Marriage is equal parts the merging of two lives and the merging of two families, two pasts, two different childhoods, too.
It’s equal parts a dreamland where you get to watch your partner hold your newborn baby for the first time and equals parts regular, everyday life where we get annoyed at each other for losing the remote because the deeper issue at hand is that we got a combined four hours of sleep last night because of aforementioned newborn child and we’re both exhausted.
It’s equal parts amazing and hard work.
It’s also equal parts hilarious and well, real.
Marriage is equal parts…
Hearing, “You are the most beautiful woman in the world.” AND “Did your hair clog up the shower again?!”
Saying, “Thank you so much for folding all this laundry! You are the best.” AND “I don’t understand why you can’t shut the cabinets after you’re done with something…”
Saying, “I really couldn’t do this without you. Thank goodness we’re in this together.” AND “Can you PLEASE stop chewing like THAT?”
Thinking, There’s no man sexier than mine and also, Wow, I truly don’t understand how his feet could smell this bad. I hope he is okay…
Saying, “You are so helpful! I love you!” And thinking to yourself, I wish someone else would think of all the million to-do’s in my head.
Saying, “Let’s go away without the kids! Just us.” AND “Do you really think we could do it? I think we’d miss them. Maybe it’s too much. We can do it in a few years.”
Looking at each other during the madness of that pre-bedtime hour while your kids run around like maniacs and you’re smiling so big because this life makes you both so very happy. AND looking at each other during the madness of that pre-bedtime hour while your kids run around like maniacs and you’re both near tears because you’re equally exhausted and no one is listening and you just want them to go to sleep.
Getting really excited for a date night together because…finally! AND not exactly dreading date night, but not exactly mustering up enough energy and enthusiasm to get showered and dressed and out the door either.
Being on the same page about something as simple as watching five episodes of The Office before bed AND not being on the same page about something so simple as what brand of peanut butter you should buy.
Not agreeing on One. Single. Movie. out of the millions of movies available to rent but definitely agreeing on the fact that Emily Blunt and John Krasinski would play the movie version of you guys if they should ever feel so inclined…
Saying, “Can you please rock her to sleep? I feel like I was just up with her,” AND waking up saying, “Oh my goodness! I slept through the night! Did everyone sleep through the night?” Only to hear about their night. They got up with each kid at least once but wanted you to be able to rest, so didn’t wake you.
Saying, “Okay let’s divide and conquer. You change the pee sheets. I’ll wash her off and get her new jams,” AND begging one person to please just take care of it and you’ll do it next time.
Hearing your partner say, “I don’t know how you do it all! You’re amazing.” AND “HOW IN THE WORLD IS YOUR CAR THIS MESSY?!”
Thinking, Man I really lucked out with him. Look at him dancing with the girls in that tutu! AND then If this roughhousing episode ends in an ER visit, I am NOT going to be happy.
Giving him that ‘knowing look’ when it’s time time make some magic. AND also when you’re ‘knowing look’ means to cut the crap.
Marriage is equal parts fun and hard work and inspiration and teamwork and compromise. But it’s always 100% love.