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Why being the parent of a 1-year-old is simply exhausting ?

Who can help me find my phone? We need Daniel Tiger STAT.

Why being the parent of a 1-year-old is simply exhausting ?

You see those commercials—the diaper ones, the cleaning supply ones. Maybe it's the coffee commercials where the person happily yawns and rolls out of bed to that sweet, sweet aroma filling the house. These commercials all have a few things in common.


Their homes are spotless—everything is in its place and organized—it's pretty much sparkling. Their babies are always giggling and smiling. They're never throwing a fit or bucking out of their chairs, or throwing themselves on the floor. I'm sure those babies sleep through the night, too, and their parents wake up every morning feeling refreshed and well rested.

A lot of those babies are around the age of one. Ha! I think I'd like to make my own commercial of what it's really like to be the parent of a one-year-old. Because I'm pretty sure I can paint a more realistic picture than what's out there.

So...what's a typical day like with a true one-year-old? Let's just say, I'm often in 'survival mode.' Here's why...

Is she choking?

Is she pulling out the outlet protectors? Oh wait, one is in her mouth! Pull it out! Pull it OUT!

Is she climbing up on something? Honey? Get down from there!

Is she near the toilet? She's playing IN the toilet? WHAT?

Did she just put that in her mouth? What is that? Honey, open your mouth for Mommy!

Roll down her window. She's going to puke again.

Give Mommy the remote control. No, don't push that you'll delete...too late.

What's wrong, Honey, you want up? Okay, you want back down? No, you want back up again? Then don't buck to get down.

Is she going up the stairs? Who took down the baby gate?

Oh no, Sweetheart...no, don't...Okay, let Mommy get a paper towel.

Did the baby swallow that penny? Oh my gosh, she swallowed it, didn't she?

I need another outfit. She pooped through this one. There's not another in her drawer? Well did you check the dryer?

Where's the skillet? And my mixing bowl? Let me check her play yard. She likes to take them in there.

Don't pull the doggy's tail. And no, no, do NOT ride on her.

Come here, let Mommy wipe your nose. Come on, Baby, just...let...me...wipe.

Don't give the baby that...she doesn't have enough teeth to chew that!

Wait, where is she? Why can't I find her? Where is she?!

Wait, she's putting her finger in the outlet now? Didn't I put the protector back in for the love of God?

Honey, don't bang on the keyboard, please.

I need another outfit—she pulled her bib off and juice is dripping down the front of her.

Don't eat that dirty shoe, Baby. Here, give Mommy the shoe.

Anyone know where all the sippy cups are? I'm going to go check out in the van. I think I saw three or four in there yesterday.

Okay, why can't I find the baby? Check behind the couch!

Is she breathing okay?

Can someone grab Mommy another diaper? The baby had an explosion.

No, no don't...ugh. She did.

Her sock, where's the other sock?

I need to get the syringe...I need to syringe her nose again.

Who left their fruit snack wrapper over here? The baby just ate part of the wrapper.

Who can help me find my phone? For the love of God, we need to play Daniel Tiger immediately.

Sweetie, don't touch that. Okay, listen to Mommy. No, no, no.

Don't eat the dog food! Noooo!

Hot. HOT. No, no. Hot. Mommy said HOT. Do not touch the candle.

Let's get in your high chair. Oh, Honey. Don't buck out of your seat, please. You're a big girl.

I need another outfit she just puked on her shirt. Well did you check the clothes that are being re-fluffed in the dryer? There's got to be one in there.

Where's her sippy cup? Still in the car? Then they all must be in the car!

Where did Mommy put the dustpan? And the broom...the baby, wait..Honey, why are you chewing the dirty broom?

Don't get too close to the edge...Honey, you're going to...the baby fell, someone please get me the ice pack.

The baby lost her shoe again. Why do we even buy her shoes anyways?

What is that? Don't eat that Fruit Loop. We haven't bought Fruit Loops for months. Did she find that under the couch?

What's wrong? Daddy's just hugging me...don't cry. Honey, Daddy can hug Mommy.

Get your mouth off of there, that's dirty. Ugh, germs everywhere. The baby will have a fever by the morning.

Where's the remote? Get the baby the flipping remote. She wants the remote.

Can Mommy have her phone? Give Mommy her phone back. Oh, locked out of it for the next 14 minutes. Fantastic.

Who took the baby gate down? Seriously?

Get down from there. Oh my God, you're going to fall.

The blanket, pull the blanket away from her face.

