Sex secrets from hot mama behind the Museum of Sex

Including one sexy thing you can do for your partner today and Sarah’s best tips for tired, busy parents. 

Sex secrets from hot mama behind  the Museum of Sex

For much of the past decade, Sarah Forbes served as the Curator of the Museum of Sex in NYC, honing a technique of making sex smart, educational and socially responsible.

A married mama of two she's covered topics like how she talks to her children about sex and what babymaking sex is like as our Motherly expert.

Sarah has put together impressive (and super interesting!) exhibits for the museum ranging from the sex lives of animals to exploring why we like what we like—by analyzing internet searches ?..

Her latest adventure? Writing a memoir detailing her journey from graduate school student to sexpert entitled, “Sex in the Museum: My Unlikely Career At New York's Most Provocative Museum".

We got to chat with Sarah about all things S-E-X including one sexy thing you can do for your partner today and her best tips for tired, busy parents. ?

Why was it important for you to write this book?

SARAH FORBES: After almost twelve years working at the Museum of Sex I had so much information I wanted to share beyond the Museum's walls. A book felt like an incredible opportunity to teach, but also let people get a sense of who I am and how this surreal adventure shaped and impacted my life. I hope readers will find both education and entertainment in its pages. There will be moments of shock and moments of laughter. It really has been a once in a lifetime experience!

How has sex changed for you throughout your journey of motherhood?

SARAH FORBES: While sex and sexuality has been my professional field, it has taken on a whole new meaning for me now that I'm a mother.

I understand the topic in a whole new way.

I've had the kind of sex that defined my single days, the sex with the intention of getting pregnant, the kind of sex when you aren't getting pregnant, anti-acrobatic awkward pregnant sex, new parent exhausted sex and now, as I think our family is complete with our two children, the kind of sex that is about staying emotionally and physically connected to the man I plan on spending the rest of my life with.

How you will talk to your children about sex? When?

SARAH FORBES: The building blocks of a positive relationship with sex are feeling confident, comfortable and empowered in your own body.

For children I feel even more passionately about this foundation as a means of keeping them safe from predators. For this reason, from day one I have been using the real names for body parts. Yes, we say “penis" and “vagina" in the same tone of voice as arm, leg and other words we teach our children about their bodies without giggling.

We talk about who and who isn't allowed to touch their bodies. We talk about how special their bodies are as well as where and when it is appropriate to touch those special parts of their bodies.

While my two year old is more interested in proudly exclaiming she has a vagina and her brother has a penis (or asserting “Grandma Penis" which does make me smile for how uncomfortable it makes my mom), my four year old son has recently started to ask about where babies come from. For now the answers are basic, increasing in detail as he matures and is able to understand.

Being age appropriate is key. Facts work best.

My goal is that when my kids are adults they won't think back to that one time they had the sex talk, they will have been getting the building blocks since the very beginning.

A photo posted by Sarah Forbes (@curatorofsex) on

What are your three best sex tips for busy, tired parents?


1. Don't always feel pressured to have intercourse.

Touching your partner, kissing your partner or engaging in other acts can go a long way toward bonding and letting the other know you are still attracted to them.

2. Nothing wrong with a quickie.

3. While all forms of relationships exist, for many “sex" is an act that makes your relationship with your partner different from any other.

Nurture and prioritize this unique aspect of your relationship. Shortly after I got engaged my grandmother felt it was her duty to call me and say: “sex is very important in a marriage." Only now, two kids later, more stressed and exhausted than I've ever been do I really understand how on point her statement was.

What's one sexy thing you could do for your partner today when you see them?

SARAH FORBES: Maybe it's just me, but letting me know I'm appreciated goes a long way. Each person is different, the gesture doesn't need to be big, just something that reminds them how special they are to you in a way that is meaningful to them.

How can you keep sex spontaneous and exciting after being together for so long?

SARAH FORBES: For me, the best thing to keep a relationship sexually exciting actually has nothing to do with introducing new sexual techniques and props (though I think these can be fun if everyone is on board), but rather has more has to do with mindset. More than arousing genitals, arousing each other's brains can bring a relationship to a new space.

Particularly in long term relationships, when conversations about the kids and things that “need to get done" dominate, we often forget to actually get to know the new grown ups each of you have become.

Communication is critical. It's much easier to be spontaneous when you are feeling connected to your partner.

Why do you want people to buy your book, and what do you hope they get out of it?

