When our little ones experience big emotions, knowing the best way to react can be tough. One mom explains how she responded to her daughter during one of these moments in a viral post—and by doing so, shares her wisdom with the rest of us.
Dr. Chawanna B. Chambers, an award-winning educator, and entrepreneur shared a series of tweets earlier this year that centered on an experience she had with her 6-year-old daughter being, as Chambers described, “rude/curt.”
The tweets also went viral on Facebook, and it’s easy to see why—we can all relate to kids who aren’t being the best versions of themselves, and we all want to be the best parents we can be.
Chambers says she assured her daughter she wasn’t in trouble, she just wanted to know how she could help her and empathize with her.
“She said, ‘My brain tells me to be rude,'” Chambers writes. “I told her that’s sort of how it happens for lots of people. When our emotions aren’t happy, sometimes we take it out on others even when they don’t deserve it.”
Her daughter seemed relieved that her mother understood this exact feeling. Chambers taught her daughter to say “I’m not feeling my best self, I need a minute” any time she feels like snapping at or around someone who doesn’t have anything to do with the feeling.
Mom and daughter practiced saying it over and over until all was well, but Chambers writes that the experience made her think.
“I think about all the ways I could’ve responded,” she writes. “Particularly a power trip because ‘I’m the adult,’ but she needed to process something not even about me.”
In her tweets, Chambers says being slower to anger helps her teach her kids about emotional maturity. “Even at 6, she can learn to challenge her own thoughts,” she concludes. “She can learn how her brain works and the best ways to engage with others.”
Emotional maturity is not something any of us is born with—it takes time and experience to develop the coping skills necessary to respond to tough situations and big emotions without losing our cool.
This is a brilliant reminder that teaching our little ones to manage their emotions begins with us.
And although we can’t control what happens to us, we can control how we respond. By believing in ourselves—and helping our kids do the same—we’re sharing more peaceful energy with the world.