When it comes to the actual chances of getting pregnant, there’s a lot of misconceptions out there. Let’s get real for a second: That story so many of us have heard about someone’s best friend’s aunt’s boss’s daughter getting pregnant after only having sex one time, standing up, in the shower!? The chances of that being you when you decide to start trying for a baby is slim. Trying to conceive (or TTC) can be a bit frustrating when it feels like the whole world is posting monthly maternity updates on Instagram and making adorable “I’m pregnant” reels on TikTok. Social media can really skew our expectations. Plus, those sex-ed classes in high school may have left you with more questions than answers regarding how to actually get pregnant. 

So, for all the beautiful humans out there hoping to get a positive pregnancy test this month, here’s what a fertility expert has to say about the real chances of getting pregnant in a given month, factors that affect the ability to conceive and science-based ways to boost your chances. 

Related: 5 ways to optimize your health for pregnancy, according to an OB-GYN

The odds of getting pregnant may be lower than you think

Dr. Temeka Zore, MD, the director of fertility preservation at Spring Fertility in San Francisco confirms this, reporting that “the chance of pregnancy each month is approximately 20% to 25% for a healthy, fertile couple where the female partner is less than 30,” which, in her experience, surprises many people in being lower than expected.  So for those of us who are surprised by these odds, we’re in good company. 

Dr. Zore also tells us that, “at 35, the chance of pregnancy is approximately 10% to 15% per month and over age 40, the chance of pregnancy is less than 5% per month.” 

Unfortunately, as the age of the female partner increases, the quality of the female’s eggs decreases, resulting in lower fertility rates. The truth here is that our eggs get old before WE get old, at least according to societal standards. Biologically, our bodies are intended to procreate at relatively young ages.  So while society certainly has not started calling people at the age of 35 “old,” our eggs are telling a different story.

Although we can’t slow down the wheels of time, we do have options these days. For people who think they would like to have children at some point but are not quite ready now, fertility preservation in the form of egg and embryo freezing is an option. 

Related: No, nothing happens to your eggs the day you turn 35

How to increase your chances of getting pregnant

Dr. Zore does confirm that age of the female partner is “the number one factor that impacts chances of conceiving each month.”  But since none of us want to feel defeated by the fact that our eggs are apparently racing toward AARP status, Dr. Zore highlights several additional factors that have the potential to reduce fertility… and prompt an earlier fertility specialist consultation. 

Other factors that may affect fertility

Irregular or absent periods

A predictable, regular cycle is a good indicator that a person’s hormones are behaving, and that they are most likely ovulating. Unpredictable, erratic or absent periods can provide clues to hormonal or sometimes anatomical problems that can affect the ability to get pregnant. 

A known uterine fibroid or endometrial polyp

The inside wall of the uterus is intended to be a smooth, unobstructed surface on which a fertilized egg can easily implant. The presence of a growth along the uterine wall (a fibroid or polyp) can prevent that hopeful little maybe-baby from making a home where it needs to. 

Known male factor concerns

Think: Known sperm problems or tubal disease. Dr. Laura Bishop, OBGYN from Columbia University states that male factors contributing to infertility are identified as the cause of a couple’s difficulty conceiving about one-third of the time. 

Related: Everything you need to know about getting pregnant

How to take action (including that kind of action)

Raise your hand if you’re excited about your period. No? Nobody? 

We get it. But the most actionable piece of advice for improving the odds of getting pregnant? “Understanding your menstrual cycle and when you ovulate to better time intercourse around your most fertile days,” says Dr. Zore. So, I say again, raise your hand if you’re excited about your period! 

1. Start tracking

To really dig into menstrual tracking for the sake of TTC, monitoring for ovulation is essential. Dr. Zore recommends either tracking the signs and symptoms that occur during ovulation (think cervical mucus, basal body temperature, and cervical position, described beautifully here) or using ovulation predictor kits like these, or both! 

2. Plot out your prime time to get busy

On the day of likely ovulation, it’s time to have sex! The best times to have sex for conception are the day of suspected ovulation (because of symptoms or a positive ovulation predictor test) and the next two days.  

3. Use the right lube

A word of caution: Not all lubricants are TTC-friendly. Some lubes are harmful to sperm, potentially reducing the likelihood of conception during those sex sessions. Take a few moments to check ingredients. Dr. Zore recommends that we “stick to those that contain a hydroxyethyl cellulose base.” (We like The Lube from Natalist.)

4. Keep up with wellness

Of course, optimizing health is always recommended. Generally speaking, up your fruit and veggie intake, decrease your caffeine and alcohol intake and don’t smoke. Most know that smoking during pregnancy is considered harmful, but did you know that smoking can reduce egg quality as well as impact the health of sperm? We need healthy little eggs and strong swimmers to achieve the goal here, so taking steps to quit smoking will earn you a giant high-five from your reproductive organs.

