Like basically everyone on earth, I couldn’t wait for 2020 to be over. A year that threw all our plans, safety nets, resolutions in the trash and made us figure out life all over again while trying not to panic. A year that brought my family two new babies whom we love dearly, but was filled with sadness and sorrow for all of those we lost. A year that proved to us how ill-equipped parents really are, how we fail families—especially working parents—over and over again.

Now here we are, in a brand new year. And instead of making big plans, career goals and a ton of resolutions, I’m simply asking for 2021 to be as predictable as possible.

I want winter to mean a lot of fun in the snow for my children. To watch a new President be inaugurated without even more drama. To allow first responders to get their vaccine so maybe (maybe?) one day we can all stop wearing masks. I want to go into award season excited about all the shows I might attempt to binge-watch at some point (fully knowing that I will never actually finish most of the shows).

I want spring to roll around and not shock the world. I want flowers to bloom, peel off layers of clothing that will be too small for my children to wear next winter and purge purge purge. I want to celebrate my family’s birthdays (yes, they all fall within two weeks of each other), for my babies to try their first cake and my toddler to sing happy birthday to everyone. I want to enjoy some sunlight on my face and feel that energy that only spring brings.

I want summer to mean we play outside all day long. Hopefully not in a bubble, but probably still wearing masks just in case. I want my family to be vaccinated so we can see my elderly parents again. I want summer sunsets, camping outside, tan lines and the smell of SPF everywhere. Maybe my kids will go back to school in person, maybe not, but I want them to be excited about going back to school regardless, to keep learning and growing as individuals.

I want fall to mean pumpkins and Halloween, layered sweaters and snuggles with my kids. I want to (hopefully) be making plans for the holidays, if we are lucky we’ll get to see our family for the first time since March 2020.

I know a lot of things won’t change this year. We will still be wearing masks until everyone is safely vaccinated. Social distance learning will still be a thing, making working parents continue to juggle in their new normal. Large gatherings will probably not be happening (or at least for us, because the idea of hundreds of people right now gives me absolute anxiety). But all I want is to know what’s coming, to not be left completely and utterly unprepared and panicked like I was in 2020.

So please, 2021, can you be absolutely monotonously predictable?