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My daughter, there's so much more to you than being 'pretty'

The weight of the question was heavy and the answer far too complex.

My daughter, there's so much more to you than being 'pretty'

“Mommy, am I pretty?" asked my mousy-haired, keen-eyed and kind-hearted 5-year-old. She was shoving her over-sized glasses up the bridge of her tiny nose when she caught a glimpse of herself in the bathroom mirror, the one that I've always thought she was too short to see.

Her question: “Mommy, am I pretty?" immobilized me. It hung in the air on a busy school morning, amidst a flurry of lunch-packing and shoe-tying. The weight of her question hit my heart like Thor's Hammer, shattering ribs and going straight for the kill.

"Mommy, am I pretty?"

"Little Bug, you are so much more than pretty. You're kind. You're clever. Your heart shines like gold in the sun, and your smile warms up the world."

"But am I pretty?" She has this look. In it I see a reflection of myself when I'm frustrated. It's the same look that I'm certain my own mother saw regularly. It disarms me.

"Why are you asking?"

"Because I have to be pretty."

The world stopped. The world's barbs suddenly started to chip away at the stronghold I thought I'd created. This very stronghold was designed to guard her from the expectations that a girl's value was in what she wore and the way she smiled.

"Mommy, please. Tell me that I'm pretty."

I get down on my knees, still knowing that time can't stand still for these deep talks, and that school starts soon so her jacket has to be zipped up and her backpack has to sit comfy. "Little Bug, you are beautiful. You are beautiful because of all that I know you can do. You are strong, and funny, and smart. Yes, you are pretty. But that's not the most important thing."

"But a boy said it was."

Motherly fear shifted on its axis, morphing into righteous fury that had to be swallowed because my daughter is five and does not understand words like "patriarchy." This faceless boy suddenly looked like every man who's ever commented on my appearance as if it's the only thing I possess that they value. His face became the face of every man who has said pretty is all I could offer.

"Listen to me, Bug. The next time a boy says it's important that you're pretty, you ask him if he thinks his mama is pretty. Then you ask him if she is a better mama because of it."

"You're a good mama," she says. "And I say that before I say you are pretty." The epiphany was visible. "You are more than pretty, mommy! You're a good mama! And I am a smart girl!"

We leave home. We leave shelter and expose ourselves to the world for another day. I choose not to wear makeup, and I let my brilliant girl wear her favorite ripped jeans. I would have gleefully let her shout, "Forget the patriarchy!" if she knew the weight of those words. Instead, we listen to the Muppets sing their silly songs, and went over her letters and spelling before finally getting to school.

School: the place where I hope she learns that her mind and heart are what matter the most.

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These are only the vitamins I give my children and here's why

It's hard to say who loves these more—my kids or me.

When I became a mama five years ago, I didn't put too much thought into whether my son was getting the right vitamins and minerals. From breastfeeding to steaming and pureeing his first bites of solid food, I was confident I was giving him everything to support his growth and development.

But then the toddler years—and the suddenly picky palate that accompanied them—came along. Between that challenge and two additional children in the mix… well, I knew my oldest son's eating plan was falling short in some vitamin and mineral categories.

I also knew how quickly he was growing, so I wanted to make sure he was getting the nutrients he needed (even on those days when he said "no, thank you" to any veggie I offered).

So when I discovered the new line of children's supplements from Nature's Way®, it felt like a serious weight off my chest. Thanks to supplements that support my children's musculoskeletal growth, their brain function, their immune systems, their eyes and more, I'm taken back to that simpler time when I was so confident my kids' vitamin needs were met.*

It wasn't just the variety of supplements offered by Nature's Way that won me over: As a vegetarian mama, I'm the picky one in the family when it comes to scanning labels and making sure they meet our standards. The trick is that most gummy vitamins are made with gelatin, which is not vegetarian friendly.

But just like the other offerings from Nature's Way that I've already come to know and love, the children's supplement line is held to a high standard. That means there's no high-fructose corn syrup, gelatin or common allergens to be found in the supplements. The best part? My two oldest kids ensure we never miss their daily vitamins—they are so in love with the gummy flavors, which include tropical fruit punch, lemonade and wild berry.


Nature's Way Kids Mulitvitamin


Meanwhile, my pharmacist husband has different criteria when evaluating supplements, especially when it comes to those for our kids. He appreciates the variety of options from Nature's Way, which gives us the ability to rotate the vitamins based on our kids' daily needs. By keeping various children's supplements from Nature's Way on hand, I can customize a regimen to suit my kids' individual requirements.

Of course, high-quality products often come at a higher price point. But (to my immense gratitude!) that isn't the case with Nature's Way, which retails for a competitive value when compared to the other items on the shelf.

Like all mamas, my chief concern is supporting my children's health in any way I can. While I see evidence of their growth every time I pack away clothes they've outgrown, I know there is much more growth that doesn't meet the eye. That's why, for my oldest son, I like stacking the Brain Builder gummy with the Growing Bones & Muscles gummy and the Happy & Healthy Multi. My 3-year-old also enjoys getting her own mix to include the Healthy Eyes gummy. And both of my older kids are quick to request the Tummy Soothe tablet when something isn't sitting right in their stomachs.* And I'll admit it: I've tried it myself and the berry blast flavor really is tasty!

Although my current phase of motherhood may not be as "simple" as it once was, there is so much to appreciate about it—like watching my kids play and sing and create with their incredible imaginations. Along the way, I've eased up on some of my need for control, but it does help to have this range of supplements in my motherhood tool kit. So while I may not be able to convince my son to try kale, having the Nature's Way supplements on hand means I do know he's right on track.*These statements have not been evaluated by the Food & Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.


This article was sponsored by Nature's Way. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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