goal was to get my little girl to six months and then decide if I (and her of course) wanted to keep going. Let me tell you. Pumping at work sucks," Duff wrote on Instagram.

"I needed a break. I was going to break," she writes. "With the stress of a dropping milk supply and a baby that was getting bored or not caring about nursing when I was available to. I was sad and frustrated and feeling like a failure all of the time. When really I'm a bad ass rock star."

Deciding to stop breastfeeding is a valid choice and we appreciate Duff's honesty.

Pink takes a hike

Sometimes mamas need to stop breastfeeding, and sometimes they need to find a way to just keep on going.

When son Jameson was a baby, Pink proved that breastfeeding didn't have to mean sitting at home in a glider. With some assistance from a baby carrier and a perfect position for Jameson, the multitasking mama was able to go about her hike like it was no big deal.

Chrissy Teigen teaches the next generation

When Chrissy Teigen's son Miles was still in that newborn stage and breastfeeding constantly, her oldest, daughter Luna, decided that mama should breastfeed her doll, too.

When she wasn't holding babies and dolls to her breasts she was holding pumps to them, because Chrissy isn't just the Queen of Twitter, she's the queen of multitasking.

Jessica Alba juggled work and breastfeeding

Jessica Alba is another multitasking mama who made the most of every minute of the day and every ounce of breast milk when her son Hayes was a newborn. She brought the little guy to board meetings at the Honest Company offices, breastfed him in Target fitting rooms and, like Duff, eventually decided to switch to formula.

"I felt like he wanted to nurse 24/7, which was obviously really challenging when you're trying to go back to work," Alba told Motherly in 2018.

She wasn't just busy with the Honest Company in the early weeks and months of Hayes' life, but also shooting her TV series with Gabrielle Union, 'LA's Finest.' The timing of the opportunity wasn't ideal, but the project was.

"I was actually bummed about it, I really did want to take four months but I got the pilot offer and it just happened to be shooting, so it cut into my maternity leave," she said.

"Also my milk supply was challenged with him. I felt like I had the most milk with Honor [her oldest daughter] and then it got less with Haven [her middle child] and even less with Hayes. And so that was just tough for me," she explained.

Thandie Newton proves mamas can breastfeed anywhere

Mothers in America are often challenged about their right to breastfeed in public, but actress Thandi Newton's throwback Insta post shows that moms is a great reminder that mothers in America are free to breastfeed anywhere, whenever they need to.

American mothers "have the right to breastfeed your baby wherever and whenever your baby is hungry," according to the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services' Office on Women's Health.

"This is what my body is made for. And the rest is my choice. #Freedom," Newton captioned her nursing selfie.

Eva Longoria Baston breastfed while making TV

Eva Longoria has an amazing career as an actress, producer and director, and she's also a first-time mom who has spent the last year breastfeeding on set.

"Here are pics of me directing while breastfeeding Santi during filming of @GrandHotelABC," Eva captions her post. "Women multitask everyday & I was lucky to have an amazing crew & cast that supported my new motherhood + career goals!"

The fact that she shared this look at her life with her followers means a lot to moms everywhere who are struggling with endless feedings, taking care of a million things at once, and public breastfeeding in a society that doesn't always normalize the act.

She's totally right: Having supportive colleagues helps a ton. Research shows that support from colleagues is essential for moms when it comes to pumping and nursing at work.

Gisele Bündchen 'grammed her breastfeeding glam session

In 2013, the super model proved she's also a super mama by multitasking a full-on beauty session while breastfeeding. Recognizing what a team effort it was, Bündchen captioned the post, "What would I do without this beauty squad after the 15 hours of flying and only three hours of sleep."

Tess Holliday was inspired by her fellow supermodel mama

Tess Holliday followed in Gisele's footsteps after her youngest was born, posting this photo to Instagram. It that proves that breastfeeding mamas can not only multitask, but also don't have to conform to certain body ideals to look amazing postpartum. Any size, any shape, any time, anywhere—breastfeeding mothers like Holliday are normalizing breastfeeding and our bodies

Padma Lakshmi proves you don't need a team

Without a beauty squad on call, Lakshmi took her multitasking to "level 💯" by using a nursing pillow to free up her two hands. It takes a brave woman to attempt mascara while breastfeeding, but the Top Chef host clearly pulls it off.

Whether a mama is trying to feed her baby on the go or while she's getting glam, it isn't always easy.Motherhood is about trying to do your best even when it feels like 100 things are going on at the same time—and yet we manage, like the super mamas we are.

Whether a mama is trying to feed her baby on the go or while she's getting glam, it isn't always easy. Motherhood is about trying to do your best even when it feels like 100 things are going on at the same time—and yet we manage, like the super mamas we are.

[This post was originally published June 12, 2018. It has been updated.]

News

There are few kids television shows as successful as PAW Patrol. The Spin Masters series has spawned countless toys and clothing deals, a live show and now, a movie.

