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One day soon, you’ll know exactly what you’re doing, mama

You will become one of those moms who just magically seems to know what everyone needs.

One day soon, you’ll know exactly what you’re doing, mama

People tend to say a lot of unhelpful things when you tell them you're pregnant.


"Say goodbye to your life!"

"You'll never get your body back."

"Things will never be the same again."

In some ways, it's true. Things will never be the SAME. But, honestly, things are never really the SAME. So why call it out?

The first few weeks (okay, okay, months...years?) of your baby's life, it's easy to get caught up in the changes. Nothing, from your free time to your bed to your boobs, is your own anymore.

But, mama? This too will pass.

The day will come when you don't have to plan your life around naptime.

When you don't have to plan your outfit around nursing.

When you don't have to plan your night out around your sitter' schedule.

Right now, you're still learning how to be a mom. You're slowly carving out a new path, and you can probably only see a few feet ahead of you at a time.

But the day is coming when you will get your groove back, mama—sooner than you think.

One day very soon…you will be able to wake up, put on a cute outfit, and do your hair and makeup with minimal stress. Seriously, spit-up on your shirt is only going to be a regular accessory for a few months. And soon, your child really will play nicely with her toys for long enough for you to get ready like a real adult.

One day very soon…you will both operate in a (mostly) consistent schedule that leaves you both feeling confident and refreshed.

The secret? You’ll carve out that path together—you’ll know when he needs to nap, how long you need to leave the house, and just how much you can add to your to-do list without driving yourself bonkers. Before you know it, things will be running—dare I say it?—smoothly.

One day very soon…you will realize you’ve become one of those moms who just magically seems to know what everyone needs. You’ll catch the sippy cup before it hits the ground, almost always remember the spare outfit, and develop that super mom power of having eyes in the back of your head.

I can’t promise you you’ll never make a mistake, but by then, you’ll have realized that everyone does, and it won’t throw you off your game the way it does in the beginning.

One day very soon…you’ll be able to take a few hours (or even days!) to yourself. You’ll feel comfortable hiring a sitter for date night. You’ll schedule a girls’ weekend and leave your husband in charge for a few days. Heck, you’ll post something on Instagram besides your baby. (It won’t get as many likes as the baby posts, but, hey, that’s your own fault for making such a cute baby.) Your world will always revolve around your family, but your time will sometimes, on a regular basis, be your own.

One day very soon…you will feel sexy again. I mean, hopefully you never lost that feeling, but in my experience, it’s hard to feel very attractive when your boobs are leaking, your stomach still feels wobbly, and you can’t honestly remember the last time you shaved your legs.

Slowly, though, I started to let myself appreciate the work my amazing body had done—with or without those perfect abs of my dreams. I realized that my husband looked at me like I was a super model, not just when I found a few seconds to throw on some makeup, but when he caught me in super mom mode, caring for our family and keeping us all together.

Truth is, you never lost your sexy, mama. And soon you will see that too.

You’ll get it all, mama. Because you’ve got this.

A very important letter for new mamas

Listen, mom-guilt is a dirty liar. Yes, it's your job to fill your little human's needs, but you matter too. Don't forget to take care of yourself. Hang out with friends, take a drive blaring 90's hip hop or shower without interruptions—trust me, you'll be a better person (and mom) because of it.

Dear new mom,

You will shave again someday. Today is not that day.

Set expectations low, my friend, and set your partner's lower—at least where body hair and overall hygiene are concerned.

That conversation could go something like this: “From now on let's not consider shaving a “standard," but more like a gift that happens on birthdays and the first day of summer."

Voila, you are a gift-giving genius. You know what else is a gift? Shaving the inch and a half of skin that is between your skinny jeans and your boots. You're welcome world.

You will not be perfect at parenting.

Boom.

I have yet to meet a perfect mother, but when I do, she's going to be a tiger who is insanely good at making up songs. (Daniel Tiger's mom, we salute you.)

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Life

Every week, we stock the Motherly Shop with innovative and fresh products from brands we feel good about. We want to be certain you don't miss anything, so to keep you in the loop, we're providing a cheat sheet.

So, what's new this week?

Earth Mama: Effective, natural herbal care for mamas and babies

Founded and grown in her own garage in 2002, Earth Mama started as an operation of one, creating salves, tinctures, teas and soaps with homegrown herbs. With a deep desire to bring the healing powers of nature that have been relied on for thousands of years to as many mamas as possible, Melinda Olson's formulas quickly grew into Earth Mama Organics. Since then, the brand has remained committed to manufacturing clean, safe and effective herbal solutions for the entire journey of motherhood, including pregnancy, breastfeeding and baby care, and even the loss of a baby.

Bravado Designs: Soothing sounds for a good night's sleep

With 28 years of serving pregnant and postpartum mamas under their belt, Bravado Designs is a true authority on the needs of changing bodies. It's true that we have them to thank for rescuing us from the uncomfortable and frumpy designs our own moms had to live with. Launched in Canada by two young mamas, they designed the first prototypes with extra leopard print fabric certain that a better bra was possible. Throughout the years they've maintained their commitment to ethical manufacturing while creating long-lasting products that truly work.

The Sill: Instagram-ready potted plants

We've long admired this female-founded brand and the brilliant mind behind it, Eliza Blank. (She even joined Motherly co-founder Liz Tenety on and episode of The Motherly Podcast!) The mission behind the business was simple: To make the process of bringing plants into your home as easy as possible, and as wonderful as the plant themselves. With their in-house, exclusively designed minimalist planters, the end result makes plant parenthood just a few clicks away.

Not sure where to start? Here's what we're adding to our cart:

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A few years ago, while my wife's baby bump got bigger and my daddy reading list grew longer, I felt cautiously optimistic that this parenthood thing would, somehow, suddenly click one day. The baby would come, instincts would kick in, and the transition from established couple to a new family would be tiring but not baffling.

Boy was I wrong.

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Life