SARAH FORBES: I think we all (even me) can learn more about the ever-fascinating topic of sex. While working as the Curator of the Museum of Sex made my circumstances unique, I think readers will appreciate and relate to the fact that “Sex in the Museum: My Unlikely Career at New York's Most Provocative Museum" is also the story of a young woman transitioning from a young twenty something just starting out, to a young woman single in a big city, to a wife and eventually a mother.

Many of us know that adventure well, but here it all happened with the Museum of Sex in the background. Purposefully written to be an accessible and fun read, I think moms in particular will appreciate how “snackable" the book is, and I hope, will be the book on your nightstand you actually finish cover to cover. As a mom myself, it's a huge accomplishment.

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We're so glad to live in a time when modern baby gear exists. Sure, no one is going to argue that having a baby is easy—but it can be easier with support from some gadgets designed to help your baby and put your mind at ease.

As you build your baby registry, look for products that go the extra mile to make your life a whole lot easier. For example, what's better than a bassinet? A bassinet that can rock by itself. And what's better than a traditional baby monitor? One that allows you to actually take a peek at your baby. Believe us when we say these upgrades can make all the difference.

Here are 10 baby gadgets that will make your life so much easier… relatively speaking, of course!

A bassinet to promote safe + sound sleep

HALO Innovations Bassinest Swivel Sleeper Essenta Series Nautical Net

The safest place for your newborn to sleep is in your room, but not in your bed. Thanks to the swivel function of the Halo Bassinest, you can easily tend to your baby during the night—which means more sleep for you, too. Trust us when we say that is the best gift you can give a new parent.


A smart swing for your baby

4moms mamaRoo 4 Bluetooth Enabled High-Tech Baby Swing - Classic

Believe it or not, many babies are born with strong opinions about how they want to be rocked, swung or shushed to calm down. With the mamaRoo's various motions and reclining positions, you'll be able to find a setting your baby loves when you need to free up your hands for a bit.


A complete travel system for car + sidewalk

Chicco Bravo Travel System - Indigo

No matter where the day takes you—or what mode of transportation you need to get there—getting a complete travel system for your baby will equip you for anything.


A swaddle you don’t have to wrestle

Love To Dream Swaddle UP Original

What do babies and Harry Houdini have in common? A knack for breaking out of tight constraints—which can be a headache when swaddling is the best way to help promote good sleep. Thanks to a breakout-proof swaddle that allows your baby to sleep with their hands up, you don't have to work up a sweat just to get your baby comfortably swaddled.


A nursery wherever you need it

Baby Trend Lil Snooze Deluxe II Nursery Center

During the early days of parenting (when you are feeding and changing your baby around the clock), having convenient access to everything you need with a go-anywhere nursery station can save you serious time and energy.


A little help for stuffy noses

Fridababy NoseFrida Nasal Aspirator

Up until the point years down the road when your child is able to blow their own nose, the sniffles can be a real struggle—but not with a nasal aspirator that makes it easy for you to get that snot out of their nose.


A way to keep an eye on your baby

VTech 5" Digital Video Baby Monitor - VM5251

Trust us when we say you'll sleep better when you know your baby is also sleeping soundly. That's why we're so thankful for modern-day video monitors, which allow you to check in on your sleeping baby without running the risk of waking them up when you sneak in for a peek.


A bassinet for hands-free rocking

Simmons Kids Silent Auto Gliding Elite Bassinet - Odyssey

Babies are soothed by rocking motions. But what does that mean for you if you can't rock them throughout the night? With an auto-gliding bassinet, they can comfortably drift off to sleep... and continue snoozing.


An easy way to contain diaper smells

Diaper Genie Expressions Pail

Sometimes it's the little conveniences that make a big difference in the quality of your day-to-day life. That's why a great diaper pail should not be undervalued: By containing the smell, you will save yourself dozens upon dozens of trips to the garbage can.


A white noise machine that pulls double duty

Hatch Rest Sound Machine, Night Light & Time-to-Rise

A phone-controlled sound machine may be something you never considered until now, but it will be a major lifesaver for years to come, especially as it can also function as a time-to-rise clock that promotes good sleep habits for your child.


And as for securing all these awesome products? Well, a Target baby registry is the way to do it. By creating your baby registry with Target, you will also enjoy their Year of Benefits registry program, which includes perks like a welcome kit with more than $100 in savings and samples, two 15% off coupons to complete your registry, and a full year of returns. The benefits are better than ever right now: Target just launched the Year of Exclusive Deals perk as one of its registry benefits, and this includes a year's worth of discounts on baby essentials (think diapers and formula) and comes complementary when you sign up for Target Circle.

