13 ways to make weaning easier for you and your child

And once you’ve made it through, I am sending you a huge congratulatory high five.

13 ways to make weaning easier for you and your child

“Boobies?” she asked me while sitting across from me on Dada’s lap, in the rocking chair. I smiled and her dad continued to read.

We switched the bedtime routine for the very first time: dad was rocking and reading, mama was sitting on the ottoman watching. After the book was done, my daughter hugged and kissed us both, and to my total surprise, she happily went into her crib.

That. Was. That.

I was almost…hurt. The night before was our last time nursing. I didn’t get a photo, I didn’t live in every last moment, I didn’t get a cry in, and I didn’t glance down at my daughter suckling and say to myself This is the last time.


Two years and eight days of breastfeeding my baby exclusively and on-demand and it all came down to a simple and easy goodbye. I saved multiple weaning articles to read beforehand which I never got to. I cried each time I even THOUGHT about weaning. It broke my heart to take away something my daughter loved so much and I honestly felt like I couldn’t do it.

Knowing it was coming, days before the final night I was anxious and doubting myself, trying to forever remember the feeling of her on my breast and against my skin. In the end, the very slow weaning process we chose was really effective for us both.

She was more ready than I had thought; we both were.

There are many reasons mamas want to wean, or have to wean, and many ways to actually wean. The way I weaned does not mean it’s the only way, it was just the safest and best way for me and my family. Deciding when that is will be a very personal decision, left up to you and your baby.

I can tell you that: “…the United States Children’s Fund (UNICEF), the Word Health Organization (WHO), and the Canadian Paediatric Society all recommend breastfeeding for at least the first two years of life, and beyond for as long as mutually desired.”

If a baby is allowed to self-wean, meaning, until they naturally outgrow the need, independent of culture, they will do so somewhere between the age of 3-7! Early weaning will leave you without your best tool: nursing soothes, calms, helps to decreases pain and illnesses.

I chose to start our process when we found out we were expecting baby #2 and I knew that tandem feeding (breastfeeding both your older and younger kids) was not for me—though unless suggested by your OB or midwife due to preterm pregnancy symptoms or history, pregnancy does not mean you have to wean.

Regardless of your reason to wean, the most natural way is with a gradual spacing in between feeds and decreasing time at the breast. This minimizes the emotional effects on your baby and helps to ensure you do not get plugged ducts or mastitis.

The tips I am about to give you will be for weaning toddlers (about 18 months and older), who will best understand you, work with you in the weaning process, and can be reasoned with. I began my weaning process June 15th and my daughter was weaned by September 29th, a total of 15 weeks and 1 day. If you are weaning earlier, many of these tips will still apply, but most important, wean as gradually as possible.

1. Don’t offer, don’t refuse. Simple as that.

2. Set a goal.

Figure out when you’d like to be done. You may get there and change your mind and need more time, or be ready sooner. I chose to finish somewhere between 16 and 20 weeks pregnant, because breast milk turns back to colostrum around this time, and I wanted to give my daughter enough time to adjust before her new sibling came. Some babies like the new saltier flavor, others dislike it, but your supply significantly changes at this point.

3. Distract!

Try offering a snack, water, a favorite toy, or go into a different room.

4. Start to refuse some of the time.

Pick a few feedings you want to keep. I chose to continue my morning feed, naptime, and bedtime. These three made going to sleep easier, as breastfeeding helps babes fall asleep.

5. Negotiate and reason.

This can help your child feel like a part of the decision. For example, “We can’t nurse right now, because we only nurse in the morning when you wake, at naptime, and at bedtime. Remember?”

6. Talk to your baby about weaning.

Because your child can understand so much now, explain that you will be nursing less. Consider some good weaning books such as: Ready to Wean by Elyse April or Nursies When the Sun Shines: A little book on nightweaning by Katherine C Havener, or Mama, who drinks milk like me? by Melissa Panter.

7. Reduce feedings one at a time, over a few weeks to months, to get to one feeding a day.

I started by removing the morning feeding because it was the easiest transition for us. Instead of morning boob, my husband played with my daughter downstairs and fed her breakfast. She forgot about this feed after one day.

