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It was just like many other mornings--I had missed my period, and peed on that little stick we all have had under our bathroom sink (just in case). But this time it was different. A plus sign. For a glimpse of time I felt it: pure happiness. We hadn’t been “trying” but we had mutually agreed; we are married, we are happy–why not? But that moment of pure excitement was fleeting. During my first ultrasound, we saw our little poppy seed sized baby...actually, two of them.

We left with our heads spinning, and I cried. How would I ever love two babies at the same time? It seemed impossible.

Not in that ultrasound, nor any other, did I ever have that movie moment where I was so excited to see what I was creating inside of me. But I kept it to myself and played the excited new-mom-to-be role.

Carrying twins was not easy for me. I was miserably uncomfortable, and all I could think was: I can’t do this, I hate this. I succeeded in what I considered “my job,” and carried our two babies to full term. Lying on the operating table, as my children were being born, I secretly thought to myself: thank god I don’t have to carry this around with me anymore.

Then I held them and I thought to myself: am I supposed to feel different than this? The only stories I had heard were the ones about immediate love and bonding. Instead, I felt the weight of pure responsibility...times two. All of a sudden, I was expected to nurture and breastfeed TWO babies?

What is wrong with me, I kept thinking to myself. After all, I am usually a loving and emotional being. I love everything, and I “bond” with complete strangers.

The first months blurred by as we pushed through new parenthood. Home alone with two newborns, I dreaded 6 a.m. when my husband left for work. I felt trapped, scheduled, exhausted. I didn’t feel love or an emotional connection. I talked with my other new mom friends and just listened as they swooned about how in love they were with their babies.

In a desperate, 3 a.m. and I haven’t slept in days moment, I googled, “Twins Not Bonding.” I read an article asserting that twin moms don’t bond like other moms do, and it made perfect sense to me.

With twins, I didn’t get to live the mom life I fantasized about. I didn’t have a chance to hold my baby all day and night, and be completely available to meet all of his or her demands, which is what I secretly imagined “singleton” moms did, even though I know they don’t.

As the months passed, things started getting better. However, it was more about gaining knowledge and feeling more comfortable in my role. My husband and I knew how to respond to our babies better than anyone else, but I still didn’t feel a true connection. I still had glimpses of worry.

I returned to work, and what felt most distressing was not dropping my babies off to be cared for by someone else. My major concern was that their teacher would get them off the schedule I had worked so hard on. I was not worried that they would love her more, or that she would get to spend more time with them. I was concerned that they wouldn’t eat for her, they would get diaper rash, or they would completely lose their napping schedule and stop sleeping at night. God, don’t let them stop sleeping through the night, I prayed every day when I picked them up at daycare.

And then it happened. The thing I most feared would never happen, the thing I convinced myself was ok because “twin moms do it different.” We bonded, all of us.

I can say confidently, now that they are five months old, that I love my babies fiercely and they love me. But looking back, I can also say confidently that connecting with them had nothing to do with being a mom of twins. I just didn’t bond immediately. It was much easier for me to cope with this paramount change through practical tasks and not emotional connectedness. It doesn’t mean I don’t love my babies as much as the next mom, and it is completely ok.

If I felt this way others must too--twins or not. And no one should have to sit up in the middle of the night, googling “how to bond with your baby,” and feel like a lesser mother because of it. Maybe I can never measure up to your perfect “When I felt the first kick...”, “Natural birth was magical,” “As soon as I held them, my heart exploded” story. But I don’t need to. For some of us, bonding happens immediately, and for others, it’s at five months, or a year or beyond.

What I know for sure is I will never be the all-positive or all-negative storytelling mother. Friend, family, co-worker, or stranger, you will know the full story. I hated being pregnant, I sometimes seriously disliked my newborns (and I sometimes dislike my infants as well), and I still daydream about my days of no responsibility. But I also think my babies are the greatest, and I love everything about them. Being a mother is the best present and responsibility I have ever been awarded.

This journey is different for all of us. At a time when we are pumped full of hormones and about to change everything in our lives that we have ever known, we need to lift each other up. We are a team: Team Mom.

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With two babies in tow, getting out the door often becomes doubly challenging. From the extra things to carry to the extra space needed in your backseat, it can be easy to feel daunted at the prospect of a day out. But before you resign yourself to life indoors, try incorporating these five genius products from Nuna to get you and the littles out the door. (Because Vitamin D is important, mama!)

