A modern lifestyle brand redefining motherhood

The Women’s March on Washington is this Saturday and there are more than 600 sister marches happening around the world, an energizing and inspiring effect of an election result that, for many of us, has been scary.

Our health care, our democratic ideals, the ethics of our institutions, the progress we’ve made to confront our country’s violent history of racism, sexism, and homophobia all may be at great risk. Marching in peaceful unity gives us the opportunity to be heard en masse, to link arms with each other, literally and figuratively, and to see how it feels to stand in solidarity with so many. I can’t imagine how powerful Saturday will be for the social activist movements going forward in 2017.

What do you do, though, if you want to be part of the resistance but you have small children, the sort that can’t be brought along to a march? What if, logistically, financially, medically, marching is simply not in the cards for you this weekend? Should you spend your Saturday forlornly pushing your kid on the playground swings, feeling guilty and disconnected? No way!

Look, I’m neither an expert in activism or in motherhood, but I care deeply about both and I believe that parenting this weekend (and anytime) need not be seen as an alternative to resisting: in fact, isn’t one an integral part of the other?

In that light, here are five ways for parents who can’t march on Saturday to remain involved in a resistance movement that is only just beginning. There are really two inaugurations this weekend: on Friday, that of a new president, and on Saturday, that of a new movement, rooted in and supported by some of the great civil rights activists of the last century. As the dust settles after the weekend, let’s show our country, ourselves, and our kids what matters to us. 

1 | Raise your kids to be kind

If you’re raising children right now, you are inextricably connected to the future of our country and planet. As Dr. Seuss said in “The Lorax,” “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot nothing is going to get better. It’s not.” Raising kind kids who care is an ESSENTIAL part of resisting hate. 

2 | Call your reps

I called my congressional rep a few weeks ago while my son was singing and clomping around in the living room and not only did it force me to speak at a deafening volume, I was easily able to convey actual panic (over one of the president-elect’s nominees AND my son’s precarious position on the arm of the couch) and keep things succinct and to the point. I also inadvertently made a congressional staffer laugh. My personal humiliation can effect the change I want to see! 

3 | Read to your kids

Reading to your kids doesn’t just make them smarter and more literate; it also engenders empathy. And it is that empathy, that understanding of what someone else is feeling, that will compel our children to create and reshape our country so that it benefits all of its citizens, not a select few.

4 | Read to yourself

Find a fascinating article about something that concerns you or that you didn’t know about, like our still segregated public schools or more evidence of climate change, and read it before bed or on your commute or while you’re sitting on a bean bag chair next to your sick toddler who won’t go to sleep unless you’re right there holding his hand.

I’m realizing lately how easy it can be for me to scroll madly through news stories, absorbing nothing but gut-wrenching terror, or to bury my head under a blanket and pretend everything is going to stay the same. A meaty piece of journalism won’t necessarily be soothing, but it does ring the alarm bells in a gentler, more thorough way, while still keeping the fight in me alive.

5 | Be good to other mothers

Often as mothers and women we define ourselves in contrast to other mothers, other women, and how we aren’t like them, and that that is a good thing. The website for The Women’s March features these words from Audre Lorde: “It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.”

So this weekend and beyond, let’s be compassionate to all the other mothers, let’s show them the depth of our hearts and see the depth of theirs so that we may join together in our fight for our rights as people.

One more quote to leave you with, this time, from Alice Walker: “Yes, Mother. I can see you are flawed. You have not hidden it. That is your greatest gift to me.”

Who said motherhood doesn't come with a manual?

Subscribe to get inspiration and super helpful ideas to rock your #momlife. Motherhood looks amazing on you.

Already a subscriber? Log in here.

We've had some struggles, you and me. In my teens, we were just getting to know each other. It was a rocky road at times, like when people referred to you as "big boned." I was learning how to properly fuel you by giving you the right foods. How to be active, to keep you strong and in good shape. I wish I knew then what I do now about you and what a true blessing you are. But that's something that has come with the gift of motherhood.

In my 20's, we became more well-acquainted. I knew how to care for you. After I got engaged, we worked so hard together to get into "wedding shape." And, looking back now, I totally took that six pack—okay, four pack—for granted. (But I have the pictures to prove it.)

Now that I'm in my 30's (how did my 30's happen so fast, btw?) with two kids, I'm coming to terms with my new postpartum body.

Keep reading... Show less

If there are two things a mama is guaranteed to love, it's Target plus adorable and functional baby products. Target's exclusive baby brand Cloud Island has been a favorite destination for cute and affordable baby clothing and décor for nearly two years and because of that success, they're now expanding into baby essentials. 🙌

The new collection features 30 affordable products starting at $0.99 and going up to $21.99 with most items priced under $10—that's about 30-40% less expensive than other products in the market. Mamas can now enjoy adding diapers, wipes, feeding products and toiletries to their cart alongside clothing and accessories from a brand they already know and love.

The best part? The Target team has ensured that the affordability factor doesn't cut down on durability by working with hundreds of parents to create and test the collection. The wipes are ultra-thick and made with 99% water and plant-based ingredients, while the toiletries are dermatologist-approved. With a Tri-Wrap fold, the diapers offer 12-hour leak protection and a snug fit so parents don't have to sacrifice safety or functionality.

So when can you start shopping? Starting on January 20, customers can shop the collection across all stores and online. We can't wait to see how this beloved brand expands in the future.

