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You are the best mom for your kids, and I am the best for mine

We should be the moms that we are. We get to define it, it doesn’t define us.

You are the best mom for your kids, and I am the best for mine

What if you are the best mom there is for your kids, what if I’m the best for mine?


What if we really believed that?

I remember when our first son was just a baby, I was talking to a seasoned mom of three. I was strung out on new mom anxiety and was stressing about everything from nursing schedules to mysterious skin rashes.

She looked at me kindly, “Ya know, it seems like you’re really worried about doing things the ‘right way’, but parenting isn’t that complicated. You don’t need to read every book there is, trust your gut, love them, you aren’t going to mess this up.”

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I remember nodding at her politely and thinking, ARE YOU INSANE??? I AM NOT TO BE TRUSTED!! I CANNOT EVEN KEEP MY CLOSET CLEAN OR REMEMBER TO SHAVE MY ARMPITS!

I was already a perfectionist, but I’ve never wanted to be perfect more than when my baby boy was first placed in my arms. I like to imagine that if I were still single I’d be a saint. I’d be so calm and patient and kind.

Instead, I’m the frazzled mom who just yelled obscenities at the kiddie park when she got nailed in the ankle by her son’s skateboard.

That is who I am now.

Of course, I wouldn’t change a thing, not ever, but nothing has ever made me more painfully aware of my flaws than being a mother.

I am often fixated on what I am not. I am not organized. I am not good at playing make-believe. I’m a lot more impatient than I’d like to be. I am not good at brushing my girls’ hair every day (hence the rat’s nest that will now need a pickaxe to come untangled).

But the thing is: no one is good at everything.

I am good at having deep conversations with them. I am good at getting them outside to hike and play. I’m good at saying sorry. I’m good at going after my dreams (and hopefully inspiring them to do the same).

What if instead of being hard on ourselves for what we are not, we focused on developing the best of the things we already are?

Whether you’re a working mom, stay-at-home-mom, homeschooling mom, kombucha making, wine drinking, running, yoga-ing, pizza eating, emotional, not-very-emotional, free-spirit, by-the-book…whatever it is you are…WHAT IF that’s exactly what they need?

I love personality tests. It fascinates me how different we all are from each other. Why is it that when it comes to motherhood we’re all supposed to fit in a cookie cutter shape?

It isn’t possible.

We should be the moms that WE are. We get to define it, it doesn’t define us.

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t keep learning and growing and asking for advice, but I am saying WE’VE GOT THIS. We are strong enough, we are wise enough, we are enough. Enough.

I think I’m starting to understand what my friend was talking about: the strengths we bring to the table are exactly what is needed for our kids to become the adults they’re meant to be.

So let’s love them and trust our guts…

We’ve got this.

Originally posted on Wonderoak.

In This Article

    14 toys that will keep your kids entertained inside *and* outside

    They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

    With fall in full swing, most parents are fresh out of boxes to check on their "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in outside-only toys. So with that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play. Even better, they're Montessori-friendly and largely open-ended so your kids can get a ton of use out of them.

    From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

    Wooden doll stroller

    Janod wooden doll stroller

    Take their charges on a stroll around the block with this classic doll stroller. With the same versatility they're used to in their own ride, this heirloom quality carriage allows their doll or stuffy to face them or face the world.

    $120

    Detective set

    Plan Toys detective set

    This set has everything your little detective needs to solve whatever mystery they might encounter: an eye glasses, walkie-talkie, camera, a red lens, a periscope and a bag. Neighborhood watch? Watch out.

    $40

    Sand play set

    Plan Toys sand set

    Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.

    $30

    Water play set

    Plan Toys water play set

    Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.

    $100

    Mini golf set

    Plan Toys mini golf set

    Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.

    $40

    Vintage scooter balance bike

    Janod retro scooter balance bike

    Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.

    $121

    Wooden rocking pegasus

    plan toys wooden rocking pegasus

    Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.

    $100

    Croquet set

    Plan Toys croquet set

    The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.

    $45

    Wooden digital camera

    fathers factory wooden digital camera

    Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.

    $179

    Wooden bulldozer toy

    plan toys wooden bulldozer toy

    Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.

    $100

    Pull-along hippo

    janod toys pull along hippo toy

    There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.

    $33

    Baby forest fox ride-on

    janod toys baby fox ride on

    Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.

    $88

    Balance board

    Plan Toys balance board

    Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!

    $75

    Meadow ring toss game

    Plan Toys meadow ring toss game

    Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.

    $30

    We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.

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    Since 1973, Micuna has been perfecting the art of sustainably handcrafted baby furniture. Made from wood sourced from the north of Spain and Germany and manufactured in sustainable certified sawmill companies only, their modern and minimalist high chairs are perfect for families who don't want to sacrifice their aesthetic for function. What's more, they hold themselves to the strictest of European and American safety standards, resulting in only the best for parents and their littles.

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