I just had my second baby and I miss making mom friends

I know things will go back to normal, eventually, but I feel so cheated out of the postpartum experience I wanted to have.

I just had my second baby and I miss making mom friends

I've always been a social butterfly. Friends throughout my life have joked about how I can make a friend anywhere under any circumstances. I used to have endless plans on the weekends and my agenda was packed for months and months.

Then I had my first baby.

The isolation of new motherhood hit me really hard the first few weeks and after crying every single day to my already exhausted husband when he came back to work about how bored I was with a tiny newborn all day, I made it a point to leave the house every day. I would go out for lunch dates with my baby, stroll around the park, sit on a bench and feed him while I looked at dogs chase a ball at the dog park.

But I was still lonely.

I was missing adult interaction, so I signed up for classes and events to meet new moms that were in the same stage as I was.

We went to breastfeeding classes, both because we had issues figuring it out but also because I got to complain about how hard feeding newborns is with equally exhausted and hormonal people like me. I looked forward to those classes so I could meet up with my new friends, boobs out, and chat about the latest blowout we had to deal with.

Slowly those strangers started becoming friends. We started going to mommy and me classes, or at least made plans and attempted to go since half of the times our babies had different plans for the days. But there were exciting texts and something to look forward to in between diaper changes.

I'm a new mom again, this time during a global pandemic and it's starting to hit me now how much I miss all the things I can't do under the current circumstances.

Yes, I miss my old friends. But I really miss making new ones whom I can commiserate about how hard this is. How especially hard this is because of COVID-19. I need someone (besides my husband) to acknowledge that what we are currently doing seems almost impossible. That every day has blended to the next in a weird and surreal way that goes beyond being a new mom.

I miss being outside with an easy to satisfy tiny baby and also wonder if my new babies will be socially awkward because they haven't been outside the house much and have only seen us for their entire life (I doubt they remember the doctor's face who brought them out into the world, to be honest).

At first, knowing that I couldn't leave the house gave me a sense of relief. I was freshly postpartum after losing a lot of blood and the only thing I wanted to do was sit on the couch and take naps. But as I got better, as the days got warmer, as my babies became more aware of their surroundings I now miss all the things I used to love so much.

I miss dressing the babies in cute outfits. It kind of seems pointless right now. We coordinate clothes for family photos we send to our loved ones via text and then quickly change back to sweatpants and pajamas because its what makes everyone's lives easier (and I really need easy right now).

I miss passing my brand new creation to a friend and seeing their face transform with love and admiration. Right now all the baby passing we do is between my husband and me when one of us is touched out and needs a break.

I miss walking around aimlessly pushing a stroller and getting smiles from strangers who know exactly where I am at, just trying to keep the baby snoozing for a couple of minutes longer. All the walking I do now is from one end of the house to the other, which makes it feel suddenly so so small.

I know things will go back to normal, eventually, but I feel so cheated out of the postpartum experience I wanted to have. I can't help but get angry.

I didn't want this to be this way. It was hard the first time around because I wasn't prepared for the monumental change becoming a mother entails. This time around I was ready, and it was still all taken away from me.

I'm sure when life goes back to what it used to be, I'll look back at this time and miss it for its stillness and simpleness. So I'll try to make the most of it now.

Products that solve your biggest breastfeeding challenges

Including a battle plan for clogged ducts!

When expecting a baby, there is a lot you can test-run in advance: Take that stroller around the block. Go for a spin with the car seat secured in place. Learn how to use the baby carrier with help from a doll. But breastfeeding? It's not exactly possible to practice before baby's arrival.

The absence of a trial makes it all the more important to prepare in other ways for breastfeeding success—and it can be as simple as adding a few of our lactation aiding favorites to your registry.

MilkBliss chocolate chip soft baked lactation cookies

MilkBliss lactation cookies

Studies have shown the top reason women stop breastfeeding within the first year is because they are concerned about their milk supply being enough to nourish baby. Consider MilkBliss Lactation Cookies to be your secret weapon. Not only are they wholesome and delicious, but they were formulated specifically for breastfeeding moms based on the science of galactagogues—also known as milk boosters. They also come in peanut butter and wild blueberry flavors.


Evereden multi-purpose healing balm

Evereden multipurpose healing balm

Also up there on the list of reasons women stop breastfeeding: the toll the early days can take on nipples. Made from just five ingredients, this all natural healing balm is ideal for soothing chafed nipples, making for a much more comfortable experience for mama as her body adjusts to the needs of a breastfeeding baby.


Lansinoh milk storage bags

Lansinoh milk storage bags

For a breastfeeding mama, there are few things more precious and valuable than the milk she worked so hard to pump—and it's the stuff of nightmares to imagine it spilling out in the fridge. With these double-sealed milk storage bags, you can be assured your breastmilk is safe and sound until baby needs it.


Belly Bandit bandita nursing bra

Belly Bandit bandita nursing bra

Nursing a baby is a 24/7 job, which calls for some wardrobe modifications. Because Belly Bandit specializes in making things more comfortable for the postpartum mama, they've truly thought of every detail—from the breathable fabric to the clips that can be easily opened with one hand.


boob-ease soothing therapy pillows

Boob Ease soothing therapy pillows

For nursing moms, duct can quickly become a four-letter word when you suspect it's getting clogged. By keeping these soothing breast pillows in your breastfeeding arsenal, you can immediately go on the defense against plugged milk ducts by heating the pads in the microwave or cooling them in the freezer.


Belly Bandit perfect nursing tee

Belly Bandit perfect nursing tee

A unfortunate reality of nursing is that it can really seem to limit the wardrobe options when you have to think about providing easy, discrete access. But by adding functional basics to your closet, you can feel confident and prepared for breastfeeding on the go.


Bebe au Lait premium cotton nursing cover

Bebe au Lait cotton nursing cover

Nursing in public isn't every mama's cup of tea. But babies can't always wait until you've found a private place to get down to business if that's your preference. That's where a nursing cover comes in handy. This one is made from premium cotton and features a patented neckline that allows for airflow and eye contact even while you're covered.


Lactation Lab basic breastmilk testing kit

Lactation Lab breastmilk testing kit

Curious to learn more about the liquid gold you're making, mama? The testing kit from Lactation Labs analyzes your breast milk for basic nutritional content like calories and protein, as well as vitamins, fatty acids and environmental toxins to help boost your breastfeeding confidence.


We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this


12 outdoor toys your kids will want to play with beyond summer

They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

Without camps and back-to-school plans still TBD, the cries of "I'm bored!" seem to be ringing louder than ever this summer. And if you're anything like me, by August, I'm fresh out of boxes to check on my "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in summer-only toys.

With that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite wooden toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play.

From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

Meadow ring toss game

Plan Toys meadow ring toss game

Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.


Balance board

Plan Toys balance board

Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!


Sand play set

Plan Toys sand set

Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.


Water play set

Plan Toys water play set

Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.


Mini golf set

Plan Toys mini golf set

Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.


Vintage scooter balance bike

Janod retro scooter balance bike

Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.


Wooden rocking pegasus

plan toys wooden rocking pegasus

Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.


Croquet set

Plan Toys croquet set

The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.


Wooden digital camera

fathers factory wooden digital camera

Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.


Wooden bulldozer toy

plan toys wooden bulldozer toy

Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.


Pull-along hippo

janod toys pull along hippo toy

There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.


Baby forest fox ride-on

janod toys baby fox ride on

Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.


We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.


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