What do I need for baby #2, dear friends and family? Your help.

Visitors—I need you to bring me coffee and let me shower. ☕?

What do I need for baby #2, dear friends and family? Your help.

As I begin to wrap my mind around the arrival of baby #2, I have been reflecting on what I could have done better the first time around—knowing what I know now. And not in a self-deprecating way, but in the I now know better way. The I-am-an-experienced-mom-now way.

Here’s what I can imagine.

Going from managing one child to two is going to be...well, an adjustment for everyone in my family—me, my husband and my three-year-old son. I know now, because I’ve been through having a child before, that I am going to need help.

What’s different this time? I’m not afraid to ask for that help.

So...I’m calling on my mama tribe! I need you. I appreciate you. Please help me. ?

Visitors—I need you to bring me coffee and let me shower.

Calling all siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, neighbors, great-grandparents! Yes, I would love you to come over and see the baby.

But no, I’m not going to have freshly brewed iced tea ready, or some kind of hummus and dip platter I just happened to whip up. In fact, you will be the ones bringing me something. Anything, really. Lunch, flowers, coffee. And, I want to thank you in advance for letting me run upstairs and take a hot shower while you’re here. Or perhaps a 20 minute power nap? (Because let’s be real, with a newborn around, there is no real sleep. It’s just a perpetual state of napping.)

And, I also need you to let me find my moments of peace.

The way I relax and find peace is through acupuncture. It helps ground me, makes me feel great and takes care of my aches and pains. Plus, I feel like I time travel because I’m so relaxed during the treatment.

Find your peace. For some it’s yoga or going for a run or getting a manicure. Whatever centers you, don’t forget about it—and in fact, make sure you make time for it. Perhaps that’s when you leverage those aforementioned visitors. “Thanks for coming over! Great to see you! Be back in an hour!”

Girlfriends—I need you to remind me that I am not ‘just’ Mom.

Yes, that around-the-clock-text-whenever group of women who lift you up, make you laugh and help you identify that weird rash you’ve never seen before—you know who you are. I need you ladies and I always will!

But maybe now I’ll need you differently—for a coffee break or someone to go for a walk with on a nice day. Or better yet, a night out—with husbands—where we can all relax, have a drink and not talk about the babies we miss so much at home. Now, we just need to find a babysitter!

Grandma and Grandpa—I need you guys to babysit. So I don’t have to feel guilty.

...Enter the babysitters!

If you’re lucky enough to have your parents and in-laws less than 10 miles away like I am, you know the value of this. It really does take a village, and they are a huge and valued part of our village. But this time around, I won’t feel guilty about asking them to come over to watch the kids while I go out with my husband or friends or to get a pedicure.

Because here’s what I’ve learned. While I’m so badly drowning in guilt about a night out—so much so that I can hardly enjoy it—they are actually more than happy to be a part of the “mundane routine”—dinner, snuggles, bath time, books, Twinkle Twinkle and being on monitor-watch.

Maybe it’s nostalgia, maybe they really enjoy helping, or maybe being a grandparent is the coolest job—either which way, embrace it, ask for it and enjoy a guilt-free night out.

My wonderful husband—I need you to continue to be in this with me.

You are amazing. My partner-in-crime.

But, while I’m awake for an all-night binge session at the “24 hour milk café,” I won’t feel guilty about asking you to take our son to Home Depot on a Saturday to go look at leaf blowers and lawn mowers for an hour while I take a snooze with the baby.

I have to remember—especially in those first few weeks—that I am recovering, too. I am still attached to this little human as if I were still pregnant. And that is taxing on a new mama. Especially when there is also an energetic toddler running around who now wants more of your attention than ever.

Becoming a mom of two feels overwhelming in a lot of ways.

But when I stop and remind myself that it’s not all on me and that I have people around me to support me, lift me up and answer my calls for help—I feel calmer.

These people actually want to be there for my family and me, and knowing that makes becoming a mama to two seem a bit lighter and easier—more manageable.

I feel like with this newfound mentality, I can actually enjoy the transition to becoming a family of four and all the beauty that will come with that.

Repeat this with me: Asking for help doesn’t make you weak, it makes you smart.

We're so glad to live in a time when modern baby gear exists. Sure, no one is going to argue that having a baby is easy—but it can be easier with support from some gadgets designed to help your baby and put your mind at ease.

As you build your baby registry, look for products that go the extra mile to make your life a whole lot easier. For example, what's better than a bassinet? A bassinet that can rock by itself. And what's better than a traditional baby monitor? One that allows you to actually take a peek at your baby. Believe us when we say these upgrades can make all the difference.

Here are 10 baby gadgets that will make your life so much easier… relatively speaking, of course!

A bassinet to promote safe + sound sleep

HALO Innovations Bassinest Swivel Sleeper Essenta Series Nautical Net

The safest place for your newborn to sleep is in your room, but not in your bed. Thanks to the swivel function of the Halo Bassinest, you can easily tend to your baby during the night—which means more sleep for you, too. Trust us when we say that is the best gift you can give a new parent.


A smart swing for your baby

4moms mamaRoo 4 Bluetooth Enabled High-Tech Baby Swing - Classic

Believe it or not, many babies are born with strong opinions about how they want to be rocked, swung or shushed to calm down. With the mamaRoo's various motions and reclining positions, you'll be able to find a setting your baby loves when you need to free up your hands for a bit.