1. A brilliant double stroller

You've got more to carry—and this stroller gets it. The DEMI™ grow stroller from Nuna easily converts from a single ride to a double stroller thanks to a few easy-to-install accessories. And with 23 potential configurations, you're ready to hit the road no matter what life throws at you.

DEMI™ grow stroller
$799.95, Nuna

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2. A light car seat

Lugging a heavy car seat is the last thing a mama of two needs to have on her hands. Instead, pick up the PIPA™ lite, a safe, svelte design that weighs in at just 5.3 pounds (not counting the canopy or insert)—that's less than the average newborn! When you need to transition from car to stroller, this little beauty works seamlessly with Nuna's DEMI™ grow.

PIPA™ lite car seat
$349.95, Nuna

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3. A super safe car seat base

The thing new moms of multiples really need to get out the door? A little peace of mind. The PIPA™ base features a steel stability leg for maximum security that helps to minimize forward rotation during impact by up to 90% (compared to non-stability leg systems) and 5-second installation for busy mamas.

PIPA™ base
(included with purchase of PIPA™ series car seat or) Nuna, $159.95

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4. A diaper bag you want to carry

It's hard to find an accessory that's as stylish as it is functional. But the Nuna diaper bag pulls out all the stops with a sleek design that perfectly conceals a deceptively roomy interior (that safely stores everything from extra diapers to your laptop!). And with three ways to wear it, even Dad will want to take this one to the park.

Diaper bag
$179.95, Nuna

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5. A crib that travels

Getting a new baby on a nap schedule—while still getting out of the house—is hard. But with the SENA™ aire mini, you can have a crib ready no matter where your day takes you. It folds down and pops up easily for sleepovers at grandma's or unexpected naps at your friend's house, and the 360-degree ventilation ensures a comfortable sleep.

SENA aire mini
$199.95, Nuna

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With 5 essentials that are as flexible as you need to be, the only thing we're left asking is, where are you going to go, mama?

This article was sponsored by Nuna. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.


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Baby stuff comes in such cute prints these days. Gone are the days when everything was pink and blue and covered in ducks or teddy bears. Today's baby gear features stylish prints that appeal to mom.

That's why it's totally understandable how a mama could mistake a car seat cover for a cute midi skirt. It happened to Lori Farrell, and when she shared her mishap on Facebook she went viral before she was even home from work. Fellow moms can totally see the humor in Farrell's mishap, and thankfully, so can she.

As for how a car seat cover could be mistaken for a skirt—it's pretty simple, Farrell tells Motherly.

"A friend of mine had given me a huge lot of baby stuff, from clothes to baby carriers to a rocker and blankets and when I pulled it out I was not sure what it was," she explains. "I debated it but washed it anyway then decided because of the way it pulled on the side it must be a maternity skirt."

Farrell still wasn't 100% sure if she was right by the time she headed out the door to work, but she rocked the ambiguous attire anyway.

"When I got to work I googled the brand and realized not only do they not sell clothing but it was a car seat cover."

The brand, Itzy Ritzy, finds the whole thing pretty funny too, sharing Farell's viral moment to its official Instagram.

It may be a car seat cover, but that print looks really good on this mama.

And if you want to copy Farell's style, the Itzy Ritzy 4-in-1 Nursing Cover, Car Seat Cover, Shopping Cart Cover and Infinity Scarf (and skirt!) is available on Amazon for $24.94.

Motherly is your daily #momlife manual; we are here to help you easily find the best, most beautiful products for your life that actually work. We share what we love—and we may receive a commission if you choose to buy.You've got this.

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Daycare for infants is expensive across the country, and California has one of the worst states for parents seeking care for a baby. Putting an infant in daycare in California costs $2,914 more than in-state tuition for four years of college, according to the Economic Policy Institute.

Paying north of $1,000 for daycare each month is an incredible burden, especially on single-parent families. The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services defines affordable childcare as costing no more than 10% of a family's income—by that definition, less than 29% of families in California can afford infant care. Some single parents spend half their income on day care. It is an incredible burden on working parents.

