Motherly's 2019 State of Motherhood survey results

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At Motherly, we believe that motherhood matters. As the voice of today's modern mother, with a 20M+ monthly unique audience, we set out in our second annual State of Motherhood Survey to better understand the experience of motherhood as it stands right now—and to help the world discover and understand that story.

What we found is that Millennial mothers feel even more defined by motherhood than they did last year, but in 2019 they are also more likely to feel unsupported by society. A full 85% of moms don't think society understands or supports the women who are supporting the next generation, that's up more than 10% over last year.

The second annual State of Motherhood survey results have been reported by Forbes, Huffington Post, USA TODAY, Real Simple and other outlets, and continue to attract media attention.

Our internal team continues to unpack the survey data to create thought-leading content for our audience.

The survey, conducted online March 28 – April 11, 2019, was answered by 6,457 respondents and offers compelling insights into the attitudes, behaviors, identities and lifestyle of Millennial mothers—the most highly educated, first digitally-native generation of women to become mothers.

Data was run on April 16th by Edge Research to weight all data to align with US Census demographic data ensuring results are a statistically accurate representation of today's Millennial mother.

Read the full survey results here.

Among the key findings:

1. Motherhood and me

This year finds an even larger proportion of Millennial moms saying that since becoming a parent, they are "most strongly defined by their motherhood at 67% up from 59% in the 2018 survey. Continuing with the trend from last year, this is most true for younger moms (76% of moms under 30), those with more than one child (77%) and those who are not in the workforce (82%).

While 76% of moms under 30 feel most defined by motherhood, only 62% of moms over 35 say the same, suggesting that as moms mature, they retain or re-connect with other aspects of their identity. Importantly, one-third of Millennial moms say they are "most strong defined by other non-motherhood aspects of their life and self."

Data reference Q16: Select which best describes how you view your identity.

2. Impact to relationship + sex life

Most moms in the sample are married (91%) or living with a partner (6%). Similar to the 2018 findings, majorities report that having children has brought them closer together with their partners (74%), while one-fifth (21%) admit that parenthood has pulled them apart.

Spending time together with their partners (33%) and sex life (26%) top the list of parent-related relationship tension. This year, moms report that sex is a pressure point in even greater numbers than last year (up from 16% in 2018). Money worries rounds out the top three relationship tensions at 19% while parenting differences remains lowest on the list at 9%.

Interestingly, pressure points of time spent together and sex cut across all relationships in equal measure regardless of number of children and working outside the home:

Data reference Q07: Which best describes the impact on your relationship since becoming a parent; and Q08: What is your greatest parent-related relationship tension? (NOTE: 2018 wording "Which of the below best aligns your primary concern when reflecting on your relationship and parenthood?" could account for difference in responses).

This year Motherly dove a little deeper into the impact of becoming a parent on moms' sex lives. While most moms (53%) report becoming interested in sex again by 6 weeks after giving birth (11% before 6 weeks), fully 38% report it took 6-12 months before they were really interested in sexual intimacy again. Age seems to play a role with 67% of younger moms under 30 reporting being ready for sex by 6 weeks post-partum, compared to 54% of moms aged 30 to 34 and 44% of moms 35 and older. Perhaps more importantly, nearly a third of Millennial moms (31%) report having sex with their partner before they felt ready to do so.

Data reference Q09: At what point did you feel interested/ready to re-engage in sexual intimacy after becoming a mother? Q10. Did you have sex before you felt ready to do so?

3. Work + the millennial mom

Nearly identical to the 2018 survey, 53% of Millennial moms in the sample are working full-time, 15% part-time and 28% are not in the workforce currently. The majority of Millennial moms surveyed (54%) had a mom who worked outside the house on a regular basis. Among those working and in relationships, 39% report contributing half or more of the household income; while 43% contribute between a quarter and one-half and 16% contribute less than a quarter.

