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Do you have those friends who read three books a week, do yoga before work, take long evening walks with their partner, and can't stop talking about how great meditation is for your mental health? Yes, me too...and they don't have children.

As a mother of a 5 year old and a toddler, I have this conversation with most of my friends a lot.

Yes, I should be practicing self-care...but when on earth would I?

We all KNOW as parents how important it is to take care of ourselves. When we can stay connected to our own well-being, it overflows onto our children and we're more patient, loving, joyful parents. However, knowing and doing are completely different things.

Between drop-off, and work, and pick-up, and soccer, and dinner, and bedtime, and sleep (well, we'll call it sleep), when on earth do we find the time or energy to run...or bike...or stretch...or meditate...or really do anything for ourselves? I personally get caught in a constant cycle of I should, I will, and I didn't today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe on Sunday. Maybe next Sunday.

The reality is that the struggle is real. It's hard. But, at the end of the day you are better for it, and your kids will be better for it too.

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To get you started, here are 45 self-care ideas that can help you unwind in under an hour. Some are big, some are small, but all of them are doable.

1. Take time to dream about you.

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Taking time to think about yourself will boost your self-confidence and trust in your own abilities. This is a must when doing the hardest job in the world — being a parent. So, set some time aside and settle into the idea that you are amazing!

2. Get a massage

Who is going to argue with this one? The benefits of massage are overwhelming, and research shows regular massage will reduce stress and anxiety AND help you sleep — umm, sleep? No one should have to tell a tired mom that statistic more than once. If you need more reason that that, check out 9 Healthy Reasons to Make an Appointment Today.

3. Go to yoga

Yes, we love to hang out in our yoga pants whenever we can, but actually DOING yoga is great for you too! Yoga is a wonderful way to get in your "me time" while also reaping benefits for your body and mind. Need some ideas on where to get started? Seek out local Yoga studios, or start at home with a few beneficial poses like these: 5 Great Yoga Poses for New Moms.

4. Meditate

Meditation can have an impact on many areas of your life including helping to decrease stress, better manage your emotions, let go of mental distractions, and be more present and attentive with your kids.The bonus? Teaching your kids a skill like meditation early in their lives will have major benefits for them later in life too. Although finding time for daily practice may see overwhelming, it's so worth the time. Find a meditation practice that fits your schedule and vibe—there are many free online options and apps to help you get started.

5. Declutter something

Clutter can have a psychological impact on parents, which in turn can adversely affect their kids. Who needs more things sucking our brain power and energy, when we already have tiny humans working their hardest to do that? This doesn't mean you have to get rid of everything, but streamlining and getting rid of junk can drastically reduce stress and even take some checkboxes off of your to-do list. Get inspired by reading 'How getting rid of 'stuff' saved my motherhood.'

6. Unplug

Let's face it, we are way too attached to our devices. Don't miss out on life! Find out why it's important to unplug, and the benefits it can have in your life.

7. Take deep breaths at a stop light

This is a way to sneak in meditation with no excuses for lack of time. Don't check Facebook — take a few deep breaths and focus on the present. Check in with yourself in the nooks and crannies of your day, and you will feel better for it!

8. Get a manicure or pedicure

Self-care with instant results! There is no denying that a little pampering will make you feel good.

9. Stretch

Another opportunity to be still, reflect, and take care of your body. Carrying your little one around too much? Stretching loosens your muscles which relieves muscle fatigue and increases blood flow. Need more proof? Here are 7 Incredible Results You Can Get From Stretching Every Day.

10. Choose a healthy snack

Eating healthy has a wealth of benefits, but don't feel bad for that drive-through meal from last night when you were exhausted. Start fresh and reap the benefits today by choosing something with whole grains or healthy fats. Nutritious snacks can help with weight and improve your overall health.