Motherly is your daily #momlife manual; we are here to help you easily find the best, most beautiful products for your life that actually work. We share what we love—and we may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.

You might also like:

Many people experience the "winter blues," which are often worst in northern climates from November to March, when people have less access to sunlight, the outdoors and their communities. Another 4% develops Seasonal Affective Disorder, which is a form of clinical depression that often requires formal treatment.

If you have the winter blues, you may feel “blah," sad, tired, anxious or be in a worse mood than usual. You may struggle with overeating, loss of libido, work or sleep issues. But fear not—it is possible to find your joy in the winter, mama.

Here are eight ways to feel better:

1. Take a walk

Research has shown that walking on your lunch break just three times per week can reduce tension, relax you and improve your enthusiasm. If you are working from 9 to 5, the only window you have to access natural sunlight may be your lunch hour, so head outside for a 20 minute brisk but energizing walk!

If you are home, bundle up with your kids midday—when the weather is often warmest—and play in the snow, go for a short walk, play soccer, race each other, or do something else to burn energy and keep you all warm. If you dress for the weather, you'll all feel refreshed after some fresh air.

2. Embrace light

Research suggests that a full-spectrum light box or lamp, which mimics sunlight, can significantly improve the symptoms of the winter blues and has a similar effect to an antidepressant. Bright light at a certain time every day activates a part of the brain that can help restore normal circadian rhythms. While light treatment may not be beneficial for everyone (such as people who have bipolar disorder), it may be a beneficial tool for some.

3. Plan a winter trip

It may be helpful to plan a getaway for January or February. Plan to take it very easy, as one research study found that passive vacation activities, including relaxing, "savoring," and sleeping had greater effects on health and well-being than other activities. Engaging in passive activities on vacation also makes it more likely that your health and well-being will remain improved for a longer duration after you go back to work.

Don't overschedule your trip. Relax at a beach, a pool, or a cabin instead of waiting in long roller coaster lines or visiting packed museums. Consider visiting or traveling with family to help with child care, build quiet time into your vacation routine, and build in a day of rest, recovery, and laundry catch-up when you return.

4. Give in to being cozy

Sometimes people mistake the natural slowness of winter as a problem within themselves. By making a concerted effort to savor the slowness, rest and retreat that complement winter, you can see your reduction in activity as a natural and needed phase.

Research suggests that naps help you release stress. Other research suggests that when your brain has time to rest, be idle, and daydream, you are better able to engage in "active, internally focused psychosocial mental processing," which is important for socioemotional health.

Make a "cozy basket" filled with your favorite DVDs, bubble bath or Epsom salts, lemon balm tea (which is great for “blues,") or chamomile tea (which is calming and comforting), citrus oils (which are good for boosting mood), a blanket or a favorite book or two. If you start to feel the blues, treat yourself.

If your child is napping or having quiet time in the early afternoon, rest for a full 30 minutes instead of racing around doing chores. If you're at work, keep a few mood-boosting items (like lavender spray, tea, lotion, or upbeat music) nearby and work them into your day. If you can't use them at work, claim the first 30 minutes after your kids are asleep to nurture yourself and re-energize before you tackle dishes, laundry, or other chores.

5. See your friends

Because of the complex demands of modern life, it can be hard to see or keep up with friends or family. The winter can make it even harder. While you interact with your kids throughout the day, human interaction with other adults (not just through social media!) can act as a protective layer to keep the winter blues at bay.

Plan a monthly dinner with friends, go on a monthly date night if you have a partner, go to a book club, get a drink after work with a coworker, visit a friend on Sunday nights, or plan get-togethers with extended family. Research suggests that social interactions are significantly related to well-being.

Realize that given most families' packed schedules, you may need to consistently take the lead in bringing people together. Your friends will probably thank you, too.

6. Get (at least) 10 minutes of fresh air

A number of research studies have shown positive effects of nature on well-being, including mental restoration, immune health, and memory. It works wonders for your mood to get outside in winter, even if it's just for 10 minutes 2 to 3 times per week. You might walk, snowshoe, shovel, go sledding or go ice-skating. If you can't get outside, you might try these specific yoga poses for the winter blues.

7. Add a ritual

Adding a ritual to your winter, such as movie night, game night, hot chocolate after playing outside, homemade soup on Sundays, or visiting with a different friend every Saturday morning for breakfast, can add beauty and flow to the seemingly long months of winter. Research has suggested that family rituals and traditions, such as Sunday dinner, provide times for togetherness and strengthening relationships.

8. Talk to a professional

Counseling, which helps you identify the connections between your thoughts, feelings and behaviors, can be extremely helpful for the winter blues (especially when you are also experiencing anxiety or stress). A counselor can assist you with identifying and honoring feelings, replacing negative messages with positive ones, or shifting behaviors. A counselor may also help you indulge into winter as a time of retreat, slowness, planning, and reflecting. You may choose to use the winter to get clear on what you'd like to manifest in spring.

The opposite of the winter blues is not the absence of the winter blues—it's taking great pleasure in the unique contribution of a time of cold, darkness, retreat, planning, reflecting, being cozy and hibernating. Nurturing yourself and your relationships can help you move toward winter joy.

Weary mama,

You are incredibly strong. You are so very capable.

Keep reading... Show less
Motherly provides information of a general nature and is designed for educational purposes only. This site does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.Your use of the site indicates your agreement to be bound by our  Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. Information on our advertising guidelines can be found here.