Menu

The best massage ever: 5 tips for your partner

Show your partner the proper technique, lie on your side and #treatyoself mama. You deserve it.

The best massage ever: 5 tips for your partner

Pregnancy is a joyful time of transition for the mama-to-be, but it can be stressful as well. Massage promotes general well-being throughout your pregnancy by offering both physical and emotional benefits to support you as your body nurtures and cares for your baby.


Massage can help:

  • Alleviate many of the normal discomforts of pregnancy, such as backache, stiff neck, leg cramps, headaches and sore, swollen feet.
  • Relieve depression or anxiety caused by hormonal changes.
  • Circulation, which in turn keeps hand numbness and blood pressure in check.
  • Soothe and relax the nervous system, which helps you sleep more deeply.
  • During birth as a comfort measure, and after birth to ease postpartum stress.
  • To enhance deeper breathing and relieve uncomfortable congestion in the nose and sinuses.

Below are five tips you can share with your partner so he can give you a prenatal massage at home, anytime. Turn this article over to him...

Husbands, follow these 5 tips to give your wives stress-relieving, muscle-relaxing, happiness-inducing prenatal massages at home.


1. Offer

The very best start is to offer your wife a massage. The gesture itself is almost enough to relax and ease her body!

It doesn’t take much, as long as the touch is gentle and coming from a loving place. She will reap numerous benefits from the massage, and it shows that you support her and that you’re being attentive to her needs.

Bonus: It promotes healthy relationship bonding!

2. Comfort

Make sure your wife is lying comfortably on her side while supported by pillows, which is best for safety and comfort. She should have a pillow under her head to relieve tension on the neck, one under her belly (depending on how far along she is) and one under her knee/leg to keep her hip in line with her body. This makes it easiest to target the whole back, neck and head.

Sitting upright or reclined in a cozy chair, couch or recliner with her legs and feet elevated is also a good position. Make sure to place a pillow under her lower back to support the curve of her spine. If you stand behind or in front of the chair, this position is also great for a foot and calf rub as well as a lovely scalp massage and shoulder rub.

3. Technique

Keeping a slow, gentle, rhythmic flow to your movements is key. Make sure your touch is nurturing to both your wife and your unborn baby—this is a time when your loving touch is felt by both of them.

Kneading and squeezing actions on mama’s shoulders are best—don’t put any direct pressure on the muscle, since some points are contraindicated. Use full hand movements beginning at the neck and sweeping down the back along the two sides of the spine—never placing pressure on the spine—all the way down to the sacrum.

You can use smooth, long strokes on her legs, and be sure to spend a lot of time on her feet. The feet go through a lot during pregnancy due to the increased weight mama is carrying.

4. Communication

Communication is important. Your wife needs to ask her midwife or doctor whether an at-home prenatal massage is okay for her. Oftentimes it will be fine in low-risk pregnancies, but there are some situations in which a trained, professional massage therapist is needed or massage is not recommended.

Check in with your wife about the pressure of your touch—too much pressure can be uncomfortable (sometimes we don’t know our own strength!). Be sure to stop the massage at any point if she says she’s feeling dizzy, nauseous or lightheaded. Make sure she knows to let you know how she is feeling throughout the massage and to let you know if anything becomes too much.

5. Safety

Be aware of precautions and warning areas in the body. Steer clear of using aromatherapy essential oils unless you have proper training and knowledge. Know where it is NOT safe to massage—stay clear of any deep work on the legs (blood clots/varicose veins). Keep the pressure light and don’t hold any reflexology points that could stimulate labor.

Let this massage time become a part of your routine throughout your wife’s pregnancy, and not just a one-time deal!


Caitlin McCann is a birth doula and licensed massage therapist who specializes in prenatal massages. Her company, Massage Doula, is based in Bradford, Massachusetts.


Join Motherly

This 'mama' necklace is a bestseller for a powerful reason

There's a lot going on in the world right now, but one thing that's certain? You're still mama.

There's a lot going on in the world right now, but one thing that's certain? You're still mama. No matter what is going on at work, what decision you make about heading back to school, or how you're caring for your family right now, we know you're the best mama for your family.

So in case you need a little reminder of just how incredible you are, we love this sweet necklace from Tiny Tags. And other mamas do, too, because it's been one of our top sellers for weeks.

Whether you're coveting it for yourself or want to gift it to your favorite mama, it's one of those gifts that'll keep on giving years later. It's dainty enough to easily layer with just about anything you have in your jewelry collection, but is just as beautiful as a standalone piece to wear daily. And in these tough seasons, it's honestly a gentle, much-needed reminder that you were made for this. You can do hard things. You are doing the best you can even when it feels like you can't make one more decision.

Tiny Tags script 'mama' necklace

tiny tags mama necklace

The charm is 1/2" long and the chain is 16", falling just above most mama's collarbones. All Tiny Tags personalized jewelry is laser engraved by highly skilled artisans to make the most elegant pieces.

$105

And, don't worry, it's totally low-maintenance. Simply polish with a polishing cloth every now and then for extra shine. Now to decide: gold or silver?

We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.

Shop

14 sweet 'just thinking of you' gifts for every mama

A sweet surprise that tells her you've been thinking of her might be the pick-me-up she needs.