11. Go for a walk or run

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Self-care requires that we take a daily preventative approach to the care of our bodies. What does that more than exercise? Bonus? More time to yourself. Stuck in the house during nap time? Check out this Easy 10 Minute Workout for Busy Moms.

12. Just be still

It only takes a minute. Look around and notice your surroundings. Take a breath — and there you go. Yes, we're sneaking meditation practice into your busy day again...you won't regret it.

13. Find the sun and warm up in it

Not only does this feel amazing, it has benefits such as soaking up essential vitamin D. Scientists at the Norwegian Institute for Air Research have created a calculator to tell you how much time you need to get the right amounts of vitamin D — but feel free to splurge!

14. Laugh

It's TRUE, laughter is the best medicine.

15. Call a friend you haven't talked to in awhile

Self-care is about connection with yourself, but don't forget that connecting with others is good for your soul too!

16. Write in a journal

Writing requires mindfulness. Journaling helps balance emotions, and requires you to set time aside to think and dream. Believe it or not, it has many health benefits, and bonus — you can write down all of those amazing things your little ones say that you never want to forget (and you will.) Grab a journal like this one and get writing.

17. Help someone

Donate to the food bank, help an elderly friend with their groceries, mow your neighbor's lawn. Believe it or not, helping others has been shown to make people happier, and let's be honest—it feels great. Plus, generosity is contagious — so just a little goes a long way!

18. Make a connection with someone you don't know

Connections open up a world of possibilities. What better gift can you give yourself than the opportunity for something great? Maybe it's a career shift, maybe a new mom friend (we know how hard those are to find). So take a leap and put yourself first by stepping outside of your comfort zone and making a new connection.

19. Plan a vacation

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You may not be basking in the sun or getting couples massage yet—but you can think about it, and science says that may give you the boost you need until it's time to hit the beach—or slopes, or mountains. According to an article in the New York Times, a study showed that a large boost in happiness comes from the simple act of planning a vacation.

20. Watch the sunset

Nature is beautiful—soak it in. Take time to think about the passing day, and practice gratitude for what you have encountered in your journey today.

21. Watch the sunrise

Set your intentions for the day. Do you want to be more patient today? Do you want to try something new? Setting intentions requires time for inner reflection, and a chance to start new daily, despite what happened yesterday. Not sure of your intentions today? Here are 30 Intention Setting Prompts to get you started.

22. Read

Whether you want to learn something new, or just be taken away for awhile, reading helps reduce stress and brain fog. So, work that most important muscle in your body! Can't find time? Here are a few ideas to sneak in reading time for busy moms.

23. Cook your favorite meal

Okay, this might just sound like more work, and, maybe it is — but do it for you! Scrap the family orders and make something that you love. Take time to soak in the aromas, enjoy the quiet time chopping and prepping, and reap the benefits of a healthy, delicious meal.

24. Listen to your favorite song (or album)

According to Neuropsychologist Daniel Levitin's research, music can positively alter brain chemistry, and boost chemicals in our brain that support things like immunity. Plus, how do you not get happy when you hear your favorite song?

25. Practice gratitude

The benefits are endless. Research by UC Davis psychologist Robert Emmons shows that simply keeping a gratitude journal can increase well-being and life satisfaction. Really, there is science behind it!

26. Get rid of clothes that are old or don't fit

Believe it or not, your wardrobe could be dragging you down. A study in Fashion Theory Journal found that 85% of women keep things in their closets that don't fit. Take some lessons from the KonMari Decluttering Method, and get rid of old items that you haven't worn in years.

27. Just breathe

Are you catching on to a theme? In case you aren't convinced, here is some scientific information on why your brain needs more downtime.

28. Paint or color

Jump in with your little, or get your own coloring book — coloring is trendy and it's great for you! Plus, it's a great time to bond with your child. Feeling childish? Find out why coloring is so great for your mental health.

