The reality is, there is no perfect way to respond. It is tricky terrain. But here are some thoughts I encourage you to consider before sharing your words of support.
It is physically horrible, emotionally draining, mentally unbearable, and turns your world upside down. But other mamas in my life (including my own mother) who opened up to me and told me about their experiences demonstrated a breathtaking sense of bravery and resilience.
I sobbed. Because I wanted this baby. Because my body hurt. Because I went through two months of pregnancy for nothing.
As many as one in four women trying to get pregnant will have a miscarriage—and yet I had no idea it was that common. You don't hear much about miscarriages until it happens to you or someone close enough who may share it with you.
It's okay to grieve, mama.
At 20 weeks of pregnancy, my baby didn't make it.
If you need someone to sit with you and your sadness, tell me. I will be there.