Financial need is down a bit from last year, though remains the top reason for Millennials moms to work (75% in 2019 compared to 83% in 2018). However, as we saw last year, the desire to work is evident as well. Both full-time (49%) and part-time working moms (53%) point to a "desire to participate in work outside the household." And more than a third (36%) of working moms are motivated by a commitment to their career. Similar to 2018, desire to participate in the workforce is evident among non- working moms as well with 63% saying they intend to return to the workforce in the future.

Data reference Q22: Are you employed? Q24: If "Yes", which best matches your reason for working? Select all that apply. Q34: How much of your family's annual household income do you contribute? Q40: If you don't currently work, are you planning to re-enter the paid workforce (part time or full time) at some point in the future?

4. Impact of parenting on work

Motherly dove deep into how moms are making work and motherhood work for them – or not.

Overall half (50%) of Millennial women surveyed report making a change to their work status since becoming a mother. Nine-in-ten (90%) part-time working moms say they changed their work status since becoming a parent, as did a quarter (24%) of full-time working moms. Among moms not currently employed, 73% report changing their work status, mostly to becoming stay-at-home moms. Most obviously for part-time working moms is changing to working fewer hours, i.e., moving to part-time from full-time (55%); followed by working from home (11%) or getting a more flexible role (7%). For moms who have continued full-time work, the most common changes are getting a more flexible role (10%), working fewer hours (6%), and working from home (4%) are the main ways they are adapting work to motherhood.

Examining the reasons behind why moms have adjusted their approach to work a mixed bag. For some (22%) it is about adjusting to new responsibilities. For others (20%) work became less important. A small but significant number (10%) also point to employer conditions not being conducive to working and parenting for a variety of reasons including the cost of childcare, inability to strike a work-life balance or the work culture not being supportive.

Data reference Q25: Have you changed your work status (i.e., full time to part time, etc.) in some way since becoming a parent? Q26: If "Yes", please describe how your job situation has changed since becoming a parent; Q27: If "Yes Adjusted Work Status, which best describes the reason for adjusting your approach to work?

5. Attitudes toward work + parenting

While the 2018 survey found most Millennial moms (78%) had mixed feelings about combining a career and motherhood, saying while "it's possible to have both, there are real trade-offs." This year, Motherly asked the question a bit differently, but again we see some mixed emotions. Just about half (51%) say, "I feel discouraged: it's extremely challenging managing trade-offs," while a third (33%) say, "I feel optimistic, I believe it's possible to combine them creatively." Perhaps of greater concern is that so few Millennial moms feel empowered by working. Fewer than 1-in-10 (9%) feel that becoming a mother has helped them in their career and the majority of those (59%) say they have felt that way since their child was a baby, indicating that this empowering is coming from within, rather than the workplace recognizing and validating the contributions of working moms.

Yet, when asked how work impacts their parenting skills, more than half of working moms (55%) say that working has empowered or inspired them to be a better mother. This holds true for working moms of all backgrounds and both full and part-time. Even more positively, 90% say their work choice has helped them set a positive example for their children – again equally true for full-time and part-time working moms.

Data reference: Q29: Which best describes your mentality around combining a career and motherhood? Q30: If you answered empowered, when did that feeling take hold? (If you did not, please select "not applicable."); Q38: If you are employed, does your work empower or inspire you to be a better mother? Q39: Do you believe that your work choice helps you to set a positive example for your children?

6. Support at work

Topping the list of the ways in which employers could better support mothers is longer, paid maternity leave (24%), followed by on-site childcare or childcare subsidies (21%), so in total 45% would like more support from employers in the transition to motherhood and ongoing support of child-rearing . Combined, flexible schedules (12%) and remote work opportunities (15%) make up the second big request from working moms – helping them better fit the need to work into the necessities of being a parent.

Encouragingly most working moms feel their place of employment is supportive of breastfeeding. Among those for whom it applies, 69% reported their employer provides adequate breastfeeding support in the form of time, privacy, etc. But there is still some work to be done in this regard: Just over 1-in-10 (12%) say their employer does not provide adequate support and another 15% say that even though their employer provides the space and breastfeeding is looked down upon in the culture of their workplace. These moms feel judged by both managers and co-workers.