29. Drink water

60% to 70% of your total body weight is made up of water, so it's not hard to understand why this is good for your health. Pregnant? Are you breastfeeding? Now your water consumption has an impact on your little one too. Drinking water can also help with your skin, fight fatigue, protect your muscles, help with achy joints, and more!

30. Hire a sitter and do whatever you want

I'm not going to elaborate on this one, you know "me" time is good for you. Schedule time just for you to do whatever you want, and don't get caught running for groceries or catching up on housework. If you're feeling lost, take this time to do a few items on this list!

31. Re-Prioritize

Motherhood mode can take over and make you feel in a constant spin to keep up. Slow down, trust yourself, and take time to align your highest priorities and your to-do list. Take time to consider what must be done, what should be done, and what can wait...and focus on the things that matter most!

32. Ask for help

You've seen it, you may even be one—moms don't ask for help. But asking for help doesn't make you anything less than a superhero. And, the truth is, we generally are least likely to ask for help when we need it the most.

33. Plant flowers

Gardening can reduce stress, clear your mind, and help you sleep better. Add in the benefits of getting extra vitamin D from above, and you have a great cocktail for a happy mommy.

34. Go to bed early

Moms are notorious for not getting enough sleep. This can have an incredibly negative impact on your health and well-being. Can't get to bed on time? Here are a few additional tips on how to combat new mom sleep deprivation.

35. Create a quiet space and go there

In today's constantly connected world, finding time along has become a lost art. But, creating some time for solitude can have major benefits for your health.

36. Take a long shower or bath

More time for yourself is good for all of the reasons above. Put the kids to bed and take a minute (or twenty) to relax, reflect, and rejuvenate for the day ahead. Solitude can change your brain in amazing ways.

37. Shop for yourself (no kid clothes allowed)

When is the last time you actually did this? And no, I don't mean a last minute ad- on to the Amazon Prime diaper order you placed last week. It doesn't have to be big, but it has to be for you.

38. Get a beauty treatment

As moms we take care of everyone else before ourselves. Sometimes that means forgetting to shave, or letting your eyebrows grow uncontrollably across your face. So get a wax treatment (if that's your thing), book a quick facial or get your hair done. Your children think you are beautiful no matter what, but sometimes the littlest things can make us feel beautiful again.

39. Listen to an energizing podcast

Podcasts are a great way to stay connected, learn something new, or just be entertained. Listen during the mundane tasks of your day. Here are a few ideas for parenting podcasts to get you started. Or, want to build on your self-care practice, here are a few podcasts on becoming your best self.

40. Visit your favorite museum

Museums are a great way to learn something new, get inspired, and to share something you love with your children. Stimulate your own mental juices, and be an awesome mom at the same time by hitting a local museum on a rainy afternoon.

41. Take a community education class

Take time to nurture your mind by learning a new skill or taking on a hobby. Often moms feel guilty for taking time out of the day to do something on their own, but stepping out of toddler talk to time with adults can keep us sane. We promise, it's not selfish to take care of yourself!

42. Sing

In the shower, in the car, on a kid-made stage in your living room—singing has a ton of benefits like reducing stress and releasing muscle tension. It's a fun and energizing way to improve your well-being. Add in a little air guitar and your kids will think you are awesome.

43. Have coffee with a good friend

It's easy to feel isolated in this incredible journey of motherhood. Your friendships are so essential to your spirit during this time in life when you will be stretched to your limits. Take time to nurture your friendships by getting together with a good friend sans kids, and focus on your friendships that will get you through this crazy life!

44. Acknowledge and release your stress

Another short meditation practice that you can do anywhere, any time, and even in the heat of the moment. It will help you be a more present person, and a more mindful parent. See crazy coming? Stop, identify, and release! Find more tips on reducing stress in just two minutes a day.

45. Revel in the absolute joy of being a parent

Kiss your babies, smell their heads, dance with them to crazy music Because it's the most amazing, important, impactful thing you will ever do, and you are awesome at it!