Related: A nutritionist’s guide to the best foods for pregnancy, from the early days to the third trimester

Ritual prenatal vitamin

Ritual

Essential Prenatal

•

$39

Ritual’s prenatal is built on an “everything you need, nothing you don’t” philosophy. Each of the delayed-release capsules are easy to absorb and contain just 12 essential nutrients including methylated B vitamins, bioavailable iron and 350 mg of DHA, an omega-3 fatty acid that’s necessary for fetal brain and eye development. And since the best vitamins are the ones you’ll actually want to take, these come with a clever citrus tab inside the bottle to make the whole experience even better.

Read more about it here.

SHOP

A note from Motherly: Chances of getting pregnant

We know this feels like a lot of information. For something our bodies were apparently designed to do, a lot of thought and planning can be necessary when it comes to baby-making. It can be stressful to plan for conception, and it can really freak us out when we don’t get pregnant as quickly as we would like to. But early on in the journey of TTC, the best things to do are to practice healthy habits, get to know your body and have sex. When you’re ready to take it to the next level, try just one or two of the suggestions above so you don’t get overwhelmed. 

Understanding the likelihood of getting pregnant involves more than just knowing the numbers. It’s about equipping yourself with the knowledge and tools necessary to navigate the journey with confidence. The process of trying to conceive is unique for every individual and couple, and while the odds of getting pregnant can provide a statistical perspective, your personal journey is much more than a set of probabilities.

To further empower yourself on this journey, consider the importance of a supportive environment, both emotionally and physically. Surround yourself with positive influences, seek advice and stories from those who’ve been through similar experiences, and remember that every journey to parenthood is unique. Engaging in open conversations with your partner and healthcare provider about your plans and concerns can also provide clarity and reassurance.

In addition, staying informed about the latest research and recommendations for fertility health can offer new avenues to explore. Whether it’s considering the timing of intercourse, understanding the role of lifestyle choices in fertility, or exploring medical interventions if necessary, each step you take is progress toward your goal.

The narrative around getting pregnant is filled with personal stories, scientific insights, and sometimes, unexpected challenges. But with each piece of knowledge gained, you’re better equipped to make informed decisions that align with your desires and circumstances. Remember, the question of “what are the chances of getting pregnant?” is deeply personal, and finding answers that resonate with your journey is a step towards realizing your dreams of parenthood.

If you want to learn more about the chances of getting pregnant visit the National Library of Science.

FAQ: Understanding the Chances of Getting Pregnant

What are the average chances of getting pregnant each month?

The average chances of a healthy, fertile couple conceiving each month is about 20% to 25% if the female partner is under 30 years old. This percentage decreases as the woman ages, with a noted decrease to 10% to 15% by the age of 35 and less than 5% after the age of 40.

How does age affect the chances of getting pregnant?

Age significantly affects fertility due to the decrease in egg quality and quantity as a woman ages. Women are born with all the eggs they will ever have, and the number and health of these eggs decline over time, reducing the chances of conception as age increases.

Can lifestyle choices impact fertility?

Yes, lifestyle choices such as smoking, excessive alcohol consumption, poor diet, and high stress can negatively impact fertility in both men and women. Healthy lifestyle choices can improve the chances of conceiving.

How long should couples try to conceive before seeking medical advice?

It’s recommended that couples under the age of 35 try to conceive for one year before seeking medical advice. For couples where the woman is over 35, seeking help after six months of trying is advisable due to the decrease in fertility associated with age.

Does having sex more frequently increase the chances of getting pregnant?

Having sex every other day around the time of ovulation increases the chances of conception. This frequency ensures that sperm are available in the fallopian tubes when an egg is released.

What role does ovulation tracking play in getting pregnant?

Ovulation tracking helps identify the most fertile days in a woman’s cycle, which can significantly increase the chances of conception when timed with intercourse. Methods include monitoring basal body temperature, observing changes in cervical mucus, and using ovulation predictor kits.

Can certain positions during sex increase the chances of getting pregnant?

While there’s no conclusive scientific evidence that certain positions increase the likelihood of conception, it’s generally recommended to choose positions that allow for deep penetration. This is thought to help sperm get closer to the cervix.

How important is diet in improving fertility?

A balanced diet rich in vitamins and minerals can improve fertility in both men and women. For women, foods high in folic acid, omega-3 fatty acids, and antioxidants are beneficial, while for men, foods that improve sperm quality and count, such as those rich in zinc and vitamin C, are recommended.

Featured expert

Dr. Temeka Zore, MD, board-certified OB/GYN and fellowship-trained Reproductive and Infertility Specialist (REI). Dr. Zore is the director of fertility preservation at Spring Fertility in San Francisco. She completed her medical degree at Indiana University School of Medicine and her fertility fellowship at UCLA. She is passionate about reproductive health education for women and about fertility preservation.

A version of this story was published January 21, 2022. It has been updated.