Next, we removed the nap time feeding by switching our routine. Instead of rocking her in the rocking chair and putting her in her crib, I put her in the stroller, walked outside, and calmly told her when she was upset to close her eyes, and it was time for a nap. After two to three days of fighting it, she became a champion stroller sleeper. We left the bedtime feeding for last.

8. Start decreasing the time spent at the breast.

Instead of letting my daughter feed from the start of the bedtime book, I told her she could nurse after daddy had finished reading. From there, I would say it was time to go to sleep faster and faster until she was only nursing for a couple of minutes.

9. Change your routine.

Start new rituals while you are still nursing so they feel normal when you’ve stopped, avoid the places where nursing normally occurs, and have your partner take a more active role in routines.

10. Giggle and smile when your babe asks for boob and make it sweet and silly.

“We can’t nurse silly girl! Mama has no more milk!”

11. Give reasons.

“Only babies have booby, not big girls like you.”

12. Cuddle, let your baby see, touch, snuggle and kiss your breasts.

Make plenty of time for giving your baby attention. They definitely will miss those warm booby snuggles and you will want and need to find new ways to be close and connect.

13. Take care of your breasts!

The slower this process is, the least amount of risk you have for plugged ducts and mastitis (infection in the breast). Your supply will slowly decrease as feeding decreases. If you are feeling very full at first, you should express just enough milk to get relief, leaving milk in the breast and triggering your brain to slow down production. Use ice packs and take ibuprofen to reduce swelling and discomfort.

Weaning is the end to an incredibly unique relationship you share with your child. There is no reason to stop before you and your baby are ready, and the longer you share in this breastfeeding journey, the better it is for you and your LO.

By weaning your baby when he is ready, you will have met his physical and emotional needs, in the most normal and healthy way. Even when weaning, the milk’s protective factors “increase in importance and proportion to total fluid volume” so your baby stays protected all the way to the end.

Whatever your baby’s age, weaning is a huge change and absolutely okay for both of you to mourn. When the time is right for you, try to remember to go slow and steady, do it safely and with love. Have some tissues, and have a camera ready for that last day of beautiful cuddly suckling so you don’t miss it like I did.

And once you’ve made it through, I am sending you a huge congratulatory high five.

*It is recommended not to introduce cows milk until your child reaches 1 year, so if you are weaning anytime before the year mark, slowly introducing/replacing with formula will be part of your weaning process.

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    14 Toys that will keep your kids entertained inside *and* outside

    They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

    With Labor day weekend in the rearview and back-to-school in full swing, most parents are fresh out of boxes to check on their "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in summer-only toys. So with that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play. Even better, they're Montessori-friendly and largely open-ended so your kids can get a ton of use out of them.

    From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

    Wooden doll stroller

    Janod wooden doll strollerWooden Doll Stroller

    Take their charges on a stroll around the block with this classic doll stroller. With the same versatility they're used to in their own ride, this heirloom quality carriage allows their doll or stuffy to face them or face the world.


    Detective set

    Plan Toys detective setDetective Set

    This set has everything your little detective needs to solve whatever mystery they might encounter: an eye glasses, walkie-talkie, camera, a red lens, a periscope and a bag. Neighborhood watch? Watch out.


    Sand play set

    Plan Toys sand set

    Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.


    Water play set

    Plan Toys water play set

    Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.


    Mini golf set

    Plan Toys mini golf set

    Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.


    Vintage scooter balance bike

    Janod retro scooter balance bike

    Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.


    Wooden rocking pegasus

    plan toys wooden rocking pegasus

    Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.


    Croquet set

    Plan Toys croquet set

    The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.


    Wooden digital camera

    fathers factory wooden digital camera

    Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.


    Wooden bulldozer toy

    plan toys wooden bulldozer toy

    Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.


    Pull-along hippo

    janod toys pull along hippo toy

    There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.


    Baby forest fox ride-on

    janod toys baby fox ride on

    Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.


    Balance board

    Plan Toys balance board

    Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!


    Meadow ring toss game

    Plan Toys meadow ring toss game

    Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.