My message to you, new parents and pros... make time. You are important. It doesn't have to be all or nothing! Do little things every day that take care of you. Maybe just start by doing one a day, maybe you do as many as you can. It's called practice for a reason and it doesn't have to be perfect. Start today, and make yourself a priority now and every day after.


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Sometimes it can feel like toys are a mama's frenemy. While we love the idea of entertaining our children and want to give them items that make them happy, toys can end up taking the joy out of our own motherhood experience. For every child begging for another plastic figurine, there's a mama who spends her post-bedtime hours digging toys out from under the couch, dining room table and probably her own bed.

Like so many other moms, I've often found myself between this rock and hard place in parenting. I want to encourage toys that help with developmental milestones, but struggle to control the mess. Is there a middle ground between clutter and creative play?

Enter: Lovevery.

lovevery toys

Lovevery Play Kits are like the care packages you wish your child's grandparent would send every month. Expertly curated by child development specialists, each kit is crafted to encourage your child's current developmental milestones with beautiful toys and insightful activity ideas for parents. A flip book of how-tos and recommendations accompanies each box, giving parents not only tips for making the most of each developmental stage, but also explaining how the games and activities benefit those growing brains.

Even better, the toys are legitimately beautiful. Made from eco-friendly, sustainable materials materials and artfully designed, I even find myself less bothered when my toddler leaves hers strewn across the living room floor.

What I really love, though, is that the kits are about so much more than toys. Each box is like a springboard of imaginative, open-ended play that starts with the included playthings and expands into daily activities we can do during breakfast or while driving to and from lessons. For the first time, I feel like a company isn't just trying to sell me more toys―they're providing expert guidance on how to engage in educational play with my child. And with baby kits that range from age 0 to 12 months and toddler kits for ages 13 to 24 months, the kits are there for me during every major step of development I'll encounter as a new mama.

So maybe I'll never love toys―but I will always love spending time with my children. And with Lovevery's unique products, mixing those worlds has become child's play.


This article was sponsored by Lovevery. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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One hour.

That's all this summer goal requires. It requires pretty much no planning or bucket list-making or thought, other than keeping your eyes open for opportunity. This hour will find you.

I figured out the impact of this hour when we spent last weekend at a water park while my son played lacrosse. Going back and forth from game to hotel water park all weekend left us feeling disjointed and exhausted. It was lots of fun, but I was just tired at the end of it. Every bone in my body couldn't wait to get home.

My kids, however, who can run all day and still not be tired, really wanted just one more hour in the water park. This meant I'd have to put on my bathing suit. We had to check out of our room, so if we stayed, we'd have to change in the damp, icky changing area. My hair would be wet. The water park was so loud. Not one thing about the idea of staying sounded appealing to me.

But still, they wanted to stay. They looked at us with hopeful eyes, begging for the fun to continue. Pretty much every other family was headed home. But we made a decision that changed how I am looking at my whole summer – and, really, how I'm looking at how my role as a parent.

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We stayed the extra hour. I am not exaggerating when I say it made all the difference.

I dug deep and decided I was going to be Fun Mom for an hour. I could have been Sit-in-a-chair-and-half-heartedly-watch-their-antics Mom for an hour, but I decided that would be a waste. If I wasn't going home, I was going to really be there for an hour. I was going to get my hair wet and not complain. For one hour, I was basically going to be a kid.

And it was So. Much. Fun.

I realized how important this hour was about 10 minutes in, when I found myself racing up the steps of the kiddie water slide area, chasing after Sam, plotting how I could adjust my way of sliding to finally beat him in our water slide race. I was ALL IN at that moment.

When I said I would slide with him, Sam's eyes lit right up and his little arms shot up in the air with a giant “YES!" He wanted to have fun with me. In that moment, I was not just Fun Mom. I was Fun Amy.

Having fun with your kids allows you to see them in a whole new light. I watched Sam use his God-given giant load of energy to run and run and run and embrace that hour, so much that I think he may be a fun genius.

