She was one of the most popular and controversial Bachelor cast members in recent seasons, and now Bekah Martinez is going to be a mom.
She made the announcement Wednesday via YouTube video and an interview with PureWow
, and the story of how Martinez and her boyfriend, Grayston Leonard reacted to the positive pregnancy test proves that, sometimes, partners can have very different feelings when they find out a baby is on the way.
"Men and women's reactions, I don't want to generalize, but I think they're very different," Martinez explains in the video.
The 23-year-old mom-to-be had been dating Leonard for three months when she found out she was pregnant (the relationship and the pregnancy were both reasons why she didn't do Bachelor in Paradise).
When Martinez found out she was expecting she was excited."It's the one thing that I've known with certainty for so long," she told PureWow
. "I've always felt sure that I want to be a mom."
Leonard, on the other hand, was a bit shocked and concerned about what the couple would need to do to prepare for a baby. "The male reaction is like very logical, very practical," Martinez explains. "I just wasn't thinking about any of that practical, logical stuff. I was just like, you know, I've wanted to be a mom my whole life. This is what I've always wanted and I don't care what the circumstances are, this is gonna work and this is my baby. That's how I've felt from the start."
While Martinez felt like a mom from the moment she got a positive test, Leonard feels his transformation from reluctant to expectant father took some more time, but he did get there. When Martinez's bump began to pop, he felt a change, and says he's ready to be the best dad he can be.
It's not uncommon for men to take more time to get excited about a pregnancy
"Women often perceive that men aren't as excited as they are because it takes longer for them to get connected since it's not in their bodies," Deborah Issokson, a licensed psychologist, previously explained to WebMD .
"So much of the pregnancy is kind of quiet until women start showing or the baby starts moving."
And while mama's hormonal changes start before we see two lines on the stick, changes to dad's hormone levels
are a bit slower.
Now that Leonard and Martinez are experiencing some pregnancy milestones together, he's getting into dad mode but the couple isn't rushing to meet any relationship milestones. A lot has happened in the seven months they've been together, and they're looking forward to slowing down and just enjoying some time with their child.
"We'll have a kid before we've been dating for a year," Leonard says in the video.
"It's a horrible idea for us to consider with all of the hormones and the stress we're experiencing," Martinez told PureWow
. "The last thing we need is to consider another commitment on top of what we're already going through...Regardless, we're bound together by sharing this little life."
Whether they choose to stay together or co-parent separately, and despite their different initial reactions, one thing is clear: Martinez and Leonard are both committed to their baby.
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