The binky fell? It's fine. Here just let me lick it... it's completely fine.

The vacuum. I need to grab the vacuum. Which room did I leave it in?

Honey, don't buck on the floor you're going to hurt your head.

Hot. The fan is HOT. Don't touch the fan. Boo boos. HOT.

Don't pull that cord out. No, don't chew on the charger. I swear, oh, I swear.

Okay, who deleted Bubble Guppies...are you kidding me? Dear God, is one coming on soon?

Sit still so mommy can buckle you. Come on, sweetie. Please sit...still.

Don't slam the door. Watch your fingers. Watch your...fingers...

How did you get that? Danger, put that back. Danger, Honey. That's Mommy's cleaning supplies ...how did you? Oh, you broke the baby lock.

Honey get out of the cupboard. Don't throw that. Too late. You already threw it.

Baby, go back to sleep. Do you want to go night night?

Let's go night night. It's sleepy time. Mommy loves you. You need to stay in your crib.

Okay, one more kiss and snuggle. Mommy will see you in the morning. Here's your blankie.

Good night, Honey. Lay down. You're so tired. Just lay your head down.

Here's your binky. Shhh. Let me rub your head. It's late. Shhh. Go night night.

Ok, ok. You win. It's fine. Just come in our bed.

(...as I get kicked, hit, and flailed upon, and get practically no consecutive rest.)

Now, I'd love to see a diaper or coffee commercial that shows some of THIS.


Yes, being the parent of a one-year-old is seriously exhausting. And I'm soon hiring my own camera crew to film the next diaper or coffee commercial. ?

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A very important letter for new mamas

Listen, mom-guilt is a dirty liar. Yes, it's your job to fill your little human's needs, but you matter too. Don't forget to take care of yourself. Hang out with friends, take a drive blaring 90's hip hop or shower without interruptions—trust me, you'll be a better person (and mom) because of it.

Dear new mom,

You will shave again someday. Today is not that day.

Set expectations low, my friend, and set your partner's lower—at least where body hair and overall hygiene are concerned.

That conversation could go something like this: “From now on let's not consider shaving a “standard," but more like a gift that happens on birthdays and the first day of summer."

Voila, you are a gift-giving genius. You know what else is a gift? Shaving the inch and a half of skin that is between your skinny jeans and your boots. You're welcome world.

You will not be perfect at parenting.

Boom.

I have yet to meet a perfect mother, but when I do, she's going to be a tiger who is insanely good at making up songs. (Daniel Tiger's mom, we salute you.)

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14 outdoor toys your kids will want to play with beyond summer

They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

With Labor day weekend in the rearview and back-to-school in full swing, most parents are fresh out of boxes to check on their "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in summer-only toys. So with that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play. Even better, they're Montessori-friendly and largely open-ended so your kids can get a ton of use out of them.

From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

Meadow ring toss game

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Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.

$30

Balance board

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Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!

$75

Detective set

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This set has everything your little detective needs to solve whatever mystery they might encounter: an eye glasses, walkie-talkie, camera, a red lens, a periscope and a bag. Neighborhood watch? Watch out.

$40

Wooden doll stroller

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Take their charges on a stroll around the block with this classic doll stroller. With the same versatility they're used to in their own ride, this heirloom quality carriage allows their doll or stuffy to face them or face the world.

$120

Sand play set

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Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.

$30

Water play set

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Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.

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Mini golf set

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Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.

$40

Vintage scooter balance bike

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Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.

$121

Wooden rocking pegasus

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Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.

$100

Croquet set

Plan Toys croquet set

The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.

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Wooden digital camera

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Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.

$179

Wooden bulldozer toy

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Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.

$100

Pull-along hippo

janod toys pull along hippo toy

There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.

$33

Baby forest fox ride-on

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Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.

$88

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It's science: Why your baby stops crying when you stand up

A fascinating study explains why.

When your baby is crying, it feels nearly instinctual to stand up to rock, sway and soothe them. That's because standing up to calm babies is instinctual—driven by centuries of positive feedback from calmed babies, researchers have found.

"Infants under 6 months of age carried by a walking mother immediately stopped voluntary movement and crying and exhibited a rapid heart rate decrease, compared with holding by a sitting mother," say authors of a 2013 study published in Current Biology.

Even more striking: This coordinated set of actions—the mother standing and the baby calming—is observed in other mammal species, too. Using pharmacologic and genetic interventions with mice, the authors say, "We identified strikingly similar responses in mouse pups as defined by immobility and diminished ultrasonic vocalizations and heart rate."

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