Think your kids say “Mom” a lot? This mom counted every single one—and went viral

If it feels like your name is constantly echoing through your house—you’re not imagining it.

Australian mom Jasmine (@flownoak on TikTok) decided to actually count how many times her kids said “Mum” in a single day. The final number? A jaw-dropping 234 times—and that was just between 7 a.m. and 8 p.m. while home with her two youngest kids.

“It was a way of quantifying and then justifying how the constant interruption was feeling,” Jasmine told TODAY.com. “It was the classic, ‘Dad, where’s Mum? I need her to get my water bottle’ kind of day.” Never mind that her husband was also home and perfectly capable of handing over a water bottle.

She used a handheld clicker counter to keep track and casually told her family she was “counting some stuff.” By 8:50 a.m., she was already at 88. At lunchtime, the number had jumped to 127. By the late afternoon? 181. She shared it all in a now-viral TikTok that’s been viewed over 852,000 times.

“So we wonder why mums are sick of hearing their name—234 times today,” she says in the video, collapsed in bed and still wearing her bathrobe. “Also, just did some quick math: If that’s the daily average number in one year, I’m hearing it 85,410 times. Goodnight.”

@flownoak Ever wonder why Mums are sick of hearing their name? Is this a lot or do you think your kids say it more? #muuuuuuuummmm #mom #mummy #mumma #mum #mum ♬ original sound – Flown Oak

The invisible cost of default parenting

Jasmine’s TikTok turned into a communal sigh of relief for overstimulated moms who, like me, sometimes feel their brain short-circuit after the 87th “MOM!” before 10 a.m.

• “The limit does not exist!” – @breepeaa
  
• “It’s the equivalent of receiving 234 emails that need immediate attention and the majority of those emails result in tantrums. Exhausting!” – @all.things.jen
  
• “On Mother’s Day, I asked only for my name to not be mentioned for a single day. They did it. What a glorious day.” – @appydancer0

But buried in the laughter is something that feels… deeper. As Jasmine explained, her goal was to put numbers to the constant stream of mental interruptions that quietly wear moms down—something many parents feel but rarely quantify. The part of motherhood that doesn’t show up on a to-do list but erodes your patience nonetheless.

“It feels good to have it quantified when we can’t really put a monetary value on the work we do,” she said.

The video hit hard because it surfaced what so many moms quietly carry:

• That being the default parent means being summoned constantly—for snacks, shoes, school forms, you name it.
  
• That the mental load isn’t just the tasks, it’s the interruptions.
  
• That loving your kids doesn’t mean you want to be needed every 3 minutes on a loop.

Related: This mom’s viral TikTok perfectly sums up ‘default parent resentment’—and yes, it’s REAL

Holding gratitude and exhaustion at the same time

Not everyone responded with empathy. Some accused Jasmine of being ungrateful:” it’s hard being in a privileged position. imagine all the women who can’t have kids who never hear that. I wonder how they feel?” wrote @Don’t React, Think!.

But Jasmine’s response was full of grace and truth.

“What these people don’t realize is that I had a baby stillborn when I was 32 weeks pregnant,” she shared. “So I know intimately the pain of never having your child say your name. Two things are allowed to be true at the same time: I can be immensely grateful and sick of the repetition.”

That part. We can hold both. The heartbreak and the overstimulation. The gratitude and the resentment. The deep love and the desperate craving for five uninterrupted minutes to pee alone.

What does it look like to reduce the Mom count’—without shame?

Maternal mental health experts often talk about sensory burnout, a kind of overstimulation that happens when you’re constantly touched, talked to, and needed. Research published in Frontiers in Psychiatry confirms what many moms already feel: chronic interruptions, multitasking, and emotional labor are major contributors to burnout in mothers.

So what can we do?

Jasmine encourages parents to talk to their partners—and teach kids that not every need requires “Mum.”

“Encourage your children to do what you and they are comfortable with for themselves,” she said. “This not only builds confidence in them, but may also reduce … the amount of times you are called.”

Some other ideas for reducing the “Mum tally”:

• Create a “Mom-free” hour where another adult is in charge or the kids know to go to their “second in command.”
  
• Use a “Mom token” system where kids get a set number of “Mum calls” per hour—it makes them pause and think before they shout.
  
• Give kids scripts for what to do when they need help but can figure it out themselves: “If you can reach it, you can try first!”

Related: Moms are the ‘default parent’ because society doesn’t give us any other option

Being needed constantly doesn’t make you a better mom

We’ve been conditioned to think that being constantly needed equals being a good parent. But being constantly interrupted isn’t sustainable. It’s okay to want space. It’s okay to say “not right now.” It’s okay to count to 234—and decide that tomorrow, you’d like to aim lower.

And it doesn’t make you less loving. It makes you human.