Data reference: Q35: If you are employed, how could your employer best support you as a mother? Q36: If you are employed, does your employer provide adequate breastfeeding support? (i.e. time, privacy); Q37: If yes, but culturally you feel it is looked down upon, at what level do you feel like it is not accepted?

7. Support at home

Most of the moms in the sample are with a partner and majority of those partners (98%) are working as well. As we saw last year, the majority (59%) say their partner's career has not changed, while a significant minority (31%) say their partner has scaled up his or her career. Partner scale-up is most common among couples who have two or more children (38% for two or more children compared to 26% for one child) or where mom is not working (45%, compared to 35% when mom is working part-time or 22% when full-time). So, there is evidence that partners see the need to step up their economic contribution to the household after becoming a parent; but it is important to recognize that the age of respondents (in their 30s) means that their career trajectory would typically pick up at this point.

When asked directly about how supported they feel at home, working moms say partners have some room to improve with 68% saying they feel supported by their partners, but 28% saying "only sometimes." This "sometimes" qualifier manifests itself in the results of other lines of questioning about how much moms are doing for the household.

When asked where they need the most support since becoming a mom, survey respondents most frequently point to their physical and mental health (33%), followed by home (25%) and with their spouse (24%). These numbers come to life when you consider:

  • 4-in-10 (43%) report not going out with friends in the past month (non-working moms are even more likely to say this (52% compared to 40% among working moms)
  • Nearly 5-in-10 (47%) have not gone out on a date with their partner (also more likely to be true of non-working moms at 54% compared to 44%
  • 6-in-10 (61%) report handling most of the household chores and responsibilities themselves, with 32% saying they are shared equally and 5% who say their partner does the household lift
  • 6-in-10 (62%) also say that in the last day, they had less than one hour to themselves without work or family obligations.

Moms report spending the most time caring for children with 91% of full-time working moms, 97% of part-time working moms and 99% of non-working moms who report spending three or more hours a day actively caring for children. When it comes to the amount of time spent cooking and cleaning,

All moms are more likely to spend more time on chores than they are on themselves; and non-working moms are spending the most time. In fact, it

seems that as moms leave or draw down on work, household work takes up more time. How are they dealing? In the survey Millennial moms shared some of their go-to "life hacks." Some tactics cut across all moms, working and non-working like online shopping (66% working, 63% non-working), calendars and to-do lists (59% for both) and waking up earlier and going to bed later than everyone else in the household (44% working, 42% non-working). Other tactics are more likely to be used by working moms, most obviously child care assistance (29% working moms, 8% non-working) and pre-prepped meals (23% working, 16% non-working).

Data Reference: Q31: Is your partner employed? Q32: Has your partner opted to scale back or scale up their work since becoming a parent? Q23: If you are employed, do you feel supported by your spouse/partner? Q45: Where do you feel you need the most support in your life since becoming a mom? Q47: In the last month, how many times did you go out with friends? Q48: In the last month, how many times did you go on a date with your partner? Q52: Yesterday, how much time did you get to yourself without work or family obligations? Q53: In the last 24 hours, how much time did you spend on household chores? (i.e. laundry, cleaning); Q54: In the last 24 hours, how much time did you spend cooking? Q55: In the last 24 hours, how much time did you spend caring for children? Q49: What are your go-to 'life hacks'? Select all that apply.

8. Raising the next generation

Once again Motherly asked about parenting style and the qualities Millennial moms are trying to instill in the next generation. As we found last year, "kindness" is the single character trait the most moms want to cultivate in their children, holding steady as the top choice by 46%.

Notably, a number of other qualities all lost a little bit of traction with the addition of "resilience" to the list.

When it comes to the character of their children, we once again see some of the biggest differences in Millennial moms by race and ethnicity. White Millennial moms continues to place the most emphasis on kindness (51%) while their non-white counter parts value kindness to a lesser degree (27% among African-Americans, 41% among Hispanics).

