New poll shows kids want more freedom and less screen time

New poll reveals how little freedom kids have today—and why experts say it’s hurting them

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Digital devices are deeply embedded in modern childhood, and the Harris Poll shows just how much they shape kids’ daily lives.

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If you grew up in the 80s or 90s, childhood probably meant riding your bike around the neighborhood, exploring nearby parks, or wandering to the corner store on your own. Today, many kids spend far more time online than outdoors—and even simple, independent activities can feel out of reach.

A new Harris Poll of 522 U.S. children ages 8 to 12, conducted in March 2025, explores how kids use technology, how much independence they actually experience, and how they want to spend their time. The survey reveals that while digital devices dominate childhood, children overwhelmingly want more in-person play and the freedom to explore the world around them.

Experts say this combination of high screen time and limited real-world freedom could affect emotional health, confidence, and problem-solving skills—but small, deliberate steps from parents can make a big difference.

Kids and technology: How screens dominate childhood

Digital devices are deeply embedded in modern childhood, and the Harris Poll shows just how much they shape kids’ daily lives. Among children ages 8 to 12:

69% say they’ve stayed up past their bedtime using a phone, tablet, or video game console.
31% have talked to artificial intelligence chatbots.
27% have posted pictures or videos of themselves online, including 22% of 8-9 year olds.
23% have messaged or chatted with strangers online, and 9% have been contacted in a way that made them feel uncomfortable.

These numbers highlight how much time children spend in digital spaces, often at the expense of independent, real-world exploration. While technology can offer learning and social opportunities, experts warn that heavy screen use can limit the chance for kids to practice problem-solving, take small risks, and interact face-to-face with peers—skills that are essential for building resilience and confidence.

Real-world freedom is increasingly rare

The same poll shows that many children have limited opportunities to experience the world on their own. Among 8- to 12-year-olds:

45% have not walked down a different aisle than their parents in a store.
56% have not talked with a neighbor without an adult present.
61% have not made plans with friends without adult help.
62% have not walked or biked somewhere alone, like a park, store, or school.
63% have not built a structure outside, such as a fort or treehouse.
67% have not done paid work, like mowing lawns, shoveling snow, or babysitting.
71% have not used a sharp knife.

The poll also shows differences depending on where kids live. For example, 56% of urban children haven’t walked down a different aisle alone, compared to 37% in rural areas. Meanwhile, conversations with neighbors without parents were less common in suburban areas (61%) than in urban (51%) or rural areas (56%).

These numbers suggest that, for many children, everyday independence—learning to navigate spaces, make decisions, and explore safely—is increasingly rare.

Kids prefer unstructured, in-person play

While screens dominate much of their day, children are clear about what they really want: more unstructured, in-person time with friends. The poll found that among 8- to 12-year-olds:

72% said they would rather spend most of their time together doing things in-person, without screens.
61% want to play with friends in person without adults.
87% wish they could spend more time with friends outside of school.

When asked how they would choose to spend their free time:

45% prefer unstructured, adult-free activities, like pickup games, exploring, or imaginative play.
30% prefer organized, adult-led activities, like sports or lessons.
25% prefer online activities with friends, such as video games.

These results make it clear: children value real-world experiences and independence, and they are signaling to parents that screen time and structured schedules shouldn’t crowd out opportunities for free play.

Why independence matters for kids’ emotional health

Developmental researchers emphasize that independence plays a crucial role in helping kids build resilience, confidence, and problem-solving skills.

A 2023 study published in the Journal of Pediatrics suggests that the decline in opportunities for children to engage in self-directed activities may be contributing to increased levels of anxiety and depression among young people.

Experts also highlight the role of what’s known as “risky play”—experiences like climbing trees, using tools, or exploring new environments. According to Barry A. Garst, Ph.D., Associate Professor of Youth Development Leadership at Clemson University, risky play helps children “test and affirm their capabilities, as well as experience, cope with, and problem-solve situations involving failure,” he told Scary Mommy.

For teenagers, these experiences offer safe outlets for natural risk-seeking behaviors, reducing the likelihood of dangerous alternatives such as reckless driving or substance use. Small freedoms in childhood lay the foundation for healthier decision-making in adolescence.

In other words, small freedoms in childhood can lay the groundwork for healthier decision-making in adolescence.

Small steps parents can take to build independence

Giving children more freedom doesn’t have to mean letting go all at once. Small, everyday opportunities can help kids gradually develop confidence and self-reliance. Here are a few ways to start:

Let them navigate the grocery store. Ask your child to find the milk while you wait in the produce section. Simple tasks like this teach responsibility in safe, familiar environments.
Encourage conversations. Invite your child to order their own food at a restaurant or say hello to a neighbor. These small social interactions build communication skills and independence.
Teach safe kitchen skills. With supervision, children can learn to handle tools like peelers or small knives, preparing them for bigger responsibilities as they grow.
Make space for unstructured play. Allow time for outdoor games or fort-building with friends, without stepping in to direct every moment.
Expand boundaries gradually. If your child is ready, consider letting them walk to a nearby park, bike around the block, or make simple plans with a friend.

These moments may feel ordinary, but over time, they add up to experiences that nurture resilience, confidence, and problem-solving.

Building resilience for the future

Independence helps prepare children for the challenges they’ll face later in life while maintaining appropriate guidance. Allowing them to try, stumble, and succeed in small ways gives them the tools to grow into capable, confident adults.

The next time your child asks to do something on their own, consider saying yes. That small act of trust supports both their growth today and their ability to thrive in the future.

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