A complete travel system for car + sidewalk

Chicco Bravo Travel System - Indigo

No matter where the day takes you—or what mode of transportation you need to get there—getting a complete travel system for your baby will equip you for anything.


A swaddle you don’t have to wrestle

Love To Dream Swaddle UP Original

What do babies and Harry Houdini have in common? A knack for breaking out of tight constraints—which can be a headache when swaddling is the best way to help promote good sleep. Thanks to a breakout-proof swaddle that allows your baby to sleep with their hands up, you don't have to work up a sweat just to get your baby comfortably swaddled.


A nursery wherever you need it

Baby Trend Lil Snooze Deluxe II Nursery Center

During the early days of parenting (when you are feeding and changing your baby around the clock), having convenient access to everything you need with a go-anywhere nursery station can save you serious time and energy.


A little help for stuffy noses

Fridababy NoseFrida Nasal Aspirator

Up until the point years down the road when your child is able to blow their own nose, the sniffles can be a real struggle—but not with a nasal aspirator that makes it easy for you to get that snot out of their nose.


A way to keep an eye on your baby

VTech 5" Digital Video Baby Monitor - VM5251

Trust us when we say you'll sleep better when you know your baby is also sleeping soundly. That's why we're so thankful for modern-day video monitors, which allow you to check in on your sleeping baby without running the risk of waking them up when you sneak in for a peek.


A bassinet for hands-free rocking

Simmons Kids Silent Auto Gliding Elite Bassinet - Odyssey

Babies are soothed by rocking motions. But what does that mean for you if you can't rock them throughout the night? With an auto-gliding bassinet, they can comfortably drift off to sleep... and continue snoozing.


An easy way to contain diaper smells

Diaper Genie Expressions Pail

Sometimes it's the little conveniences that make a big difference in the quality of your day-to-day life. That's why a great diaper pail should not be undervalued: By containing the smell, you will save yourself dozens upon dozens of trips to the garbage can.


A white noise machine that pulls double duty

Hatch Rest Sound Machine, Night Light & Time-to-Rise

A phone-controlled sound machine may be something you never considered until now, but it will be a major lifesaver for years to come, especially as it can also function as a time-to-rise clock that promotes good sleep habits for your child.


And as for securing all these awesome products? Well, a Target baby registry is the way to do it. By creating your baby registry with Target, you will also enjoy their Year of Benefits registry program, which includes perks like a welcome kit with more than $100 in savings and samples, two 15% off coupons to complete your registry, and a full year of returns. The benefits are better than ever right now: Target just launched the Year of Exclusive Deals perk as one of its registry benefits, and this includes a year's worth of discounts on baby essentials (think diapers and formula) and comes complementary when you sign up for Target Circle.

Because while parenting may not be "easy," deciding to register with Target definitely is an easy decision. Start your Target baby registry now and enjoy shopping with a Year of Benefits featuring a Year of Exclusive Deals available via Target Circle, two 15% off coupons, a year of hassle-free returns, a free welcome kit and more!

This article was sponsored by Target. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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Every week, we stock the Motherly Shop with innovative and fresh products from brands we feel good about. We want to be certain you don't miss anything, so to keep you in the loop, we're providing a cheat sheet.

So, what's new this week?

Earth Mama: Effective, natural herbal care for mamas and babies

Founded and grown in her own garage in 2002, Earth Mama started as an operation of one, creating salves, tinctures, teas and soaps with homegrown herbs. With a deep desire to bring the healing powers of nature that have been relied on for thousands of years to as many mamas as possible, Melinda Olson's formulas quickly grew into Earth Mama Organics. Since then, the brand has remained committed to manufacturing clean, safe and effective herbal solutions for the entire journey of motherhood, including pregnancy, breastfeeding and baby care, and even the loss of a baby.

Bravado Designs: Soothing sounds for a good night's sleep

With 28 years of serving pregnant and postpartum mamas under their belt, Bravado Designs is a true authority on the needs of changing bodies. It's true that we have them to thank for rescuing us from the uncomfortable and frumpy designs our own moms had to live with. Launched in Canada by two young mamas, they designed the first prototypes with extra leopard print fabric certain that a better bra was possible. Throughout the years they've maintained their commitment to ethical manufacturing while creating long-lasting products that truly work.

The Sill: Instagram-ready potted plants

We've long admired this female-founded brand and the brilliant mind behind it, Eliza Blank. (She even joined Motherly co-founder Liz Tenety on and episode of The Motherly Podcast!) The mission behind the business was simple: To make the process of bringing plants into your home as easy as possible, and as wonderful as the plant themselves. With their in-house, exclusively designed minimalist planters, the end result makes plant parenthood just a few clicks away.

Not sure where to start? Here's what we're adding to our cart:

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The 6 biggest lies I believed before having kids

Just about all of us had set assumptions about raising kids before we became parents ourselves.

Just about all of us had set assumptions about raising kids before we became parents ourselves. Some of these ideas might have been based on our own ideas of how we would absolutely do things differently than everyone else. Others, we believed what everyone else told us would happen would apply to our littles, too. But, that's not always the case, mama.

Below are six of the biggest lies I believed before having kids—and the reality of what actually happened for me.

1. Put your baby down drowsy, but awake

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