Dear newlyweds—here’s what I wish I knew was ahead in love and parenting

7. There are so many fun adventures ahead of you. ?

Dear newlyweds—here’s what I wish I knew was ahead in love and parenting

Happily ever after doesn’t end with the grand finale of your wedding day.

Sure, you spend months or years planning the big day—it’s a lot of build-up to this romantic, exciting moment. And you should relish it. It’s fun and intense and nerve-wracking and filled with lots of love. It’s an amazing time in your life.

But once the wedding and honeymoon are over, it is only just the beginning for a couple—the beginning of so much more. More love, more growth, more compromise, more commitment, more strength, more dedication.

My husband and I have only been married five years. We, by no means, are professionals at this yet. Maybe we never will be.


But we have learned a thing or two along the way. We have failed, we have succeeded, we have made mistakes and we have grown closer than I ever imagined possible.

And now as our siblings are getting married and starting their families, we feel like experienced love-marriage-parenting gurus (okay, not quite, but we’ll pretend) and it’s nice to reflect on the lessons we’ve learned along this journey of marriage and parenting.

Because there is quite the learning curve when you’re meshing two lives together, but that quickly intensifies when you decide to mesh even more (cute little) lives in with yours.

Here are 8 things I’ve learned along the way:

1. You love each other now. But that love will grow times a million.

It’s pretty crazy to think that—as much as you love your fiancé now—you will truly love them deeper and deeper as time goes on. After supporting each other through real struggles and being there for one another no matter what, it creates a bond unlike any other.

You will grow and mature as a couple, but you’ll also grow and mature as individuals, too. And you’ll be cheering each other on and beaming with pride every step of the way.

Part of the magic in growing older together, I guess. ✨

2. All your other emotions will intensify, too.

That cutie who you will love more and more, will also annoy you more, drive you crazy at times, and will frustrate you like no one else can. It’s all part of the package of living with someone, making decisions together, being around each other a lot and (if you start a family together) learning how to be a parenting team. (They’re lucky they’re cute.)

3. Laughter will solve 98% of your problems.

Okay, this statistic might not be 100% accurate—BUT, most married couples will tell you that it has to be close, right? So, my best piece of marriage advice would be—keep all those inside jokes tucked in a very safe space of your brain and be ready to unleash them during arguments or disagreements. A good, solid joke you two share together will lighten the mood 9 times out of 10. ?

4. Becoming parents together is a beautiful gift.

I can only speak from my experience in saying that deciding to start a family together—because we really wanted to and were called to—has been the most rewarding decision I have ever made in my life. Becoming my husband’s wife was an honor. Becoming my husband’s co-parent has been such a privilege.

Figuring out how to get a baby to sleep together, having him support me as a newly breastfeeding mom, laughing over baby poop getting everywhere—these moments are intense and hilarious and so, so special because they belong to just your little family. It’s amazing.

5. Watching your partner grow into their role as parent is awesome.

I knew my husband would be a great dad. He’s fun and hilarious and extremely kind and generous. He is passionate, intense and very sweet. He has all the qualities a great father needs.

But then actually watching it all happen and unfold over the last four years of being pregnant and having children, has been a joy. I am so insanely proud of the man I get to call my husband and so much of that is because he truly rocks fatherhood. ?

6. You’re going to go through so much together. And you’ll be an amazing team.

Pregnancy. Labor. Birth. Newborn life. Postpartum body insecurities. Extreme exhaustion. Paying bills. Toddler tantrums. Getting on the same page about discipline. Buying a house. Divvying up tasks around the house. Sharing the load of working and parenting and never-ending to-do lists.

There’s a lot of intensity ahead, but you guys will be a great team together. With communication, grace and love—you’ll figure it all out.

7. There are so many fun adventures ahead of you.

Marriage is fun! Parenting together is fun!

It really, really is. My husband has become my best friend, biggest cheerleader and closest confidant. We have fun with each other whether we’re vegging out on the couch or out on a fancy date.

We fight, but we always make up quickly. We hug and kiss and show affection whenever we can. We prioritize our marriage in this wild ride of parenting, and while it’s not always easy—it is always worth it.

8. Choose each other, every day.

Marriage is a choice you make every single day. You can’t be passive about it. Be intentional about choosing to strengthen your relationship each day you wake up with the privilege of getting to love one another.

Newlyweds—it’s all happening. Soak it up. Enjoy every moment.

Your wedding day is just the start of your “happily ever after”—and there’s so much fun to be had from there. You’ve got this. ?

I felt lost as a new mother, but babywearing helped me find myself again

I wish someone had told me before how special wearing your baby can be, even when you have no idea how to do it.

My first baby and I were alone in our Brooklyn apartment during a particularly cold spring with yet another day of no plans. My husband was back at work after a mere three weeks of parental leave (what a joke!) and all my friends were busy with their childless lives—which kept them too busy to stop by or check in (making me, at times, feel jealous).