Moms of color are more likely to place weight on respect and resilience:

When it comes to parenting style, Millennial moms surveyed say they are "Collaborative." "I am collaborative, I try to solve problems with my child" is the number one style across the board at 57% (down from 62% in 2018) and the top choice for every group. It is followed by "Hands On," with nearly a quarter (28%, up 5 points from 2018) describing their parenting style as "I'm very involved in directing my child." There are far fewer who say they are Disciplinarians, "I want my child to follow and obey family rules above all else" (4%) or Free Range, "I want my child to make their own decisions with limited parental interference" (5%).

When it comes to discipline, Millennials moms self-report that their approach is in keeping with their Collaborative parenting style. The survey asked moms what approach they used the last time they needed to discipline their child. The plurality (43%) report calmly redirecting and guiding their child. The next most likely approach was emotional reasoning at 18%.

Once again, moms with more than one child either have a different style of discipline or are simply more honest. They are much more likely to report using disciplinary tactics such as time out (17% compared to 5% of moms with one child); consequences (16% compared to 5% of moms with one child), or just plain yelling (12% compared to 4% of moms with one child).

Data reference: Q17: What is the most important quality you aim to cultivate in your child(ren)? Q19: Overall, what best describes your parenting style: [CHOICES GIVEN]; Q20: The last time you had to discipline your child, what action did you take?

9. Looking for guidance

When it comes to being inspired as parents, Millennial moms continue to follow the Three F's – Family, Fellow Moms and Faith. This year, family lost a little bit of traction, down to 36% from 45% in 2018; while fellow moms shows an uptick to 26% from 19% last year. Faith held fairly steady at 18% this year compared to 20% in 2018. As we saw last year, family is even more important to Latina moms at 41% than it is to white moms (34%); while African-American moms draw more on faith (25%) than other moms do.

When it comes to seeking guidance for a parenting challenge, sources are consistent with 2018. The survey asked, "the last time you faced a parenting challenge, who or what did you first turn to?" and family is on the spot. Just over a third (38%) of Millennial moms in the survey say the go-to source for their latest parenting challenge was family, peaking among Latina moms at 42%. As a source of parenting advice, Google at 16% slightly edges out friends at 14%.

Data reference: Q18: What is your most important source of inspiration as a parent? Q21: The last time you faced a parenting challenge, who or what did you first turn to?

10. Finances + family

By far, housing is the greatest expense for Millennial parents – the single largest expense for 69%. In a distant second, 10% say their biggest monthly expense is childcare at 10%, which climbs to 17% among working moms. The majority (59%) report that less than 10% of their monthly incomes goes to childcare – still 30% say it is between 11-25% and another 11% say childcare accounts for 26% or more of their monthly expenses. Not surprisingly, this expense is most acute among working moms where 45% report childcare accounting for 11-25% of their monthly spend.

Date Reference: Q43: Which monthly bill is most expensive? Q44: What percentage of your monthly household income goes to childcare?

Closing

This year, Millennial moms said even more strongly that (85%, compared to 74% in 2018) that society does not a good job of understanding and supporting mothers. This view is held across groups regardless of race, ethnicity, age, number of children and so on.

More than ever, they want government to step it up with family friendly policies on leave and childcare (59% compared to 49% in 2018) and they want to see employers be more understanding and offer flexible hours and part-time work (22%). As this large generation moves firmly into their parenting years, we can watch to see how their needs as parents the politics and policies of our country.

Data reference Q11: In general, do you feel that society does a good job of understanding and supporting mothers? Q12: In your opinion, what would have the biggest impact on the support of mothers?

METHODOLOGY STATEMENT. Motherly designed and administered this survey through Motherly's email subscriber list, social media and partner channels. This report focuses on the Millennial cohort of 3,920 respondents aged 23-38. The data were weighted to reflect the racial and ethnic composition of the US female millennial cohort based on US Census data. Edge Research weighted and analyzed the data, providing insights to trends and key findings.


[This post was originally published on May 3, 2019. It has been updated.]

