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Is your baby only sleeping 2 hours at a time? Does your toddler sneak in your bed every night? Either way, you probably read all the books and tried all the techniques to help your little one (and yourself) catch some ZZZs. And just when you think you are mastering the ins and outs of a good night’s sleep, BAM! – your wee one is back at his old tricks, and you to square one.

There’s no one-size-fit-all approach to getting your baby to sleep well. How do I know that? I have three children: four-months-old twin girls and a three-year-old boy. When it comes to their slumbers, my littlest ones are like night and day, but somehow they are both sleeping beauties (for now).

My oldest one is a different story. We are still trying to figure out how to get him to sleep, and if there’s one thing his sleep problems have taught me, it’s this: raising a good sleeper is more of a marathon than it is a sprint. So without further ado – and in case you need a reminder that you’re not the only one pulling all-nighters with your babes – here’s my exhausting tale.


After Kenzo was born, it took him a week or two to get his days and nights figured out. He usually breastfed for about 45 minutes and took about an hour of rocking and bouncing to fall asleep. This left me with only an hour to rest before he woke up again to nurse. Kenzo slept in his own crib, but in our room – where else would he sleep in our 650 square feet one-bedroom Brooklyn apartment?

When he turned 8 weeks old, I tried what the book On Becoming Babywise calls the 3-hour “eat-play-sleep” schedule . Kenzo took to it right away and began to nap better and sleep longer stretches at night. By three months, he would go down drowsy but awake and sleep 10 long consecutive hours a night. It was amazing. I attribute our success to three things: the eat-play-sleep schedule, the swaddle, and thumb-sucking to soothe himself.

But the glorious period of good sleep stopped suddenly when Kenzo was 5 months old. We hit a “wonder week,” a leap, a developmental milestone – whatever you want to call it; personally, I call it HELL! At that point, he learned to roll on to his belly (bye-bye swaddle), but would get stuck and angry and would scream until someone came and flipped him. His bottom teeth erupted (bye-bye thumb-sucking), and I think he also developed object permanence right around that time. We were basically back to the newborn stage of waking every two hours. After experiencing the awesomeness of uninterrupted sleep for a few months (and knowing that he was physically capable of sleeping through the night), that regression was much harder to take.

Out of desperation, we tried the cry-it-out sleep training method many a time over the next year and a half. Hearing him cry for more than 5 minutes broke my heart, but within a few days he was going down quietly and happily. Fast forward a few weeks or months, and we’d be back to square one after an illness or a new developmental milestone. Cry-it-out again. And repeat.

Eventually, we moved to a bigger place and were able to give Kenzo his own room. We tried the cry-it-out method one last time. But when our neighbor stomped on our ceiling out of protest, we chickened out and ended up with the “side-car” sleeping arrangement, which we still have now.

Yes, our three-year-old son still sleeps in our room – more or less in our bed. But since weaning him last year, he’s been sleeping through the night. Sure, he can’t go to bed without me, and we will have to make some bedtime adjustments when he starts Pre-K in September, but we are all getting great sleep. So we are all good, for now!

Getting our little ones to sleep can be tough, and not (just) because some babies are light sleepers. The very fact that there are so many different opinions out there will make you second guess yourself. Take the cry-it-out technique, for example: some swear by it, saying it’s necessary in order to have not only a good sleeper, but also a happier and healthier child. Others view the method as synonymous to child abuse.

What do I say? If you are a good person, chances are your kid is going to grow up to be pretty fantastic. So ask your friends, family and pediatrician for advice. Do your research, read some books, google (with moderation), and go with what feels best for you and your family – this goes for sleep and all other aspects of parenting. Oh and don’t forget one very important word: consistency! Stick to your guns. You got this, and you are rocking this parenting thing.

Written by Heather Tomoyasu. Heather is a vlogger and blogger on her site US-Japan Fam, owner of Miny Moe, author of “Legit Ways to Make Money From Home” (available on Kindle and iTunes), founder of Tunes 4 Bay Ridge Tots, and mommy to a yummy toddler plus newborn twins! You can follow and connect with her on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

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If there's one thing you learn as a new mama, it's that routine is your friend. Routine keeps your world spinning, even when you're trucking along on less than four hours of sleep. Routine fends off tantrums by making sure bellies are always full and errands aren't run when everyone's patience is wearing thin. And routine means naps are taken when they're supposed to, helping everyone get through the day with needed breaks.

The only problem? Life doesn't always go perfectly with the routine. When my daughter was born, I realized quickly that, while her naps were the key to a successful (and nearly tear-free!) day, living my life according to her nap schedule wasn't always possible. There were groceries to fetch, dry cleaning to pick up, and―if I wanted to maintain any kind of social life―lunch dates with friends to enjoy.

Which is why the Ergobaby Metro Compact City Stroller was such a life-saver. While I loved that it was just 14 pounds (perfect for hoisting up the stairs to the subway or in the park) and folds down small enough to fit in an airplane overhead compartment (you know, when I'm brave enough to travel again!), the real genius of this pint-sized powerhouse is that it doesn't skimp on comfort.