I watched Kate fearlessly whip down water slides that made me scream like a baby. She held my hand. She was the one who was brave. She had no fear, and her fierce independence and determination made me feel lucky to be her friend for an hour.

I watched Thomas take Sam under his wing when it was his turn for slide races. I watched him teach Sam new water tricks and happily play in the kiddie area with reckless abandon, being kind and awesome to his brother at every turn.

I watched Ellie and Lily with their arms around each other, best friends for this sacred hour. I went down sides with each of them and floated through the lazy river as we all chatted, without a care in the world.

I held Todd's hand and rode down a slide with him in a double tube, just like in our dating days, our kids watching from behind, rolling their eyes with huge grins on their faces, hopefully seeing that marriage is more than making lunches and carting them around – that marriage is having actual fun with each other.

Spend the hour, my friends.

This hour reminded me how awesome it is to be the fun mom, to just be human with your kids. It reminded me how amazing it can be to say yes.

Sure, I could have used that hour to start on the massive pile of laundry we brought home. And full disclosure: We pushed ourselves to the point that there was plenty of super tired whining and complaining when we drove home. That hour could have saved us from having to stop for a little treat on the way home because now dinner was too far away. The house might have been cleaner and my people fed on time and in bed earlier had we not spent the hour.

But the laundry and the whining and the feeding of the people will always be there. That hour of fun was not only priceless. It was fleeting, like a feather in the wind we could catch if we tried. And we did.

Your hour may not be water park fun. This may sound like sheer torture to you. But your hour can be anything. And seriously, it's just an hour. We can do anything for an hour.

Thinking back, I remember my parents taking this same hour with us. My dad raced from roller coaster to roller coaster with my more adventurous siblings. My mom became more fun than any teenage shopping buddy we had. They spent the time. They took the hour. And we have amazing family memories because of it.

Life tries to drum that hour out of us. It tries to make us believe that getting stuff done is the ultimate prize. I am all for folded laundry and an empty sink and kids who are asleep at bedtime. But don't let life keep you from taking an hour here and there.

Find what you love, share it with your kids, say yes even when every bone in your old and weary body says no. Let your kids hear you scream like a kid going down a water slide. Get your hair wet. Eat ice cream for dinner. Play a family game of tag at the park as the sun goes down.

Show your kids you are more than a task master who cares too much about beds being made. Show them that you are not just the adult who wants them to entertain themselves at the water park while you sit in a hot tub (although I did that this weekend, too, and it was amazing).

Show them that family is fun, and that fun can actually come first. Show them the kid in you. It will bond you together in a whole new way.

Make it your goal this summer to take the hour. Those moments will make all the difference. And it's the moments that will change your family forever.

This post was originally published on Hiding in the Closet with Coffee.

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Breastfeeding is not easy. But neither is weaning. That's why this powerful photo from Brazilian mama Maya Vorderstrasse is going viral. Her husband captured the first time she ever breastfed their second daughter and next to it, almost two years later, the last time she fed their daughter from her breast.

And it's not just the photo that is powerful. In her caption Maya shares her emotional struggles with weaning and the tricks they used to make this transition easier for their youngest daughter. The caption reads:

"The first and last time my precious daughter ever nursed.

I didn't know that one person could feel so proud and so broken at the same time, right now I am a hormonal, emotional, and mental mess.

Raising my arm in this picture was very difficult for me as I had to fight through uncontrollable tears: this picture meant that I would never breastfeed my daughter ever again. I have been nursing for so long, that I don't know what it's like to not nurse anymore.



As I looked behind the camera, my husband is crying like I had never seen him cry before, like seriously, a deep gut cry. I was her comfort, her safe place, and I hope she still finds me that way. A month shy of 2 years old, she finally has a bed in a shared bedroom with her sister. We bought her her first bed, used any distraction we could come up with, snacks and new toys to keep her mind off of it.

