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Why one-size-fits-all child discipline doesn’t work—and what does

When you honor your child’s true nature, discipline takes on another look because it’s supportive to your children.

Why one-size-fits-all child discipline doesn’t work—and what does

Does all the discipline advice out there seem impossible?


You’re supposed to do this. Or you’re not supposed to do that.

And here’s the kicker: when your child is acting up and you try the latest advice, it just doesn’t work the way it’s supposed to. So what are you doing wrong?

The truth is, most classic parenting approaches don’t work for a lot of children.

Each child is unique. So a one-size-fits-all approach just creates frustration. Stop making this simple mistake and you’ll start eliminating frustration today.

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The biggest discipline mistake

The biggest mistake is disciplining a child contrary to their nature.

When we approach children contrary to their nature, they often react negatively. Adults then react to a child’s negative reaction with disciplinary tactics to try and get them to comply. They just go around and around in a cycle of frustration that doesn’t work.

When you honor your child’s true nature, discipline takes on another look because it’s supportive to your children. They are more cooperative and responsive to discipline that honors them.

What do I mean discipline them true to their nature?

Each child is born into this world with a unique nature and level of energy. In my work with children, I have discovered 4 basic types of children who express similar tendencies in their body language, behavior, and personality:

—The Fun-loving Type 1 Child: Naturally buoyant and random, these children have a gift for ideas.

—The Sensitive Type 2 Child: Naturally subdued and connected, these children gather details and make plans.

—The Determined Type 3 Child: Naturally swift and active, these children push things forward.

—The More Serious Type 4 Child: Naturally logical and analytical, these children perfect the world around them.

As a parent, you have an intuitive understanding of your child. These 4 Types are just a tool to help you understand your children’s tendencies even more clearly.

Knowing your child’s type will help you create a more mutually cooperative relationship.

Discipline for different Types of children

Let’s look at a typical parenting approach: Time Out.

A fun-loving Type 1 child as described in The Child Whisperer system is naturally social. A long, solitary time-out for this child feels like a day of torture. Given their high energy, they’re not likely to just sit still anyway.

A more serious Type 4 child has a still, reflective nature. Their movement is lower. In fact, if you send a Type 4 to time-out (especially if it’s in their room), it may actually feel like a reward.

If you need to discipline a child, do it in a way that honors their true nature…

—Turn cooperation into a game for a fun-loving Type 1 child.

—Speak gently and reassure a sensitive Type 2 child.

—Give that determined Type 3 child a motivating challenge.

—Make discipline a private experience for a more serious Type 4 child.

All 4 types of children will respond well when their needs are met and voices heard.

Skip the advice—customize your parenting

Stop trying to sort through all the advice of what you should do and start doing what your child’s already telling you will work.


This article comes from Carol Tuttle, author of the best-selling book, The Child Whisperer. Carol’s book helps parents understand their children on a deep level sot he whole family experiences more cooperation.

Read the book or discover more about the 4 Types of children here.


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14 outdoor toys your kids will want to play with beyond summer

They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

With Labor day weekend in the rearview and back-to-school in full swing, most parents are fresh out of boxes to check on their "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in summer-only toys. So with that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play. Even better, they're Montessori-friendly and largely open-ended so your kids can get a ton of use out of them.

From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

Meadow ring toss game

Plan Toys meadow ring toss game

Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.

$30

Balance board

Plan Toys balance board

Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!

$75

Detective set

Plan Toys detective setDetective Set

This set has everything your little detective needs to solve whatever mystery they might encounter: an eye glasses, walkie-talkie, camera, a red lens, a periscope and a bag. Neighborhood watch? Watch out.

$40

Wooden doll stroller

Janod wooden doll strollerWooden Doll Stroller

Take their charges on a stroll around the block with this classic doll stroller. With the same versatility they're used to in their own ride, this heirloom quality carriage allows their doll or stuffy to face them or face the world.

$120

Sand play set

Plan Toys sand set

Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.

$30

Water play set

Plan Toys water play set

Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.

$100

Mini golf set

Plan Toys mini golf set

Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.

$40

Vintage scooter balance bike

Janod retro scooter balance bike

Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.

$121

Wooden rocking pegasus

plan toys wooden rocking pegasus

Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.

$100

Croquet set

Plan Toys croquet set

The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.

$45

Wooden digital camera

fathers factory wooden digital camera

Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.

$179

Wooden bulldozer toy

plan toys wooden bulldozer toy

Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.

$100

Pull-along hippo

janod toys pull along hippo toy

There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.

$33

Baby forest fox ride-on

janod toys baby fox ride on

Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.

$88

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