It was another day in which I would wait for baby to fall asleep for nap number one so I could shower and get ready to attempt to get out of the house together to do something, anything really, so I wouldn't feel the walls of the apartment close in on me by the time the second nap rolled around. I would pack all the diapers and toys and pacifiers and pump and bottles into a ginormous stroller that was already too heavy to push without a baby in it .

Then I would spend so much time figuring out where we could go with said stroller, because I wanted to avoid places with steps or narrow doors (I couldn't lift the stroller by myself and I was too embarrassed to ask strangers for help—also hi, New Yorkers, please help new moms when you see them huffing and puffing up the subway stairs, okay?). Then I would obsess about the weather, was it too cold to bring the baby out? And by the time I thought I had our adventure planned, the baby would wake up, I would still be in my PJs and it was time to pump yet again.

Slowly, but surely, and mostly thanks to sleep deprivation and isolation, I began to detest this whole new mom life. I've always been a social butterfly. I moved to New York because I craved that non-stop energy the city has and in the years before having my baby I amassed new friends I made through my daily adventures. I would never stop. I would walk everywhere just to take in the scenery and was always on the move.

Now I had this ball and chain attached to me, I thought, that didn't even allow me to make it out of the door to walk the dog. This sucks, I would think regularly, followed by maybe I'm not meant to be a mom after all.

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Time-saving formula tips our editors swear by

Less time making bottles, more time snuggling.

As a new parent, it can feel like feeding your baby is a full-time job—with a very demanding nightshift. Add in the additional steps it takes to prepare a bottle of formula and, well… we don't blame you if you're eager to save some time when you can. After all, that means more time for snuggling your baby or practicing your own well-deserved self-care.

Here's the upside: Many, many formula-feeding mamas before you have experienced the same thing, and they've developed some excellent tricks that can help you mix up a bottle in record time. Here are the best time-saving formula tips from editors here at Motherly.

1. Use room temperature water

The top suggestion that came up time and time again was to introduce bottles with room temperature water from the beginning. That way, you can make a bottle whenever you need it without worrying about warming up water—which is a total lifesaver when you have to make a bottle on the go or in the middle of the night.

2. Buy online to save shopping time

You'll need a lot of formula throughout the first year and beyond—so finding a brand like Comforts, which offers high-quality infant formula at lower prices, will help you save a substantial amount of money. Not to mention, you can order online or find the formula on shelves during your standard shopping trip—and that'll save you so much time and effort as well.

3. Pre-measure nighttime bottles

The middle of the night is the last time you'll want to spend precious minutes mixing up a bottle. Instead, our editors suggest measuring out the correct amount of powder formula into a bottle and putting the necessary portion of water on your bedside table. That way, all you have to do is roll over and combine the water and formula in the bottle before feeding your baby. Sounds so much better than hiking all the way to the kitchen and back at 3 am, right?

4. Divide serving sizes for outings

Before leaving the house with your baby, divvy up any portions of formula and water that you may need during your outing. Then, when your baby is hungry, just combine the pre-measured water and powder serving in the bottle. Our editors confirm this is much easier than trying to portion out the right amount of water or formula while riding in the car.

5. Memorize the mental math

Soon enough, you'll be able to prepare a bottle in your sleep. But, especially in the beginning or when increasing your baby's serving, the mental math can take a bit of time. If #mombrain makes it tough to commit the measurements to memory, write up a cheat sheet for yourself or anyone else who will prepare your baby's bottle.

6. Warm up chilled formula with water

If you're the savvy kind of mom who prepares and refrigerates bottles for the day in advance, you'll probably want to bring it up to room temperature before serving. Rather than purchase a bottle warmer, our editors say the old-fashioned method works incredibly well: Just plunge the sealed bottle in a bowl of warm water for a few minutes and—voila!—it's ready to serve.

Another great tip? Shop the Comforts line on to find premium baby products for a fraction of competitors' prices. Or, follow @comfortsforbaby for more information!

This article was sponsored by The Kroger Co. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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Report: President Trump plans to choose Amy Coney Barrett for Supreme Court

What you need to know about this mom of 7.

When Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg died on Friday her spot on the Supreme Court was vacated and on Monday President Trump said he is prepared to make his third U.S. Supreme Court nomination this week. "I will announce it either Friday or Saturday," Trump said on Fox News, adding, "We should wait until the services are over for Justice Ginsburg."

Now, CNN reports President Trump plans to choose Judge Amy Coney Barrett for the Supreme Court Nomination. He is expected to make the announcement on Saturday.

According to CNN, senior Republican sources are "indicating that Barrett is the intended nominee... All sources cautioned that until it is announced by the President, there is always the possibility that Trump makes a last-minute change but the expectation is Barrett is the choice."

President Trump says a vote on this Supreme Court nominee should come before the upcoming presidential election (a move that goes against Ginsberg's last wishes—and the precedent set by the senate in 2016). The President previously said he was looking seriously at five candidates for the spot, but during his Fox News interview on Monday, he only mentioned two: Amy Coney Barrett and Barbara Lagoa.

Here's what you need to know about Amy Coney Barrett

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