Kids are naturally funny little creatures. And the humorous things they say, whether they mean to say them or not, never fail to make parents laugh—especially when they’ve mastered their first official kid jokes. Not only is laughter the cure for grumpy mornings (and really any time of day), but it can also be a great way for kids to relieve anxiety. After all, they don’t call it the best medicine for nothing. And when your child has mastered a great kids’ joke, and knows they can get a positive reaction from you, they’ll feel amazing. It’s really a win win all around.

So whether it’s a chicken crossing the road or the way an ocean says hello (it waves), spending time making each other laugh is a great way to be present with your child (and if you’ve heard the same joke over and over again, perhaps introduce them to some of these).

P.S. Moms, if you’re looking for jokes for you, those are here!

Your future comedian is sure to get a few laughs with these silly jokes for kids.


  1. Q: Where do you learn to make banana splits?
    A: At sundae school.
  2. Q: What did the tree say to the wind?
    A: Leaf me alone!
  3. Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
    A: In case he got a hole in one.
  4. Q: What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
    A: A tube-a toothpaste.
  5. Q: Which letter of the alphabet has the most water?
    A: The “C”!
  6. Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7?
    A: Because 7, 8, 9!
  7. Q: Why are fish so smart?
    A: Because they live in schools!
  8. Q: Where do polar bears keep their money?
    A: In a snow bank!
  9. Q: Why did the pony get sent to his room?
    A: Because he kept horsing around!
  10. Q: What do you call a cheese that’s not yours?
    A: Nacho cheese!
  11. Q: Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
    A: Because she’s always running away from the ball!
  12. Q: Where do cows go on Friday nights?
    A: To the moo-vies!
  13. Q: Why do vampires seem sick all the time?
    A: Because they’re always coffin!
  14. Q: How can you make a tissue dance?
    A: Put a little boogie in it!
  15. Q: What animal can you always find at a baseball game?
    A: A bat!
  16. Q: Why did the boy throw a stick of butter out the window?
    A: He wanted to see a butterfly!
  17. Q: Where do pencils come from?
    A: Pennsylvania!
  18. Q: Why did the teddy bear not ask for dessert?
    A: Because he was already stuffed!
  19. Q: How do you get an astronaut’s baby to stop crying?
    A: You rocket!
  20. Q: Why was the math book sad?
    A: Because it had too many problems!
  21. Q: Why did the queen go to the dentist?
    A: To get crowns in her teeth.
  22. Q: How did the lobster get to the ocean?
    A: By shell-i-copter.
  23. Q: When does the road get angry?
    A: When someone crosses it.
  24. Q: Why was the king only a foot tall?
    A: Because he was a ruler.
  25. Q: What did the robber say when he stole from the bookstore?
    A: “I had better book it out of here.”
  26. Q: Why did Sally’s computer keep freezing?
    A: It had a virus.
  27. Q: What would we get if we threw all the books in the ocean?
    A: A title wave!
  28. Q: What do you call a liar on the phone?
    A: A telephony.
  29. Q: What do peanut butter and jelly do around the campfire?
    A: They tell toast stories.
  30. Q: What did the baker say when he found the dough he’d lost?
    A: “That just what I kneaded!”
  31. Q: What is fast, loud and crunchy?
    A: A rocket chip!
  32. Q: What did the left eye say to the right eye?
    A: Between us, something smells!
  33. Q: What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?
    A: A coconut on vacation.
  34. Q: What did the pen say to the pencil?
    A: So, what’s your point!
    For more kids jokes about school click here.

And because you can never have enough ‘knock knock’ jokes in your arsenal, here are a few of my favorites:

Person 1: Knock-knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Justin.

Person 2: Justin who?

Person 1: Justin time for dinner!

Person 1: Knock-knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Lettuce.

Person 2: Lettuce who?

Person 1: Lettuce in, it’s cold out here!

Person 1: Knock-knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Interrupting pirate.

Person 2: Interrup…

Person 1: ARRRRRRR!

Person 1: Knock-knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Cow says.

Person 2: Cow says who?

Person 1: No, silly! A cow says “Mooooo!”

Person 1: Knock-knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Atch.

Person 2: Atch who?

Person 1: Bless you!

Person 1: Knock knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Boo.

Person 2: Boo who?

Person 1: Why are you crying?

Person 1: Knock knock.

Person 2: Who’s there?

Person 1: Broccoli.

Person 2: Broccoli who?

Person 1: Broccoli doesn’t have a last name, silly!

A version of this story was published in April 2021. It has been updated.