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Creating your baby registry is one of the most exciting getting-ready-for-baby tasks a mama takes part in (other than, you know, growing a life). But even though sorting through adorably teeny this and itsy bitsy that can be loads of fun, that doesn't change the fact that there are SO many products from which to choose—not to mention slight variations in version for each. And how do parents know if you even need that *very specific* item to begin with, since each baby's likes are so different? It helps to have an expert guiding you through the what's-actually-worth-it process, whether it's veteran parents in your life who will likely offer up suggestions, or stores like buybuy BABY that handpick the must-have options and make registry building super easy for you.

From strollers to car seats and swings (because you'll definitely be needing a swing at some point), here are our top picks for first-time parents of the items you'll be glad you put on your baby registry, trust us.

UPPAbaby VISTA stroller

UPPAbaby VISTA stroller

The best recommendation is the one from someone you trust and if you ask around, it won't take long for you to learn that UPPAbaby® is one of the most beloved stroller brands by new and seasoned moms alike. The VISTA is their crème de la crème, and it comes with all sorts of high quality features (think an ultra-sturdy frame and all-wheel suspension to help absorb all those bumps on the road) that will keep your babe comfortable no matter where your walk takes you. Plus, it comes in a bunch of great colors and transitions to a double as your family grows.

$959.99

Chicco KeyFit 30 infant car seat

ChiccoKeyFitcarseat

When it comes to keeping your little one safe, a car seat is probably the most important piece of gear you'll buy. While you'll hopefully never need to test it out, the KeyFit® seat keeps your little peanut extra secure with things like side impact protection—plus, thanks to handy bubble indicators, installing it correctly doesn't require a rocket scientist[JS9] . It's all about making your life easier while helping you breathe easier, too!

$199.99

4moms mamaRoo classic infant seat

4momsmamaRooswing

All hail the infant swing 🙌. Whether your cute new bundle is generally calm or has more of a defiant streak, chances are there'll be a time when you need some hands-free soothing. Enter the mamaRoo, a beyond useful swing that looks as cozy as it is. Strap the nugget in, choose one of five distinct motion patterns, and let yourself enjoy that moment of solitude on the couch (without leaving baby unsupervised, of course).

$219.19

HALO Bassinest premier series swivel sleeper

HALOsleeper

Being a new mom is all about snuggles and, if we're being honest, surviving those sleepless nights. And since the American Association of Pediatrics' current recommendation is to have your baby sleep in your room for at least the first 6 months of life anyway, why not have your little one spend his or her early nights snoozing in a bedside bassinet to save some time in the middle of the night? The HALO Bassinest is designed to nuzzle right up next to your bed, too, so you won't even have to get out from under the comforter during those 3am feedings.

Graco Table2Table premier fold 7-in1 convertible high chair

Gracohighchair

Spoiler alert: Your little babe is going to grow up fast. While it may seem like they'll be in that just-learning-how-to-eat phase forever, they'll outgrow the full-fledged high chair in a blink. While you can definitely buy a variety of different seating apparatuses for them, you can also buy one that'll last with your growing baby. With seven different configurations ranging from an infant reclining high chair to a toddler table and little chair, this is the only one you'll ever need.

$169.99

Fisher-Price 4-in-1 sling 'n seat bath tub

Fisher-Pricebath

Bath time is arguably one of the cutest elements of parenthood. So rather than concentrating on holding your slippery little baby safely in the sink while also, you know, washing them, do yourself a favor and invest in an infant tub with an adjustable sling. It'll help make the bonding time fun of bath time more secure so you can focus on enjoying those beautiful sudsy moments.

$39.99

Hatch Baby Rest sound machine night light + time-to-rise

HatchBabyRestsoundmachine

Technology has brought us a lot of advantages, but one of the best? The ability to comfort your little one without ever leaving bed. The Hatch Baby Rest offers sound- and light-control from your smartphone so you can use the power of noise to help them back to sleep if they fuss in the middle of the night without requiring you to drag your tired self out of bed. Plus, when the toddler years come around, it doubles as a time-to-rise clock so that ball of energy knows when it's appropriate to barrel into your room.

