I never could have imagined the energy that I felt with you inside me. I anticipated weakness, illness and slower days. Those came but were far and few between. Instead, what was most present during this pregnancy was my creativity.
Like many moms, I had a birth plan, but that plan went flying out the second story hospital window when the maternity unit team informed me that I had an infection commonly contracted by women in labor.
I felt like he took my birth experience and placed it into a tiny box to check. Sitting there, I felt like I had my birth plan taken from me. I was powerless and devastated—for months.
I try carrots; I try broth, chicken; spoonfuls of nut butters; toast; potatoes; beets. It doesn't matter. Every morning, I dry heave or throw up. There is only one cure: the end of this trimester.
I felt like going back to work meant the end of my time being my daughter's mom. In that way, it felt like her grandparents were going to become her new parents and I'd be chopped liver.
