During a rare, very intense public testimony on Wednesday, Britney Spears shared disturbing details of her 13-year conservatorship under her father, Jamie. While it’s public knowledge that Jamie has control over his daughter’s career and finances, Britney revealed he also has control over her reproductive rights.

In a heartbreaking admission, the star told the judge she has longed for more children but that her father and his team of conservators won’t allow her the option of removing her birth control.

“I was told, right now in the conservatorship, I’m not able to get married or have a baby,” Britney said. “I have an [IUD] inside of myself right now so I don’t get pregnant. I wanted to take the IUD out so I could start trying to have another baby. But this so-called team won’t let me go to the doctor to take it out because they don’t want me to have any more children. So basically, this conservatorship is doing me way more harm than good.”

She’s lived under the court-mandated conservatorship since 2008. In the documentary Framing Britney Spears, which aired earlier this year and put Britney’s life and her dad’s actions on full display, legal experts explained that these types of legal arrangements are typically used in cases of severe disability or dementia.

Britney is a mama to two sons: 15-year-old Sean and 14-year-old Jayden from her marriage to Kevin Federline from 2004-2007. She’s been dating fitness instructor Sam Asghari for the past four years, though she told the judge her conservatorship is so strict, she’s not allowed to ride in the car with him while he drives. She also said she hasn’t been able to even make an appointment with her doctor to remove her IUD.

“I deserve to have a life. I’ve worked my whole life. I deserve to have a two to three-year break and just, you know, do what I want to do,” she told the judge. “I deserve to have the same rights as anybody does, by having a child, a family, any of those things, and more so.”

She describes the past 13 years of her life under her father’s management as “demoralizing” and “embarrassing,” specifically pertaining to people who question her mental capabilities. She asked the judge to end the conservatorship without any further evaluation—she told the court she’s been “evaluated” and “abused” by therapists and other professionals her father has hired without her consent.

“I just want my life back,” the 39-year-old pop star said during a virtual appearance in the Los Angeles County Superior Court.

Fans rallied around the courthouse during the hearing, wearing #FreeBritney shirts and holding signs showing their support to the pop legend.

She added that what she’s been through has been “demoralizing” and “embarrassing,” and that it was offensive for people to question her mental capacity.

“I don’t owe anybody anything,” she said. “This conservatorship is abusive.”