$59.99

Fridababy baby basics kit

fridababybasics

Fridababy has made a name for itself with its cheeky (but incredibly practical) products like the congestion-fighting NoseFrida® and the less-than-pleasant Windi. With this basics bundle, you can get four of their most popular—for nose, behind, scalp and nails—in one convenient package. It's not glamorous, mamas, but it's parenting at its finest.

$39.99

Graco 4Ever all-in-one convertible car seat

Gracocarseat

Whether or not you choose to purchase an infant car seat for the first months, you will eventually need a convertible car seat as your kiddo gets bigger, and the best options will grow with them. The Graco® 4Ever All-in-1 accommodates children up to 40 pounds facing backwards and up to 65 pounds facing forward. Plus, it can be used as a booster seat up through the age of 10. One less thing to buy until then, mama!

Skip*Hop explore + more 3-stage activity center

SkipHopActivityCenter

Insider parenting tip: Invest in a few great toys that serve as a great way to help your baby learn and explore and stay safe (read: unable to crawl away when you turn your head for a split second). An activity center serves both of those purposes—keeps them entertained and contained fabulously. Even better, the SKIP*HOP® Explore & More 3-Stage has an extra-long shelf life as it converts to an activity table when they outgrow the harness. Plus, there's a snack bowl attachment, and as every mama knows, snacks mean victory.

$129.99

This article was sponsored by buybuy BABY. Thank you for supporting the brands that support mamas and Motherly.

Our Partners

There are less just two weeks left until the end of the month—and the decade. We're in shock here at Motherly and we're sure you are too. It feels like it just snuck up on us this year!

Well we're with you on the endless to-do list that usually pops up at this time of year (or, let's be honest—any time of year when you're a parent). It's a lot, but trust us when we say you've got this, mama.

If you've been missing the news this week while you run around trying to get everything done don't worry...we're keeping an eye on all the headlines you need to see.

Take a moment for yourself today and check out the headlines that are making us smile this week:

This mama edited her deployed husband into her Christmas card 

Danielle Cobo is a mama to twin boys and a proud military spouse. Her husband is currently serving overseas on a year-long deployment. He wasn't home for this year's Christmas card photo shoot, so Cobo's photographer, Shannon Sturgeon, did some photoshop magic to get the whole family in frame and the resulting picture is going viral.

"I am extremely proud of him and grateful for what he's doing because I think there's a purpose greater than our own," Cobo told Tampa NBC affiliate WFLA. "This year's deployment has been the toughest. By the time he returns, my husband will have missed half of our twins' lives. With that said, I wouldn't change a thing. I'm so proud of him."

When the card went viral, Cobo started getting messages from all over the United States from people who could relate to how she is feeling this holiday season. "I love the holidays," Cobo told WTVT. "I love Christmas cards. I save Christmas cards. It's just a way of showing people that though we are apart, we are a family."

Baby girl goes viral for adorable 'mean-mugging' photos 

Newborn photos are supposed to be adorable but this baby is looking adorably angry in hers. Baby Luna is taking over the internet thanks to the hilarious expression captured during her professional photoshoot.

"She's been mean-mugging since day one," Luna's dad Christian Musa told Good Morning America. "She's either mean-mugging non-stop, or just unimpressed."

Photographer Justine Tuhy says that while Luna (who was born November 15) was totally content during their photo session, "She just gave me the stare down the entire time as well."

This mom went viral for loving Christmas (and Wawa) too much

Mary Katherine Backstrom is the mom and writer behind MomBabble's website and social media accounts, and this week she went viral for the most hilarious reason.

Going live from her car in the parking lot of a Wawa gas station, Backstrom cry-laughed into her phone's camera as she explained how embarrassingly carried away with the holiday spirit she'd become. She was in the Wawa and saw the woman in line next to her only had a ginger ale, so she offered to pay for it to pay the Christmas spirit forward. Then, she came out of the gas station and saw a man washing her car's windshield.