My husband has taken over bedtime completely, including all nighttime wakings. We are on our third day, and every day gets a little bit easier. The guilt I feel for not putting her to bed is so intense and I can't wait to go back to it once she doesn't ask to nurse anymore. Closing a chapter is painful, but I am hopeful that this new season of our lives will also be special in its own way.

Through this maturation step she will not only grow more independent, but I will get a much needed break. She unlatched for the last time and sobbingly I said to my husband: "I did my best". He hugged me and responded with: "No. You did THE best, because you gave her your all". I love my family and am so thankful for such special and unforgettable moments like these. 💛

*my lazy boob has no clue about what's going on, but thoughts and prayers are accepted for my good one, I really think it might explode🤱🏻

**thank you to my husband, for insisting on filming this, I will treasure this forever.🤳🏼👩"

You've got this mama!

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If you're looking for basics for the kids for summer, you're in luck, mama. Primary clothes don't have logos or sparkles—they're classic prints and colors that can easily transition from one kid to the next. And this week, Primary is celebrating the new season with a major summer sale.

Items, like swimsuits, dresses, polos and more, are over 50% off. Most pieces are under $10 so you can stock up on an entire new wardrobe without breaking the budget.

Here's what we're adding to our carts—shop the entire sale here:

1. Baby rainbow stripe rash guard

With UPF 50, you can rest easy knowing baby has extra protection outdoors.

$14.50

SHOP

2. The track short

The easy pull-on waist will make outfit changes a breeze.

$10.50

SHOP

3. Rainbow stripe one-piece

Cute? Check. Will stay in place? Check. UPF 50? Check.

$18.00

SHOP

4. The short sleeve twirly dress

Made of 100% cotton jersey, this one will be a staple all summer long.

$10.00

SHOP

5. The polo babysuit

Perfect to dress up or down.

$8.00

SHOP

Motherly is your daily #momlife manual; we are here to help you easily find the best, most beautiful products for your life that actually work. We share what we love—and we may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.

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Being an adult is no joke. Beyond dressing ourselves and our kids and, ya know, feeding and bathing the family, there are so many other things that life throws at us. And because we're adults, we have to take care of these myriad to-dos. Welcome to: Adulting!

I'm not just talking about laundry, filling up the gas tank and stocking the fridge with groceries, but those tasks that always get pushed back. Getting life insurance. Refinancing your loan debt. (Students loans? Us, too.) Signing up for marriage counseling.

But guess what? These seemingly heavy-lift tasks are now a whole lot easier and faster to tackle. Here's how to check off your most tedious adulting chores.

The life insurance

When you're single with no descendants, life insurance might not seem like a top priority. But when you suddenly have a kid (or three), setting your family up for financial success is a must. And thanks to Ladder, obtaining a policy isn't the taxing, cringe-inducing process it used to be! It's modern and easy to use—seriously, you can even sign up for a policy from your phone or tablet. Ladder makes it possible to obtain a policy in under five minutes. Yes, really. See? No need to procrastinate!

LEARN MORE

The student loan redux

You have the degree and the career and you also have the debt. And like us, you're likely just paying your monthly minimums without considering refinancing your student loans—because that sounds hard and complicated. Laurel Road simplifies the process. You can check your rates in only a few minutes (and don't worry, doing so won't impact to your credit score!).

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The marriage counselor

Did you know that 66% of couples report a drop in marital satisfaction when baby arrives? It's not surprising that an infant can cause stress for mama, but all that pressure can affect your relationship, too. Taking the time to really invest in marriage counseling often falls to the bottom of the to-do lists because of the many hurdles—finding a therapist, traveling to appointments, the cost of copays or out-of-pocket fees, the stigma around it all. With Lasting, however, you and your partner pair your apps and can begin working on your relationship together on your own timeline.

LEARN MORE

Motherly is your daily #momlife manual. We share what we love—and we may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.

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