Because while parenting may not be "easy," deciding to register with Target definitely is an easy decision. Start your Target baby registry now and enjoy shopping with a Year of Benefits featuring a Year of Exclusive Deals available via Target Circle, two 15% off coupons, a year of hassle-free returns, a free welcome kit and more!

This article was sponsored by Target. Thank you for supporting the brands that support Motherly and mamas.

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14 outdoor toys your kids will want to play with beyond summer

They transition seamlessly for indoor play.

With Labor day weekend in the rearview and back-to-school in full swing, most parents are fresh out of boxes to check on their "Fun Concierge" hit list. It's also the point of diminishing returns on investing in summer-only toys. So with that in mind, we've rounded up some of our favorite toys that are not only built to last but will easily make the transition from outdoor to indoor play. Even better, they're Montessori-friendly and largely open-ended so your kids can get a ton of use out of them.

From sunny backyard afternoons to rainy mornings stuck inside, these toys are sure to keep little ones engaged and entertained.

Meadow ring toss game

Plan Toys meadow ring toss game

Besides offering a fantastic opportunity to hone focus, coordination, determination and taking turns, lawn games are just plain fun. Set them up close together for the littles and spread them out when Mom and Dad get in on the action. With their low profile and rope rings, they're great for indoors as well.


Balance board

Plan Toys balance board

Balance boards are a fabulous way to get the wiggles out. This one comes with a rope attachment, making it suitable for even the youngest wigglers. From practicing their balance and building core strength to working on skills that translate to skateboarding and snowboarding, it's a year-round physical activity that's easy to bring inside and use between Zoom classes, too!


Detective set

Plan Toys detective setDetective Set

This set has everything your little detective needs to solve whatever mystery they might encounter: an eye glasses, walkie-talkie, camera, a red lens, a periscope and a bag. Neighborhood watch? Watch out.


Wooden doll stroller

Janod wooden doll strollerWooden Doll Stroller

Take their charges on a stroll around the block with this classic doll stroller. With the same versatility they're used to in their own ride, this heirloom quality carriage allows their doll or stuffy to face them or face the world.


Sand play set

Plan Toys sand set

Whether you're hitting the beach or the backyard sandbox, this adorable wooden sand set is ready for action. Each scoop has an embossed pattern that's perfect for sand stamping. They're also totally suitable for water play in the wild or the bathtub.


Water play set

Plan Toys water play set

Filled with sand or water, this tabletop sized activity set keeps little ones busy, quiet and happy. (A mama's ideal trifecta 😉). It's big enough to satisfy their play needs but not so big it's going to flood your floors if you bring the fun inside on a rainy day.


Mini golf set

Plan Toys mini golf set

Fore! This mini golf set is lawn and living room ready. Set up a backyard competition or incorporate into homeschooling brain breaks that shift focus and build concentration.


Vintage scooter balance bike

Janod retro scooter balance bike

Pedals are so 2010. Balance bikes are the way to go for learning to ride a bike while skipping the training wheels stage altogether. This impossibly cool retro scooter-style is built to cruise the neighborhood or open indoor space as they're learning.


Wooden rocking pegasus

plan toys wooden rocking pegasus

Your little will be ready to take flight on this fun pegasus. It gently rocks back and forth, but doesn't skimp on safety—its winged saddle, footrests and backrest ensure kids won't fall off whether they're rocking inside or outside.


Croquet set

Plan Toys croquet set

The cutest croquet set we've ever seen! With adorable animal face wooden balls and a canvas bag for easy clean up, it's also crafted to stick around awhile. Round after round, it's great for teaching kiddos math and problem-solving skills as well.


Wooden digital camera

fathers factory wooden digital camera

Kids get the chance to assemble the camera on their own then can adventure anywhere to capture the best moments. With two detachable magnetic lenses, four built-in filters and video recorder, your little photographer can tap into their creativity from summertime to the holidays.


Wooden bulldozer toy

plan toys wooden bulldozer toy

Whether they're digging up sand in the backyad or picking up toys inside, kids can get as creative as they want picking up and moving things around. Even better? Its wooden structure means it's not an eye sore to look at wherever your digger drops it.


Pull-along hippo

janod toys pull along hippo toy

There's just something so fun about a classic pull-along toy and we love that they seamlessly transition between indoor and outdoor play. Crafted from solid cherry and beechwood, it's tough enough to endure outdoor spaces your toddler takes it on.


Baby forest fox ride-on

janod toys baby fox ride on

Toddlers will love zooming around on this fox ride-on, and it's a great transition toy into traditional balance bikes. If you take it for a driveway adventure, simply use a damp cloth to wipe down the wheels before bringing back inside.


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Bethany Menzel: Instagram + Blog

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