"'This is my favorite part of humanity! I love Christmas so much, thank you for doing this,'" Backstrom recalls saying to the guy. "And I gave him a hug."

The problem? It wasn't her car. It was that dude's car. She just hugged and thanked him for cleaning his own car. 😂

She was so embarrassed that she just walked to her own car and pretended like nothing happened, then recorded her video and now the whole world knows about it.

Keep spreading the holiday magic Mary Katherine! You're hilarious.

Viral PSA reminds us to be kind to retail workers this time of year 

Whitney Fleming is the mom and writer behind "Playdates on Friday" and this week she's going viral for reminding the world to be nice to retail workers this time of year.

In a post that has been shared over 10,000 times, Fleming recalls a recent trip to Target. While chatting with her cashier she learned he'd had a pretty rough shift, as some moms who were stressed out during their Christmas shopping had taken it out on him.

"As the young man handed me my receipt, I handed over the gift card. 'Have a frappuccino on me. It's for dealing with all of us crazy, stressed-out moms.'

'Oh, no, ma'am. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything,' he stammered. You could see he was nervous about getting in trouble.

'No, I'm sorry, I told him. 'Have a great holiday.'"

Thanks for the reminder, Whitney.

Viral deal alert: Get a dozen Krispy Kremes for $1 today! 

Krispy Kreme is giving customers an early Christmas present this week.

If you're reading this on Thursday, December 12 you should swing by Krispy Kreme ASAP and get a dozen original glazed doughnuts for the low price of $1 when you buy a dozen specialty doughnuts.

They're practically giving the glazed doughnuts away at that price and the internet is going wild about this because the deal even applies when you buy the Instagram-worthy holiday-themed donuts!

So you can show up to work, school or the Christmas party with a dozen festive treats and still have 12 delicious original glazed doughnuts that you can keep for yourself!

This is happening in participating stores in the USA and ALL the stores in Canada.

News

At Motherly we know that mothers can and do balance business needs with the needs of their children every day. We do it every day, and we know that mothers at other companies are doing it every day, too—but this balancing act often isn't talked about.

This week a COO and father, Seth Morales, went viral for drawing attention to how hard his wife, and all working moms, work outside of regular business hours and outside offices.

Morales posted a photo of his wife comforting their child in a hospital bed, writing, "I took this picture of my wife and son this morning. Too often working moms don't get enough credit. I'm sharing this because I want people to know it's possible. You can be great at work and at home."

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He continues: "But sacrifices need to be made before/after normal working hours. The idea of working 40+ hours in the office isn't realistic. You'd be surprised at how productive my wife is from her smartphone while running errands. But she constantly thinks she's falling short with everything. Balancing life is messy and difficult. For all you working parents out there please have grace for yourself, it's a process."

Morales is right about many things: 40 hours of butt-in-seat office work is not realistic for many parents. Our kids have needs Monday through Friday, 9-5 that we need to be there for sometimes. Clearly, Morales' child was in need of medical attention and that's the kind of thing that parents need to be able to give their attention to, whether it happens during regular business hours or not. And Morales is also right that parents are making sacrifices, working before and after traditional office hours and making the most of small pockets of time. It sound like Morales' wife is multitasking a lot of time time, running her work from her "smartphone while running errands."

It's great that this powerful COO is sharing the struggles that working parents face and that a working mother's spouse is recognizing her efforts on a personal level. But we would challenge partners like Morales: If you see your partner trying so hard to do everything and feeling like she's never doing enough, perhaps it is time to ask yourself if YOU are doing enough.

Research shows that among heterosexual couples, women simply do more of the unpaid work of child-rearing than men do, and it hurts our careers, our families and our relationships (and that if men did just 50 minutes more labor at home every day we could close the gender gap.)

We would also challenge business leaders like Morales: If you see your employees are making the sacrifices that he mentions here, working before and after working hours and feeling like they are merely surviving, not thriving, maybe your culture needs to catch up with the needs of employees.

