Anyone who has been through it knows miscarriage is hard. And while most things get easier with experience, pregnancy loss is definitely the exception to that rule.

Married at First Sight star Jamie Otis knows that it doesn’t hurt any less the second or third time a mama suffers a loss.

Otis (who married her husband Doug Hehner on season one of Married at First Sight) Otis) lost her first pregnancy ( a son the couple named Johnathan) at 17 weeks in 2016. The next year, the couple welcomed their daughter, Henley Grace. Then, in 2018 Otis got a positive test that led to a chemical pregnancy.

And on Friday Otis (who announced another pregnancy in late 2018) opened up about how she is now grieving yet another loss.

Her story proves that the journey to parenthood isn’t easy for everyone and that mamas who are feeling the loneliness that comes after heartbreak are so not alone.

“I’m devastated. We’ve had a ‘failed miscarriage.’ Our baby formed and there was an amniotic sac, but while the amniotic sac continued to grow the baby stopped at some point,” Otis wrote on Instagram.

data-instgrm-captioned data-instgrm-version=”4″ style=” background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:658px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% – 2px); width:calc(100% – 2px);”>

 

 

 

 

 

She went on to explain that her doctor gave her three options after breaking the bad news. She was told she could wait and see if her body would eventually complete the miscarriage, or she could either go to the hospital for a D&C (a medical procedure to clear the uterine lining) or take a medication that could help her body speed up the process.

Otis chose to take the medication and spend some time resting with her daughter, who Otis calls her “rainbow baby”.

“I was wondering when and if the medication would work since I was further along so I knew it wasn’t guaranteed to work,” Otis wrote in a follow-up post Saturday.

“Around 7pm I began getting the most sharp, excruciating pains all throughout my belly and my back,” she explained, noting that her husband supported her through every moment of the process.

 

data-instgrm-captioned data-instgrm-version=”4″ style=” background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:658px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% – 2px); width:calc(100% – 2px);”>

 

 

 

 

 

Otis is trying her best to stay positive and is very appreciative of all the support she has received from Instagram followers over the weekend.

In a previous Instagram post on the anniversary of Johnathan’s due date, Otis offered explained that 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in a loss, and that “the pain is excruciating”. To her fellow mothers going through their own pain, this mama who knows it all too well chose her words carefully: “I won’t say everything happens for a reason [because] I remember secretly hating it every time someone said that to me,” she wrote.

“But what I will say is this: Even though you’re going through some of the darkest days of your life, please know the storm doesn’t come without leaving a rainbow at the end.”

Otis is one strong mama. We know you can get through this Jamie, and we’re so grateful to you for sharing your story. You are not alone.