That's right mama, PAW Patrol is coming to the big screen in 2021.

The big-screen version of PAW Patrol will be made with Nickelodeon Movies and will be distributed by Paramount Pictures.

"We are thrilled to partner with Paramount and Nickelodeon to bring the PAW Patrol franchise, and the characters that children love, to the big screen," Spin Master Entertainment's Executive Vice President, Jennifer Dodge, announced Friday.

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"This first foray into the arena of feature film marks a significant strategic expansion for Spin Master Entertainment and our properties. This demonstrates our commitment to harnessing our own internal entertainment production teams to develop and deliver IP in a motion picture format and allows us to connect our characters to fans through shared theatrical experiences," Dodge says.

No word on the plot yet, but we're gonna bet there's a problem, 'round Aventure Bay, and Ryder and his team of pups will come and save the day.

We cannot even imagine how excited little PAW Patrol fans will be when this hits theatres in 2021. It's still too early to buy advance tickets but we would if we could!

News

In the middle of that postpartum daze, the sleepless nights, the recovery, the adjustment to a new schedule and learning the cues of a new baby, there are those moments when a new mom might think, I don't know how long I can do this.

Fortunately, right around that time, newborns smile their first real smile.

For many mothers, the experience is heart-melting and soul-lifting. It's a crumb of sustenance to help make it through the next challenges, whether that's sleep training, baby's first cold, or teething. Each time that baby smiles, the mother remembers, I can do this, and it's worth it.

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Dayna M. Kurtz, LMSW, CPT a NYC-based psychotherapist and author of Mother Matters: A Holistic Guide to Being a Happy, Healthy Mom, says she sees this in her clinical practice.

"One mother I worked with recounted her experience of her baby's first smile. At eight weeks postpartum, exhausted and overwhelmed, she remembered her baby smiling broadly at her just before a nighttime feeding," Kurtz says. "In that moment, she was overcome by tremendous joy and relief, and felt, for the first time, a real connection to her son."

So what is it about a baby's smile that can affect a mother so deeply? Can it all be attributed to those new-mom hormones? Perhaps it stems from the survival instincts that connect an infant with its mother, or the infant learning social cues. Or is there something more going on inside our brains?

In 2008, scientists in Houston, TX published their research on the topic. Their study, "What's in a Smile? Maternal Brain Responses to Infant Facial Cues", takes data from the MRI images of 26 women as they observed images of infants smiling, crying, or with a neutral expression.

The images included the mother's own infant alternated with an unknown infant of similar ethnicity and in similar clothing and position. In each image, the baby displayed a different emotion through one of three facial expressions; happy, neutral, or sad. Researchers monitored the change in the mothers' brain activity through the transitions in images from own-infant to unknown-infant, and from happy to neutral to sad and vice versa.

The results?

"When first-time mothers see their own baby's face, an extensive brain network appears to be activated, wherein affective and cognitive information may be integrated and directed toward motor/behavioral outputs," wrote the study's authors. Seeing her infant smile or cry prompts the areas of the brain that would instigate a mother to act, whether it be to comfort, care for, or caress and play with the baby.

In addition, the authors found that reward-related brain regions are activated specifically in response to happy, but not sad, baby faces. The areas of the brain that lit up in their study are the same areas that release dopamine, the "pleasure chemical." For context, other activities that elicit dopamine surges include eating chocolate, having sex, or doing drugs. So in other words, a baby's smile may be as powerful as those other feel-good experiences.

And this gooey feeling moms may get from seeing their babies smile isn't just a recreational high—it serves a purpose.

This reward system (aka dopaminergic and oxytocinergic neuroendocrine system) exists to motivate the mother to forge a positive connection with the baby, according to Aurélie Athan, PhD, director of the Reproductive & Maternal Psychology Laboratory (a laboratory that created the first graduate courses of their kind in these subjects).

These networks also promote a mother's ability to share her emotional state with her child, which is the root of empathy. "A mother cries when baby cries, smiles when baby smiles," Athan says.

While there's a physiological explanation underlying that warm-and-fuzzy sensation elicited by a smile, there may be other factors at play too, Kurtz says.

"In my clinical practice, I often observe a stunning exchange between a mother and her baby when the latter smiles at her. A mother who is otherwise engaged in conversation with me may be, for that moment, entirely redirected to focus on her little one," Kurtz says. "This kind of attention-capturing on the part of the baby can enable and cultivate maternal attunement—a mother's ability to more deeply connect with her infant. The quality of attunement in early childhood often sets the stage for one's relationship patterns in the future."

Whether a physiological response, a neural activation, simple instinct, or the tightening of emotional connection, the feeling generated by babies' smiles is a buoy in the choppy ocean of new parenthood.

And while the first smile may be the most magical by virtue of its surprise and the necessity of that emotional lift, the fuzzy feeling can continue well into that baby's childhood and beyond. It keeps telling parents, you've got this!

[This was originally published on Apparently]

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