In an excerpt from her upcoming memoir, “Paris: The Memoir,” Paris Hilton is opening up about her decision to get an abortion when she was 22 years old.

She became pregnant right before the premiere of her hit reality show, “The Simple Life” back in 2003. She describes that time in her life as a “wild-child moment” where she was content having fun clubbing most nights, doing red carpet premieres and award shows, and being hounded by paparazzi.

“It all came crashing down when I realized I was pregnant at 22,” she writes in the excerpt, published by TIME magazine. “It was like waking up on the ledge outside a 40th-floor window. I was terrified and heartsick. The hormones sent my ADHD symptoms spiraling. Everything I knew about myself was at war with everything I’d been raised to believe about abortion. No one can ever know how hard it is to face this impossible choice unless she’s faced it herself.”

Related: Chrissy Teigen shares that her miscarriage was actually a life-saving abortion

Hilton was in a long-term relationship with model Jason Shaw at the time, whom she speaks of fondly but makes it clear having a baby at that time would have been disastrous.

“It had nothing to do with him or a baby,” she explained. “I just wasn’t capable of being honest or loyal or whole.” 

She explains that she knew she wasn’t in the right place to make a commitment to motherhood because she hadn’t yet dealt with pent-up and unprocessed trauma.

“Trying to continue that pregnancy with the physical and emotional issues I was dealing with at the time would have been a train wreck for everyone involved,” she wrote, referring to the time she was forced to attend Provo Canyon School, one of the many residential centers that are part of the troubled teen industry.

“At that moment, I was in no way capable of being a mother,” she writes. “Denying that would have jeopardized the forever family I hoped to have in the future, at a time when I was healthy and healed.”

Related: Overturning Roe v. Wade is about so much more than abortion

Hilton says that despite everything, she feels fortunate for the autonomy she had over her own body at the time. Especially now that she herself is a wife and mother to newborn son Phoenix.

Choosing to have an abortion can be an intensely private agony that’s impossible to explain.”

In the wake of the Supreme Court’s decision to strike down Roe v. Wade last summer, it’s more important than ever to hear these personal stories from women.

“I know I wouldn’t have this life if I hadn’t made that difficult choice in my early 20s,” Hilton says. “Women need to control their reproductive destiny. We need to know ourselves, trust ourselves, and know what’s right for us—and when—and stay in the driver’s seat.”