And finally, we challenge any working mother who "constantly thinks she's falling short with everything" to drop some balls and delegate at home. Get the store-bought muffins and share the load of managing your family load with your partner.

Morales is right, we can be great at work and at home, but not if we're not supported at work and at home.

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There's nothing Beyoncé can't do, at least as far as we can see. From dropping record-breaking albums to starring in movies to dominating stadium tours, the woman seems almost superhuman. But even Beyoncé can admit that working motherhood is really, really hard. She recently opened up about her struggles—and we never thought we'd say this—but we kind of feel like we can relate to Beyoncé.

The superstar recently opened up about everything from body image to hitting up Target in a brand new interview. But here's what we're taking away form the conversation: Beyoncé's raw, confessional comments about juggling motherhood and career.

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"I think the most stressful thing for me is balancing work and life," Beyoncé tells Elle when asked what stresses her out. "Making sure I am present for my kids—dropping Blue off at school, taking Rumi and Sir to their activities, making time for date nights with my husband, and being home in time to have dinner with my family—all while running a company can be challenging."

Say it louder, Beyoncé! It's crazy to hear that even the most iconic celebrity of all worries about things like school drop off. Admittedly, we don't know exactly what Bey's juggle looks like. We have no idea what it feels like to be trailed by the paparazzi or sell out stadiums or have access to absolutely everything money can buy. But here's what we do understand: The incredible pressure that comes with trying to fit too many things into too few hours, and the feeling that we wish we could be multiple places at once.

Something else we can relate to? Beyoncé's feelings about her body and its evolution over the years. "If someone told me 15 years ago that my body would go through so many changes and fluctuations, and that I would feel more womanly and secure with my curves, I would not have believed them," she says. "But children and maturity have taught me to value myself beyond my physical appearance and really understand that I am more than enough no matter what stage I'm at in life."

Amen to that, Mama!

And most relatable of all is this answer she provided. When a fan asked, "With all the hats you wear (chairwoman, global entertainer) and all the titles we give you (Queen, Yoncé), which brings you the greatest joy?" via email, here's what Queen B had to say: "Being Blue, Rumi, and Sir's mom."

We feel this so hard. And it's so gratifying to see that even Beyoncé—with all the massive, unprecedented things she's accomplished—knows that when it comes right down to it, nothing compares to being a mama.

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Sometimes it's hard for kids (and adults) to understand things that can't see. That's why some creative teachers are using bread to show kids just how germy their hands can get.

"We did a science project in class this last month as flu season was starting. We took fresh bread and touched it. We did one slice untouched. One with unwashed hands. One with hand sanitizer. One with washed hands with warm water and soap. Then we decided to rub a piece on all our classroom Chromebooks," teacher Jaralee Annice Metcalf writes in a now-viral Facebook post.

When the bread was left in sealed plastic bags the slices that had been exposed to more bacteria via laptops and unwashed hands grew the most mold.

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The bread that had been rubbed on those Chromebooks might be the grossest piece of bread we've ever seen, and really underscores Jaralee's point: "As somebody who is sick and tired of being sick and tired of being sick and tired. Wash your hands! Remind your kids to wash their hands! And hand sanitizer is not an alternative to washing hands!"

The CDC agrees with this elementary school teacher: Handwashing reduces the spread of diarrheal and respiratory illnesses (basically the bugs kids seem to be magnets for) so it's a good idea to teach kids to do it properly and often.

Jaralee isn't the first teacher to go viral for incorporating this experiment into her classroom and she probably won't be the last. Full instructions for this project are listed on the C.S. Mott Children's Hospital website and are easy to replicate at home.

Her Facebook post has been criticized by people questioning the conditions of her experiment, but as she notes on her Facebook page, they're kind of missing the point: "We are an elementary school. Not a fancy CDC lab, so relax a little and WASH YOUR HANDS."

It's good advice from a caring teacher and a reminder to wash our hands (and sanitize our laptops!)

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