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To the woman who doesn't know what #momlife will be like

You didn't know how much the living room clock would be your closest companion, watching it always and praying for it to be the right time: the time when you can finally feed your baby again, because you don't know how else to stop her from crying.

To the woman who doesn't know what #momlife will be like

You knew you wouldn't get enough sleep, that you wouldn't be in public for a while, that you'd be home wearing comfy clothes and nursing bras. You knew you'd be responsible for a new baby while recovering from giving said baby life. You knew things would be different.

But, you didn't know. Because, mama: they love you. They don't want to scare you.

Because, mama: they forget.

Because, mama: they worry it was just them.


You didn't know what it really meant—what it really, truly feels like, to not get enough sleep. To find yourself swaying, even when the baby is no longer in your arms. To dread nighttime.

You didn't know that you could look at your baby and not remember her name, the name you practiced and wrote, and kept secret for so many months. You didn't know what it meant to hold a newly fed baby straight up for 15 minutes after eating, every single time, to minimize spit-up while trying desperately to stay awake—petrified you'd drop her.

You didn't know how isolating your home could be. You didn't know how much you could crave a baby, but realize that everyone in your family and all your friends, are out on a Saturday night, doing Saturday night things, while you're staring at the same walls you've stared at for the past three weeks.

You didn't know how much the living room clock would be your closest companion, watching it always and praying for it to be the right time: the time when you can finally feed your baby again, because you don't know how else to stop her from crying. The time when the baby has eaten long enough that you can breathe a sigh of relief. The time when your family visits. The time when your husband will finally come home from work.

You didn't know how it would feel when you're barely getting by, hoping to make it through the grocery store before the baby completely loses it, while wearing a shirt you didn't even realize she spit up on, and hearing a well-meaning woman tell you how much she misses these days.

You didn't know that you would ever be compelled to yell at a sweet stranger who's smiling and patting your shoulder. You didn't know how guilty you'd feel every time someone tells you to enjoy every minute.

You didn't know when you were reading all those books about nursing, what you were really getting yourself into. You didn't know that your nipples could feel like fire and look even worse, before the baby was even 24 hours old. You didn't know how long it could take for the baby to latch on, only to eat for maybe six minutes or maybe 37.

You didn't really understand the devastation of spit-up—of your baby finally latching on, eating and, then, just as you think, we're doing this, we're going to be okay, you both end up covered in milk. You didn't really know how people would look at you when you pulled out that bottle.

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You don't know that one day, you will go to sleep, and then you'll wake up startled at 5 am, frightened that something terrible has happened, only to peer into your baby's bassinet to see them peacefully sleeping.

You don't know that soon, that teeny baby will seem almost too big for that tiny bassinet next to your bed. You don't know that one day—not so long from now—that baby will sleep by herself in the crib, in her room, and that you will spend your first nights of reclaimed bedroom ownership, watching the monitor, focusing on that little belly rising up and down, wondering how she's suddenly so big that she gets her own room.

You don't know that one day, you will be in the kitchen—cooking away, absentmindedly singing to yourself, with one eye on the bouncy chair beside you and you will suddenly hear a giggle — a real, honest to goodness giggle, that will really be the best noise you'll ever hear.

You don't know that you will sing that song, over and over and over, trying to recreate that little laugh. You don't know that you will have hundreds of videos of the baby doing absolutely nothing on your phone, taken with the hope of catching that moment, and others, again.

You don't know that one day the baby will be hungry, and you'll simply pull down your shirt or pull out the bottle—without thinking twice—without worrying about making it to the 15-minute mark, or watching the lines on the bottle. You don't know that you will find feeding peace, somehow, someday and that it's so much easier to ignore strangers' gazes eight months in.

You don't know that one day, you'll stare at your 1-year-old, who you once thought would never get the hang of nursing, and think, it may be time to stop, but I don't know if I'm ready.

You don't know that one day, even though you were pretty sure you could never put yourself through any of this again, you'll think about it. You'll decide that you're a cozy family of three because you love that little baby so much. Or, you'll decide that you because you love that little baby so much, you need to do it all one or two or three more times.

You don't know that one day, you'll sit in a coffee shop, so relieved to have two quiet hours to yourself to write, but instead, find yourself distracted by the milk drunk 3-month-old baby girl near you, whose dark crazy hair so closely resembles your youngest at that age, it almost makes you cry.

You don't know that you will almost tell her mom that you miss those days, before catching yourself and slipping off your rose-colored glasses.

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    So, what's new this week?

    Tenth & Pine: Gender-neutral and butter-soft basics for littles + bigs

    In 2016, after a stage four endometriosis diagnosis and a 10 year battle with infertility, Tenth & Pine founder Kerynn got her miracle baby, Ezra Jade. As a SAHM with a Masters in Business, she wanted to create a brand that focused on premium quality, function, comfort, and simplicity.