Nearly every surface your baby touches is padded with plush cushions to provide side and lumbar support to everything from their sweet head to their tiny tush―it has 40% more padding than other compact strollers. When nap time rolls around, I could simply switch the seat to its reclined position with an adjustable leg rest to create an instant cozy nest for my little one.

There's even a large UV 50 sun canopy to throw a little shade on those sleepy eyes. And my baby wasn't the only one benefiting from the comfortable design― the Metro is the only stroller certified "back healthy" by the AGR of Germany, meaning mamas get a much-needed break too.

I also appreciate how the Metro fits comfortably into my life. The sleek profile fits through narrow store aisles as easily as it slides up to a table when I'm able to meet a pal for brunch. Plus, the spring suspension means the tires absorb any bumps along our way―helping baby stay asleep no matter where life takes us. When it's time to take my daughter out, it folds easily with one hand and has an ergonomic carry handle to travel anywhere we want to go.

Life will probably never be as predictable as I'd like, but at least with our Metro stroller, I know my child will be cradled with care no matter what crosses our path.

This article is sponsored by Ergobaby. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.


It's been more than a year since Khloé Kardashian welcomed her daughter True Thompson into the world, and like a lot of new moms, Khloé didn't just learn how to to be a mom this year, she also learned how to co-parent with someone who is no longer her partner. According to the Pew Research Center, co-parenting and the likelihood that a child will spend part of their childhood living with just one parent is on the rise.

There was a ton of media attention on Khloé's relationship with True's father Tristan Thompson in her early days of motherhood, and in a new interview on the podcast "Divorce Sucks!," Khloé explained that co-parenting with someone you have a complicated relationship with isn't always easy, but when she looks at True she knows it's worth it.

"For me, Tristan and I broke up not too long ago so it's really raw," Khloé tells divorce attorney Laura Wasser on the podcast. She explains that even though it does "suck" at times, she's committed to having a good relationship with her ex because she doesn't want True to pick up on any negative energy, even at her young age.

That's why she invited Tristan to True's recent first birthday bash, even though she knew True wouldn't remember that party. "I know she's going to want to look back at all of her childhood memories like we all do," Khloé explained. "I know her dad is a great person, and I know how much he loves her and cares about her, so I want him to be there."


We totally get why being around Tristan is hard for Khloé, but it sounds like she's approaching co-parenting with a positive attitude that will benefit True in the long run. Studies have found that shared parenting is good for kids and that former couples who have "ongoing personal and emotional involvement with their former spouse" are more likely to rate their co-parenting relationship positively.

Khloé says her relationship with Tristan right now is "civilized," and hopefully it can get even better with time. As Suzanne Hayes noted in her six guiding principles for a co-parenting relationship, there's no magic bullet for moving past the painful feelings that come when a relationship ends and into a healthy co-parenting relationship, but treating your ex with respect and (non-romantic) love is a good place to start. Hayes describes it as "human-to-human, parent-to-parent, we-share-amazing-children-and-always-will love."

It's a great place to start, and it sounds like Khloé has already figured that out.

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Kim Kardashian West welcomed her fourth child into the world. The expectancy and arrival of this boy (her second child from surrogacy) has garnered much attention.

In a surrogacy pregnancy, a woman carries a pregnancy for another family and then after giving birth she relinquishes her rights of the child.

On her website, Kim wrote that she had medical complications with her previous pregnancy leading her to this decision. “I have always been really honest about my struggles with pregnancy. Preeclampsia and placenta accreta are high-risk conditions, so when I wanted to have a third baby, doctors said that it wasn't safe for my—or the baby's—health to carry on my own."

While the experience was challenging for her, “The connection with our baby came instantly and it's as if she was with us the whole time. Having a gestational carrier was so special for us and she made our dreams of expanding our family come true. We are so excited to finally welcome home our baby girl."

A Snapchat video hinted that Kim may have planned to breastfeed her third child. What she chooses to do is of course none of our business. But is has raised the very interesting question, “Wait, can you breastfeed when you use a surrogate?"


The answer is yes, you sure can! (And you can when you adopt a baby, too!)

When a women is pregnant, she begins a process called lactogenesis in which her body prepares itself to start making milk. This usually starts around the twenty week mark of pregnancy (half way through). Then, when the baby is born, the second phase of lactogenesis occurs, and milk actually starts to fill the breasts.

All of this occurs in response to hormones. When women do not carry a pregnancy, but wish to breastfeed, they can induce lactation, where they replicate the same hormonal process that happens during pregnancy.

A woman who wants to induce lactation can work with a doctor or midwife, and start taking the hormones estrogen and progesterone (which grow breast tissue)—often in the form of birth control pills—along with a medication called domperidone (which increases milk production).

Several weeks before the baby will be born, the woman stops taking the birth control pill but continues to take the domperidone to simulate the hormonal changes that would happen in a pregnancy. She'll also start pumping multiple times per day, and will likely add herbal supplements, like fenugreek and blessed thistle.

Women can also try to induce lactation without the hormones, by using pumping and herbs, it may be harder but some women feel more comfortable with that route.

Inducing lactation takes a lot of dedication—but then again, so does everything related to be a mama. It's a super personal decision, and not right for everyone.

The important thing to remember is that we need to support women and mothers through their entire journey, no matter what decisions they make about themselves and their families—whether Kardashian or the rest of us.

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