Reflections: The Latch

Nadine Rubin Nathan, editorial director of Pelluceo Publishing, shares her breastfeeding journey.

Reflections: The Latch

When my daughter A was born, she weighed a mere 5lbs 12oz. Despite an emergency C-section, my milk came in, and her tiny mouth was able to latch onto my comparably enormous nipple. But the day we were set to leave the hospital, Alexa had dropped weight (as all babies do) and was down to 5lbs 3oz. The pediatrician instructed me to supplement her feeds with formula to ensure that her weight didn’t drop any further.

A nurse helped me attach a tiny tube to the end of a syringe and then tape the tube to my nipple so that I could add formula to her feed as she nursed. This worked well for us for the first two days, and I was sure that we were on our way to establishing a solid nursing routine.

I had hired a postpartum doula for a couple of hours a day. She arrived at our apartment on the third day, took one look at the feeding tube and told me it was unnecessary. “Just give her the formula in a bottle,” she advised. “It will be so much easier for you.”

Two days later, Alexa refused to latch. She had developed “nipple confusion.” Her weight had picked up and it was no longer necessary for me to supplement, so I began to pump and feed her breastmilk from a bottle. But I wanted her to latch again, so I found a lactation consultant to help me.

On the first day, the lactation consultant arrived minutes before A was due to wake up for a feed. I told her what had been going on, and she assured me that she could help. Then my daughter woke up, screaming so hysterically that the lactation consultant was visibly shaken. We both tried in vain to get her to calm down enough to try and latch. Eventually the lactation consultant ordered me to give her the bottle.

As my daughter sucked happily on the silicone nipple, she told me that she hadn’t seen a baby this hungry in some time. She advised me to continue to pump and give her the bottle at the beginning of each feed to take the edge off and then to try and coax her back onto the breast. She showed me how to use nipple guards to mimic the texture of the artificial nipple and to dribble a little breastmilk onto them to make them more enticing. She assured me that as my daughter’s hunger was satiated and she grew stronger, she would find her way back to the breast. All I had to do was keep offering it to her at each feed and spend hours skin to skin in bed with her.

Every day for the next four weeks I spent most of the day in bed with Alexa. And when we weren’t in bed she was in a baby carrier pressed against my chest. At each feed, I dutifully began with a bottle and then followed up with my nipples, only to be rejected over and over again. It was painful. With all the hormones still raging in my body, it was difficult not to feel devastated that my baby didn’t seem to want to bond with me. And I felt guilty. What was wrong with me?

Some days I didn’t have the emotional strength to handle her screaming until the bottle was offered again, so I took a break and tried again the following morning (often with my husband’s encouragement). But the constant pumping was getting me down, and I started to set time limits in my head. I decided I would probably only make it to three months. And so what? After all, I was a formula-fed baby, and I hadn’t turned out too badly.

The reason I didn’t throw in the towel earlier was the fact that I had gestational diabetes during my pregnancy. I had read that breastfeeding could lower the likelihood of both of us developing diabetes in later life.

But as more time passed, the idea that my daughter would still remember how to latch seemed counter-intuitive. I figured she would lose the instinct as she grew older. Then I saw a posting for a meeting of the local La Leche League and decided to attend.

The room was filled with nursing mothers and I felt distinctly self-conscious taking out a bottle, even if it was filled with breastmilk. The La Leche League leaders went around the room asking each woman to share her experience. I quickly realized that almost everyone had struggled with breastfeeding in the beginning — sore nipples, low milk supply, blocked ducts and, in some cases, oversupply.

Then a woman who was happily nursing her son began to speak. This little breastfeeding pro was 10 weeks old, and it turned out that he had only begun latching two weeks earlier. His mother was able to coax him back onto the breast by taking lots of baths with him and putting him onto her chest in the warm water.

Just hearing that someone else had actually managed to achieve what had begun to feel like the impossible gave me the extra boost I needed to keep going. And a few weeks later, I too had managed to get my daughter to latch.

I was no longer a slave to the breastpump. I finally had the bonding experience I had so longed for, and ultimately, I nursed my daughter until she was 14 months old.

Image via Pinterest.

12 outdoor toys your kids will want to play with beyond summer

They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

Without camps and back-to-school plans still TBD, the cries of "I'm bored!" seem to be ringing louder than ever this summer. And if you're anything like me, by August, I'm fresh out of boxes to check on my "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in summer-only toys.

With that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite wooden toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play.

From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

Meadow ring toss game

Plan Toys meadow ring toss game

Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.


Balance board

Plan Toys balance board

Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!


Sand play set

Plan Toys sand set

Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.


Water play set

Plan Toys water play set

Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.


Mini golf set

Plan Toys mini golf set

Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.


Vintage scooter balance bike

Janod retro scooter balance bike

Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.


Wooden rocking pegasus

plan toys wooden rocking pegasus

Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.


Croquet set

Plan Toys croquet set

The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.


Wooden digital camera

fathers factory wooden digital camera

Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.


Wooden bulldozer toy

plan toys wooden bulldozer toy

Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.


Pull-along hippo

janod toys pull along hippo toy

There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.


Baby forest fox ride-on

janod toys baby fox ride on

Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.


We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.


Sorry, you can’t meet our baby yet

Thank you for understanding. ❤️

In just over three weeks, we will become parents. From then on, our hearts will live outside of our bodies. We will finally understand what everyone tells you about bringing a child into the world.

Lately, the range of emotions and hormones has left me feeling nothing short of my new favorite mom word, "hormotional." I'm sure that's normal though, and something most people start to feel as everything suddenly becomes real.

Our bags are mostly packed, diaper bag ready, and birth plan in place. Now it's essentially a waiting game. We're finishing up our online childbirth classes which I must say are quite informational and sometimes entertaining. But in between the waiting and the classes, we've had to think about how we're going to handle life after baby's birth.

I don't mean thinking and planning about the lack of sleep, feeding schedule, or just the overall changes a new baby is going to bring. I'm talking about how we're going to handle excited family members and friends who've waited just as long as we have to meet our child. That sentence sounds so bizarre, right? How we're going to handle family and friends? That sentence shouldn't even have to exist.

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In Montessori schools, parents are periodically invited to observe their children at work in the classroom. I have heard many parents express shock to see their 3- or 4-year-old putting away their own work when they finish—without even being asked!

"You should see his room at home!" or, "I ask him to put his toys away every day, and it's a battle every single time" were frequent comments.

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