    She sought out premium, all natural fabrics and factories that shared her core values, practicing environmentally friendly manufacturing methods with fair and safe working conditions for employees. As a result, her made in the USA, gender-neutral designs check all the boxes. The sustainable, organic basics are perfect for everyday wear, family photos and any adventure in between.

    Lucy Lue Organics: Sustainably and ethically-produced modern baby clothes

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    Sontakey: Simple bracelets that speak your mind

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    Motherly editors’ 7 favorite hacks for organizing their diaper bags

    Make frantically fishing around for a diaper a thing of the past!

    As any parent knows, the term "diaper bag" only scratches the surface. In reality, this catchall holds so much more: a change of clothes, bottles, snacks, wipes and probably about a dozen more essential items.

    Which makes finding the exact item you need, when you need it (read: A diaper when you're in public with a blowout on your hands) kind of tricky.

    That's why organization is the name of the game when it comes to outings with your littles. We pooled the Motherly team of editors to learn some favorite hacks for organizing diaper bags. Here are our top tips.

    1. Divide and conquer with small bags

    Here's a tip we heard more than a few times: Use smaller storage bags to organize your stuff. Not only is this helpful for keeping related items together, but it can also help keep things from floating around in the expanse of the larger diaper bag. These bags don't have to be anything particularly fancy: an unused toiletry bag, pencil case or even plastic baggies will work.

    2. Have an emergency changing kit

    When you're dealing with a diaper blowout situation, it's not the time to go searching for a pack of wipes. Instead, assemble an emergency changing kit ahead of time by bundling a change of baby clothes, a fresh diaper, plenty of wipes and hand sanitizer in a bag you can quickly grab. We're partial to pop-top wipes that don't dry out or get dirty inside the diaper bag.

    3. Simplify bottle prep

    Organization isn't just being able to find what you need, but also having what you need. For formula-feeding on the go, keep an extra bottle with the formula you need measured out along with water to mix it up. You never know when your outing will take longer than expected—especially with a baby in the mix!

    4. Get resealable snacks

    When getting out with toddlers and older kids, snacks are the key to success. Still, it isn't fun to constantly dig crumbs out of the bottom of your diaper bag. Our editors love pouches with resealable caps and snacks that come in their own sealable containers. Travel-sized snacks like freeze-dried fruit crisps or meal-ready pouches can get an unfair reputation for being more expensive, but that isn't the case with the budget-friendly Comforts line.

    5. Keep a carabiner on your keychain

    You'll think a lot about what your child needs for an outing, but you can't forget this must-have: your keys. Add a carabiner to your keychain so you can hook them onto a loop inside your diaper bag. Trust us when we say it's a much better option than dumping out the bag's contents on your front step to find your house key!

    6. Bundle your essentials

    If your diaper bag doubles as your purse (and we bet it does) you're going to want easy access to your essentials, too. Dedicate a smaller storage bag of your diaper bag to items like your phone, wallet and lip balm. Then, when you're ready to transfer your items to a real purse, you don't have to look for them individually.

    7. Keep wipes in an outer compartment

    Baby wipes aren't just for diaper changes: They're also great for cleaning up messy faces, wiping off smudges, touching up your makeup and more. Since you'll be reaching for them time and time again, keep a container of sensitive baby wipes in an easily accessible outer compartment of your bag.

    Another great tip? Shop the Comforts line on www.comfortsforbaby.com to find premium baby products for a fraction of competitors' prices. Or, follow @comfortsforbaby for more information!

    This article was sponsored by The Kroger Co. Thank you for supporting the brands that supporting Motherly and mamas.

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    Chrissy Teigen/Instagram

    When Chrissy Teigen announced her third pregnancy earlier this year we were so happy for her and now our hearts are with her as she is going through a pain that is unimaginable for many, but one that so many other mothers know.

    Halfway through a high-risk pregnancy complicated by placenta issues, Teigen announced late Wednesday that she has suffered a pregnancy loss.

    Our deepest condolences go out to Chrissy and her husband, John Legend (who has been by her side in the hospital for several days now).

    In a social media post, Teigen explained she named this baby Jack.

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    "We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about, the kind of pain we've never felt before. We were never able to stop the bleeding and give our baby the fluids he needed, despite bags and bags of blood transfusions. It just wasn't enough," she wrote.

    She continued: "We never decide on our babies' names until the last possible moment after they're born, just before we leave the hospital. But we, for some reason, had started to call this little guy in my belly Jack. So he will always be Jack to us. Jack worked so hard to be a part of our little family, and he will be, forever."

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