Menu

Now is the time for your comeback, mama

Motherhood makes us stronger, therefore that comeback will be full of strength, passion and beauty.

Now is the time for your comeback, mama

I love the watching the Grammy’s—it is one of my favorite award shows. I love the music and adore the fashion.


So when I sat down with a bowl of popcorn to enjoy my annual night of awesomeness I did not expect to find myself crying like baby. Adele’s 2017 acceptance speech for Album of the year was incredible. She was authentic and real when she told the world she felt like she had lost herself when she became a mother.

Adele.

Lost.

Herself.

A Grammy winning, angel singing, gorgeous rockstar lost a bit of herself to motherhood. I immediately related with her and couldn’t help but cry. Here she was with a Grammy in hand proving how great a comeback after motherhood could be.

FEATURED VIDEO

5 years ago I lost myself, too.

I was a first time mom and consumed with everything baby.

I checked feeding schedules, pumped to encourage supply, knew all the stages of poop and I put myself on the back burner.

This was a far cry from the girl I was before I became mom. I used to be outgoing and funny. I was living in Italy traveling as much as I could. I was working with fun great people and spending my Sundays in Venice with my husband talking about art and architecture. And then. . .

It almost a year into motherhood until I realized what was happening. I was wearing a sweater covered in spit up, couldn’t remember the last day I showered and hadn’t left the house in a few days. I stood there, for a solid minute just looking at myself in the mirror.

I still remember saying, “What happened to me?”

That night I asked my husband if he noticed a difference. He said one thing that brought me right out of my motherhood fog. “I miss you,” he said.

I agreed.

Before baby, I had been to be laid back and easy going and all of sudden I became unforgiving and dictatorial about how to properly clean a bottle.

“I miss me too,” I confessed to him—with a deep sense of commitment to finding the new me.

That weekend I started small. I packed my carrier, showered and left the house. We headed to the train and showed our little bambina Venice, Italy. I felt accomplished by not talking about diapers for a whole day. I came home from that day trip feeling better and with a little spring in my step.

So, from that day on I actively tried to figure out what kind of mom I wanted to be—rather than letting motherhood be something that just happened to me.

Mother is always evolving because kids are always growing and as soon as you get use to one thing, life changes. But I am making a conscious effort to include the things I love into my motherhood style. I also give myself grace for when I fall into losing myself to motherhood here and there.

If you’re like me and relate to Adele losing herself to motherhood, know that the new you can be just a fresh perspective—a new horizon—away.

Motherhood changes our lives, but it doesn’t have to take our lives from us.

If Adele can lose herself despite her global career than it can truly happen to anyone.

So my hope is this: That all of us moms who have lost ourselves to motherhood can get a Grammy worthy comeback.

Remember—Motherhood makes us stronger, therefore that comeback will be full of strength, passion and beauty.

If you find yourself not able to recognize that girl in the mirror, remember that she’s still in there. You are the only one who can find her again. Take a deep breath and start your comeback today. You will like the new you, I’m sure of it.

Join Motherly

In This Article

    You will always be their safe space, mama

    You are their haven. Their harbor. Their sanctuary, their peace. You are comfort. Deep breaths. Hugs and back rubs. You're a resting place, a nightmare chaser, a healer. You are the calm within their storm. You are their mother.

    To your child, you are safety. You are security. You are where (out of anyone or any place), they can come undone. Where they can let it all out, let it all go. Where they meltdown, break down, scream, cry, push.

    Where they can say—"I AM NOT OKAY!"

    Where they can totally lose it. Without judgment or fear or shame.

    Because they know you'll listen. They know you'll hear them. That you will help piece the mess back together.

    Keep reading Show less
    Life

    It’s science: Vacations make your kids happy long after they’re over

    Whether you're planning a quick trip to the lake or flying the fam to a resort, the results are the same: A happier, more connected family.

    Whether you're looking for hotels or a rental home for a safe family getaway, or just punching in your credit card number to reserve a spot in a campground a couple of states over, the cost of vacation plans can make a mom wince. And while price is definitely something to consider when planning a family vacation, science suggests we should consider these trips—and their benefits—priceless.

    Research indicates that family vacations are essential. They make our, kids (and us) happier and build bonds and memories.

    Keep reading Show less
    News

    100 unusual + surprising baby name ideas

    From Adelia to Ziggy.

    Our list of 100 baby names that should be on everyone's list this year includes more choices than in the past of names that are obscure and surprising. That's because there are so many more unusual baby names coming into widespread use and baby namers have become a lot more adventurous.

    Expectant parents do not need to be told to move beyond Jennifer and Jason. Their thinking about names has evolved to the point that the most useful thing we can do is offer a large menu of intriguing choices.

    Here are our picks for the 100 best surprising + unusual baby names now.


    Keep reading Show less
    Learn + Play