    We independently select and share the products we love—and may receive a commission if you choose to buy. You've got this.


    Tips parents need to know about poor air quality and caring for kids with asthma

    There are steps parents can take to keep their children as healthy as possible.

    When wildfires struck the West Coast in September 2020, there was a lot for parents to worry about. For parents of children with asthma, though, the danger could be even greater. "There are more than 400 toxins that are present in wildfire smoke. That can activate the immune system in ways that aren't helpful by both causing an inflammatory response and distracting the immune system from fighting infection," says Amy Oro, MD, a pediatrician at Stanford Children's Health. "When smoke enters into the lungs, it causes irritation and muscle spasms of the smooth muscle that is around the small breathing tubes in the lungs. This can lead to difficulty with breathing and wheezing. It's really difficult on the lungs."

    With the added concern of COVID-19 and the effect it can have on breathing, many parents feel unsure about how to keep their children protected. The good news is that there are steps parents can take to keep their children as healthy as possible.

    Here are tips parents need to know about how to deal with poor air quality when your child has asthma.

    Minimize smoke exposure.

    Especially when the air quality index reaches dangerous levels, it's best to stay indoors as much as possible. You can find out your area's AQI at An under 50 rating is the safest, but between 100-150 is considered unhealthy for sensitive groups, such as children with asthma. "If you're being told to stay indoors, listen. If you can, keep the windows and doors closed," Oro says.

    Do your best to filter the air.

    According to Oro, a HEPA filter is your best bet to effectively clean pollutants from the air. Many homes are equipped with a built-in HEPA filter in their air conditioning systems, but you can also get a canister filter. Oro says her family (her husband and children all suffer from asthma) also made use of a hack from the New York Times and built their own filter by duct taping a HEPA furnace filter to the front of a box fan. "It was pretty disgusting what we accumulated in the first 20 hours in our fan," she says.

    Avoid letting your child play outside or overly exert themselves in open air.

    "Unfortunately, cloth masks don't do very much [to protect you from the smoke pollution]," Oro says. "You really need an N95 mask, and most of those have been allocated toward essential workers." To keep at-risk children safer, Oro recommends avoiding brisk exercise outdoors. Instead, set up an indoor obstacle course or challenge your family to jumping jacks periodically to keep everyone moving safely.

    Know the difference between smoke exposure and COVID-19.

    "COVID-19 can have a lot of the same symptoms—dry cough, sore throat, shortness of breath and chest pain could overlap. But what COVID and other viruses generally cause are fever, chills, vomiting, diarrhea and body aches. Those would tell you it's not just smoke exposure," Oro says. When a child has been exposed to smoke, they often complain of a "scrape" in their throat, burning eyes, cough, shortness of breath, chest pain or wheezing. If the child has asthma, parents should watch for a flare of symptoms, such as coughing, wheezing or a tight sensation in their chest.

    Unfortunately, not much is known about long-term exposure to wildfire smoke on a healthy or compromised immune system, but elevated levels of air pollution have been associated with increased COVID-19 rates. That's because whenever there's an issue with your immune system, it distracts your immune system from fighting infections and you have a harder time fighting off viruses. Limiting your exposure to wildfire smoke is your best bet to keep immune systems strong.

    Have a plan in place if you think your child is suffering from smoke exposure.

    Whatever type of medication your child takes for asthma, make sure you have it on-hand and that your child is keeping up with regular doses. Contact your child's pediatrician, especially if your area has a hazardous air quality—they may want to adjust your child's medication schedule or dosage to prevent an attack. Oro also recommends that, if your child has asthma, it might be helpful to have a stethoscope or even a pulse oximeter at home to help diagnose issues with your pediatrician through telehealth.

    Most importantly, don't panic.

    In some cases, social distancing and distance learning due to COVID may be helping to keep sensitive groups like children with asthma safer. Oro says wildfires in past years have generally resulted in more ER visits for children, but the most recent fires haven't seen the same results. "A lot of what we've seen is that the smoke really adversely affects adults, especially older adults over 65," Oro says. "Children tend to be really resilient."

    This article was sponsored by Stanford Children's Health. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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