But that burden may soon get lighter. CBS Sacramento reports California may put between $25 and $35 million into child care programs to make day care more affordable for parents with kids under 3 years old.

Assembly Bill 452, introduced this week, could see $10 million dollars funneled into Early Head Start (which currently gets no money from the state but does get federal funding) and tens of millions more would be spent on childcare for kids under three.

The bill seeks to rectify a broken childcare system. Right now, only about 14% of eligible infants and toddlers are enrolled in subsidized programs in California, and in 2017, only 7% of eligible children younger than three years of age accessed Early Head Start.

An influx of between $25 to $35 million dollars could see more spaces open up for kids under three, as Bill 452, if passed, would see the creation of "grants to develop childcare facilities that serve children from birth to three years of age."

This piece of proposed legislation comes weeks after California's governor announced an ambitious plan for paid parental leave, and as another bill, AB 123, seeks to strengthen the state's pre-kindergarten program.

Right now, it is difficult for some working parents to make a life in California, but by investing in families, the state's lawmakers could change that and change California's future for the better.

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When a mama gets married, in most cases she wants her children to be part of her big day. Photographers are used to hearing bride-to-be moms request lots of pictures of their big day, but when wedding photographer Laura Schaefer of Fire and Gold Photography heard her client Dalton Mort planned to wear her 2-year-old daughter Ellora instead of a veil, she was thrilled.

A fellow mama who understands the benefits of baby-wearing, Schaefer was keen to capture the photos Mort requested. "When I asked Dalton about what some of her 'must get' shots would be for her wedding, she specifically asked for ones of her wearing Ellie, kneeling and praying in the church before the tabernacle," Schaefer tells Motherly.

She got those shots and so many more, and now Mort's toddler-wearing wedding day pics are going viral.

"Dalton wore Ellie down the aisle and nursed her to sleep during the readings," Schaefer wrote on her blog, explaining that Ellie then slept through the whole wedding mass.

"As a fellow mother of an active toddler, this is a HUGE win! Dalton told me after that she was SO grateful that Ellie slept the whole time because she was able to focus and really pray through the Mass," Schaefer explains.

Dalton was able to concentrate on her wedding day because she made her baby girl a part of it (and that obviously tired Ellie right out).

Ellie was part of the commitment and family Dalton if forging with her husband, Jimmy Joe. "There is no better behaved toddler than a sleeping toddler, and she was still involved, even though I ended up unwrapping her to nurse her. I held her in my arms while my husband and I said our vows. It was really special for us," Dalton told POPSUGAR.

This is a wedding trend we are totally here for!

Congrats to Dalton and Jimmy Joe (and to Ellie)! 🎉

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The internet is freaking out about how Peppa Pig is changing the way toddlers speak, but parents don't need to be too worried.

As Romper first reported, plenty of American parents have noticed that preschoolers are picking up a bit of a British accent thanks to Peppa. Romper's Janet Manley calls it "the Peppa effect," noting that her daughter started calling her "Mummy" after an in-flight Peppa marathon.


Plenty of other parents report sharing Manley's experience, but the British accent is not likely to stick, experts say.

Toronto-based speech and language pathologist Melissa James says this isn't a new thing—kids have always been testing out the accents they hear on TV and in the real world, long before Peppa oinked her way into our Netflix queues.

"Kids have this amazing ability to pick up language," James told Global News. "Their brains are ripe for the learning of language and it's a special window of opportunity that adults don't possess."

Global News reports that back in the day there were concerns about Dora The Explorer potentially teaching kids Spanish words before the kids had learned the English counterparts, and over in the U.K., parents have noticed British babies picking up American accents from TV, too.

But it's not a bad thing, James explains. When an American adult hears "Mummy" their brain translates it to "Mommy," but little kids don't yet make as concrete a connection. "When a child, two, three or four, is watching a show with a British accent and hears [words] for the first time, they are mapping out the speech and sound for that word in the British way."

So if your baby is oinking at you, calling you "Mummy" or testing out a new pronunciation of "toh-mah-toe," know that this is totally natural, and they're not going to end up with a life-long British pig accent.

As Dr, Susannah Levi, associate professor of communicative sciences and disorders at New York University, tells The Guardian, "it's really unlikely that they'd be acquiring an entire second dialect from just watching a TV show."

It sure is cute though.

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