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I can’t wait to meet you, baby, but I also want to keep you safe inside

My sweet baby—

Only a few more weeks to go!

As much as I would love to meet you already, I also just want to keep you in there, nice and safe. Because once you make your entry into the world, I know there are things I can’t protect you from.

The world isn't always the beautiful place it was created to be.

There will be days when you'll come across things that require understanding and patience. And I want you to know that just like I found a safe place in your grandma and grandpa, my mother and father, I want you to know that your dad and I will be your safe space—forever and always. We will do everything we can to make sure you know you are loved and cared for.

I pray that you will one day grow up to be a woman who is secure in her identity and doesn't buy into society's definition of beauty.

Now that I've spent some time in this world, I have come to understand—and am slowly learning to believe—that my own beauty does not rely on the pressures of fitting into this world but on the intentions in my heart. I pray that as I learn to believe this, I am also learning how to share it with you.

I pray that when you are young, you won't have to encounter some situations like I did.

My hope is that you grow to be a healthy, strong child. I hope that when you come to an age of awareness, I have prepared you enough to be able to tune out any harmful words mentioned to you. I hope I've prepared you enough so that any harmful words in your path don't have to stay with you forever, like they did for some of us.

I would love to think that I can prepare you enough so that you never have to put yourself or your body through anything just to fit in. I wish I could shelter you from any future pain or heartbreak you may encounter.

I pray that by the time you grow up, the world will have a better understanding of the power of words.

I pray that society will come to its senses about what beauty really means. See, your grandma and grandpa always stood up for me and reassured me that I was okay—that I was beautiful and smart and perfect the way I was. And that even though people called me names and commented on my weight, it's what's deep inside that truly matters.

I hope you will always believe your father and me when we tell you how beautiful you are.

And I pray that one day when you meet the man who will love you forever, you will understand and acknowledge when he says you are the most beautiful woman he has ever seen.

I hope that one day, if you are blessed to grow a tiny human in your womb, that you won't have to ever feel vulnerable from old wounds or worry about the number on the scale, but instead—just focus on how you can keep yourself well and celebrate that you are growing a miracle inside you.

I hope you never have to question anyone who sees your true beauty.

I hope you'll carry yourself everyday with confidence, makeup or no makeup, in gowns made by Auntie Pia or in sweats and sneakers. Because your external appearance shouldn't make a difference on how you feel from the inside, you little beautiful soul.

I love you kid, more that I could tell you know, more than I could tell you ever. And we haven't even met!

Love,

(Can't wait for you to call me this) Mama

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