Who says you have to wait for birthdays or holidays to give your bestie a great gift? A sweet surprise that tells her you've been thinking of her might be the pick-me-up she needs in these more-than-trying times. We've rounded up some of our favorite go-to gifts that are certain to be a bright spot in her week. But be warned, you may want to snag a few for yourself. (You deserve it, mama.)

Here are some our favorite "just because" gifts to give our hardworking mama friends.

New Mother face + body care duo

volition face + body care duo

This correcting oil and stretch mark minimizer is perfect for the pregnant mama looking to keep her pregnancy glow. The correcting oil brightens the skin while reducing dark spots, and the stretch mark minimizer works to smooth her ever-growing belly.

$70

Allover roller

esker allover roller

This jade roller goes beyond your typical face roller and can be used anywhere on the body. It works to increase stimulation and reduce puffiness and is perfect for applying any oils to the face or body. Plus, it feels like a mini spa treatment.

$65

Kombucha making kit

farmsteady kombucha making kit

What could be a more perfect gift for the health-obsessed friend? This kombucha making kit comes with everything you need to brew your own homemade green tea kombucha. They'll think this is the tastiest gift ever.

$45

Laetitia lipstick

cupid & psyche laetitia

This red lipstick is perfect for your makeup enthusiast bestie who is looking to spruce up her life in quarantine. Crafted in the United States, these bee and vegan-friendly and cruelty-free lipsticks are created to flatter all complexions. Cupid and Psyche Beauty makes finding the perfect red lip way too easy!

$23

Jigsaw puzzle

inner piecec jigsaw puzzle

Mamas need to destress now more than ever during quarantine. This adorable jigsaw puzzle is perfect for the mama who needs a brain break! The 500-piece puzzle designed by artist Ray Oranges features an abstract gradient design that fits a standard frame when completed. Bonus: It's printed on recycled paper and the company donates $1 from every puzzle sold to youth mindfulness programs.

$30

Matilda's Bloombox

matilda's bloombox

If we have to be stuck inside, we might as well have some gorgeous florals to brighten up the space. Matilda's Bloombox locally sources blooms, delivers them to her door and provides simple tips on how to arrange it into a beautiful bouquet.

$39

'I Am Enough' bracelet

I Am Enough bracelet

Let this dainty bracelet serve as a constant reminder to your bestie that she is enough. She'll wear this on her wrist and read this daily oath to herself, "I Am Enough."

$35

Glow assorted teas

vahdam low assorted teas

This tea gift box set covers the entire spectrum of flavors from sweet to spicy. Individually packaged in beautiful tins, your gal pal will feel like a queen sipping her morning tea. Originally $40, this set is currently on sale for just $24. We'll take two, please.

$24

Find your voice journal

find your voice journal

Journaling is a great way to ease anxiety and will slow your bestie's racing mind before bed. This gift is perfect for first time journalists and includes prompts, daily quotes and coloring pages to help her unlock her potential and find her voice.

$22

Premium frother

shore magic premium frother

This gift is fitting for your latte-sipping bestie who can't go a day without her coffee. All she has to do is add two scoops of collagen to her favorite drink, and she'll have a perfectly foamy drink ready in seconds. Skipping the drive-thru line has never been so easy!

$25

Bath soak infusion kit

maude bath soak infusion kit

Say hello to hydration! She'll be feeling smooth and relaxed as ever after a long bath soaking in these salts. This vegan + cruelty-free set incorporates dead sea salt and dehydrated coconut milk powder for an ultra hydrating experience.

$32

Tiny Tags 'mama' necklace

Tiny Tags 'mama' necklace

It's a hard-earned title she answers to a hundred times per day. Whether she's new to the club or a seasoned professional, this delicate script 'mama' necklace is guaranteed to be a perfect fit.

$105

Superfood honey

Beekeeper's Naturals B.Powered honey

With a lack of sleep and jam-packed days, getting through the afternoon can be a real challenge. Send her a powerful pick-me-up in the form of a therapeutic blend of royal jelly, bee pollen, propolis and raw honey. It makes the ideal companion for tea, smoothies, yogurt or even on its on.

$17

Calming midnight mask with melatonin

Who doesn't deserve a reminder to pamper themself every once in awhile? Even better, this mask does all its work at night while you're sleeping with no extra effort needed. It's an amazing plant-powered antioxidant-packed mask that has melatonin, wild dandelion leaf and hyaluronic acid to rehydrate, repair and reset facial skin. It's so good, you might want to gift it to yourself. We won't tell, mama.

$68

We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.

Shop

Two weeks. I cannot believe that it has been two weeks since my second son was brought into this world. Two weeks since my husband and I welcomed baby Simon, the final piece of our little family.

But, here is the whopper: It has been two weeks since I have been the mom of a toddler and a newborn. I am now responsible for taking care of two tiny humans.

It absolutely blows my mind how much my life has changed in the last two weeks. It's definitely not all rainbows and unicorns around here, but things are going pretty well. This is me being cautiously optimistic.

What I have done is learned a lot about myself, my kids and my new life in the last two weeks.

Keep reading Show less
Life