Moms, don’t let another Christmas pass without YOU in the photos

This is my favorite time of year. Creating memories and celebrating family traditions at Christmastime will always be one of my favorite things about being a mom—and it never gets old. I have two teenage girls who love the holidays. My oldest is 19 and still makes a bucket list of things she wants to do during the month of December. A lot of what’s included are things we’ve done together as a family for years.

I can remember when she was a baby and looked forward to all of the Christmas magic we’d share one day. The first time she saw the Christmas tree all lit up. Meeting Santa for the first time. Listening to Christmas music. Opening presents. Well, guess what? One day came and went and now she’s all grown up! I blinked and somehow I have one girl in college and another in high school. And I know the time I have with them at home doing all the fun Christmas things won’t last forever.

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But when I look back on all of those memories, there’s always one thing missing—me. I get so mad at myself for not making more of an effort to be in photos.

Why do we as mothers do that to ourselves? We plan, prep and set up these magical moments, yet we’re absent from the photos.

But now that I’ve got a little one again, I’m not making that mistake. I don’t want another holiday season to go by where I’m left wondering why there are no Christmas family photos with me in them.

You probably have loads of family Christmas traditions. Special moments you’ve created over the years that your kids look forward to with awe and excitement.

As moms, we work so hard to create these amazing moments for our children during the holidays, but then we forget about including ourselves. I know what you’re thinking though—you don’t have time or you’re not crazy about the way you look. At least that’s how I feel a lot.

Mamas, it’s time to start being more intentional about showing up in photos with our kids.

I have three kids and it’s overwhelming to think about all the things that need to get done during the holiday season. I want to be present and enjoy each moment, but I also want to freeze time and capture those moments so my kids have something to look back on years from now and remember. I want them to know that I was there with them baking cookies, sipping hot cocoa and putting together an elaborate welcome breakfast for Jingly the Elf. But how the heck am I supposed to do all that?

One thing that helps me is to make a list. I write down all of my favorite things about the holidays. I think about my family’s traditions. I ask my kids what are some of the things they look forward to every year.

From building gingerbread houses, baking cookies, decorating the tree, mailing letters to Santa or reading holiday books. I pick one or two activities and make it a priority to get in a photo during them.

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If you’re anything like me, another reason you’re not in a lot of photos is because you hate the way you look. I always joke that there’s a reason I’m behind the camera for a living. It’s so easy for me to see the beauty in others, but when it comes to looking at photos of myself, I cringe. I’m super critical and tend to pick out all of my flaws.

I can see my teenage daughters doing it now, too, and it makes me sad. I wish I was kinder to myself. Even though I don’t always love the way I look in photos, I’ve learned to be in them anyway. I want my girls to see me when they look back on their childhood memories. I want them to see the times we were all together enjoying each other’s company.

And the good news is you don’t have to be the main focus in the photos. You can let your kids do their thing and include yourself in the background or only include part of your body in the frame. There are so many more ways to be in a picture than just you and your kids smiling.

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If you’re sipping hot cocoa, take a photo of your hands holding the mugs together or of you putting marshmallows into their cups. When it’s time to decorate the tree, take a photo of you and your kids each holding your favorite ornament. When it’s time to write a letter to Santa, take a photo and include your hands holding the paper or helping to hold the pen. Starting to see how easy it can be?

I think another big reason moms avoid photos is because kids can be rowdy. There’s something about a camera that brings out the silly smiles and funny faces. But I’ve got a little secret to tell you: Your kids don’t always need to cooperate for photos. Let them be kids. The goal is to capture moments, not poses.

Get them engaged in an activity, one of their favorite holiday traditions, and then use an app like Lens Buddy where you can take multiple photos without having to go back and forth to press the shutter on your phone. This way, you don’t have to be that mom never in pictures. You can be present and enjoy the moment while you’re taking photos—with you in them.

Sometimes the hardest part is just remembering to do it. But mamas, it’s time to start being more intentional about showing up in photos with our kids. Because what a gift for them to be able to see mom in their memories.