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To the mamas in the comparison trap: Remember kids get there in their own time

Turn your impulse to “rush it” into an impulse to savor the moment.

To the mamas in the comparison trap: Remember kids get there in their own time

There is a lot of wisdom to be gained in simple moments of conversation with other mothers.


One moment came to me recently when we were staying with some friends during a road trip. My friend and I were watching her daughter as she playfully named the toy animals in her bath. So impressed by my friends little girl I said, “Wow! I don’t think my kid can even do that yet.”

My multitasking friend gently said, “He’ll get there in his own time.” I knew she was right—so why was it so easy for me to forget that and fall back into the trap of comparisons?

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But on that long drive home I was left wondering why we moms feel the need to worry that our kids aren’t hitting every milestone in a perfect timeline. As a young mom in particular, I worry that I’m missing something others may have learned with age. In those moments, I have to remind myself it’s not like you wake up one day and suddenly know everything you need to know.

Mothering comes to us slowly, day by day. On top of that, it changes everyday.

I had no clue how to handle a 5-year-old child’s drama when my newborn baby came home. But I got there, slowly.

Ask me how to handle a jealous 2-year-old and teach a 5-year-old to read three years ago and I would of laughed so hard there would have been literal tears. But, I got there, slowly with bumps on the road.

Maybe it’s because a lot about motherhood comes from the judgment we pass on ourselves only by looking at our kids as they are today—in comparison to others. But it shouldn’t. Because the last thing any mother needs is judgment about something she can’t control.

I couldn’t control the sex of my baby anymore than I can control when potty training will just click. I can’t control when my son will be more interested in farm animals than cars. I can’t control the color of my daughter’s eyes anymore than I can control when she finally gets those training wheels off.

But, the beauty of it is we get to be there for the ride.

We get to guide and help them. We get to be supportive and reap that awesome joy when we watch them finally get something they’ve been working at. We get to teach them. We get to feel each milestone. So why worry about what’s three steps ahead?

I was so happy my friend nudged me with a simple reminder to not rush my little ones; to remember that the biggest and sometimes hardest job about being a mother is being patient. One day you might find yourself worrying about whether your little one is keeping up. In that moment, turn your impulse to rush it into an impulse to savor it.

Because there is one constant truth all mothers can agree with, it is that it goes by way too fast.

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By its very nature, motherhood requires some lifestyle adjustments: Instead of staying up late with friends, you get up early for snuggles with your baby. Instead of spontaneous date nights with your honey, you take afternoon family strolls with your little love. Instead of running out of the house with just your keys and phone, you only leave with a fully loaded diaper bag.

For breastfeeding or pumping mamas, there is an additional layer of consideration around when, how and how much your baby will eat. Thankfully, when it comes to effective solutions for nursing or bottle-feeding your baby, Dr. Brown's puts the considerations of mamas and their babies first with products that help with every step of the process—from comfortably adjusting to nursing your newborn to introducing a bottle to efficiently pumping.

With countless hours spent breastfeeding, pumping and bottle-feeding, the editors at Motherly know the secret to success is having dependable supplies that can help you feed your baby in a way that matches lifestyle.

Here are 9 breastfeeding and pumping products to help you no matter what the day holds.

Customflow™ Double Electric Breast Pump

Dr. Brown's electric pump

For efficient, productive pumping sessions, a double electric breast pump will help you get the job done as quickly as possible. Quiet for nighttime pumping sessions and compact for bringing along to work, this double pump puts you in control with fully adjustable settings.

$159.99

Hands-Free Pumping Bra

Dr. Brown''s hands free pumping bra

Especially in the early days, feeding your baby can feel like a pretty consuming task. A hands-free pumping bra will help you reclaim some of your precious time while pumping—and all mamas will know just how valuable more time can be!

$29.99

Manual Breast Pump with SoftShape™ Silicone Shield

Dr. Brown's manual breast pump

If you live a life that sometimes takes you away from electrical outlets (that's most of us!), then you'll absolutely want a manual breast pump in your arsenal. With two pumping modes to promote efficient milk expression and a comfort-fitted shield, a manual pump is simply the most convenient pump to take along and use. Although it may not get as much glory as an electric pump, we really appreciate how quick and easy this manual pump is to use—and how liberating it is not to stress about finding a power supply.

$29.99

Nipple Shields and Sterilization Case

Dr. Brown's nipple shields

There is a bit of a learning curve to breastfeeding—for both mamas and babies. Thankfully, even if there are some physical challenges (like inverted nipples or a baby's tongue tie) or nursing doesn't click right away, silicone nipple shields can be a huge help. With a convenient carry case that can be sterilized in the microwave, you don't have to worry about germs or bacteria either. 🙌

$9.99

Silicone One-Piece Breast Pump

Dr. Brown's silicone pump

When you are feeding your baby on one breast, the other can still experience milk letdown—which means it's a golden opportunity to save some additional milk. With a silent, hands-free silicone pump, you can easily collect milk while nursing.

$14.99

Breast to Bottle Pump & Store Feeding Set

After a lifetime of nursing from the breast, introducing a bottle can be a bit of a strange experience for babies. Dr. Brown's Options+™ and slow flow bottle nipples were designed with this in mind to make the introduction to bottles smooth and pleasant for parents and babies. As a set that seamlessly works together from pumping to storing milk to bottle feeding, you don't have to stress about having everything you need to keep your baby fed and happy either.

$24.99

Washable Breast Pads

washable breast pads

Mamas' bodies are amazingly made to help breast milk flow when it's in demand—but occasionally also at other times. Especially as your supply is establishing or your breasts are fuller as the length between feeding sessions increase, it's helpful to use washable nursing pads to prevent breast milk from leaking through your bra.

$8.99

Breast Milk Storage Bags

Dr. Brown's milk storage bags

The essential for mamas who do any pumping, breast milk storage bags allow you to easily and safely seal expressed milk in the refrigerator or freezer. Dr. Brown's™ Breast Milk Storage Bags take it even further with extra thick walls that block out scents from other food items and feature an ultra secure lock to prevent leaking.

$7.99


Watch one mama's review of the new Dr. Brown's breastfeeding line here:

This article was sponsored by Dr. Brown's. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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