I never could have imagined the energy that I felt with you inside me. I anticipated weakness, illness and slower days. Those came but were far and few between. Instead, what was most present during this pregnancy was my creativity.
To my daughter,
Even before you were born, you inspired me. During the first weeks of my pregnancy, I knew the enormous effort you were making—rapidly growing, building every muscle, organ and bone. It might sound silly, but I could feel your energy circulating through me—and it was both calming and reassuring.
And thus, we began a daily dialogue; one without words.
My mother gave me the name 'Bliss' as an ever-present reminder to find joy in hidden places. And—when joined with you—I instantaneously felt a new essence that was bright and palpable. It emanated a feeling that I wanted to bottle up forever, to one day share with you.
I wondered if that moment, that feeling, was felt by every future mother so I decided that those nine months—or, rather, 10 in your case—was enough time to create a collection of jewelry to capture that feeling and dedicate it to you.
I never could have imagined the energy that I felt with you inside me. I anticipated weakness, illness and slower days. Those came but were far and few between. Instead, what was most present during this pregnancy was my creativity. You, my darling, were enigmatic in the power you had. For something so small, so dependent, it was on you that I felt reliant. You were a source for me throughout those months.
When designing before you, my process was twofold. It was introspective: I would search within myself—pose questions—to find inspiration. First, for my visual inspiration, and then again to pinpoint the feel I wished to infuse into each design. Armed with those two elements, I would then begin to sketch.
With you, though, inspiration arrived in a visceral, tangible form. I no longer needed to search for it.
The shift happened rather abruptly. One day, in our first trimester, I was walking around New York City and a stranger commented that I was smiling. There I was, incognito, walking through the city, moving with a beautiful secret only my nearest knew.
You were on your way and the world was about to feel full, the light more bright. This moment of anticipation and excitement eventually became a state of being. I wanted to remember the feeling forever.
During our second trimester, there's no better way to describe it other than having felt like a warrior. It was inner strength and vibrancy like I had never known before. Throughout those weeks and months, creativity blossomed, work flowed, conversations inspired and life seemed wholly in place.
And then, during the third trimester throughout a balmy August in New York City, your weight barely slowed us down. Up until your arrival, on the eleventh of September in the late afternoon, I worked diligently to put the pieces into place for this new commemorative collection—in which, one day, I hope you'll have so much pride.
For you, my baby, I made a gold necklace with a delicately carved half-moon pendant made of crystal quartz. I named that piece Brevity, as it was meant to represent the fleeting moment of time when we were sharing the same energy as one being.
Meticulously designed so that the stone—which is, by nature, energy neutralizing and a representation of clarity, intention, and connection—would rest upon the skin, my skin, our skin, and absorb our shared energy. A tiny keepsake of this precious time together.
I wore that necklace every day of my pregnancy with you, and while giving birth.
As I write this today, we are now two, and the tables have turned. Now, it is me who is excited to try to inspire you. We live in a world of firsts together, each new experience an opportunity to show you beauty, activate your senses, spark your curiosity and encourage your own ideas.
In your new life outside, our entire world has shifted. A new world has emerged, one where minutes are experienced with heightened clarity and sunsets represent an evolution that I could never have imagined. Shadows and light which always inspired me, are fascinating to you which then motivates me to view shapes and contrast anew. In daydreaming of what is happening inside your eyes, I have now come to a new place of inspiration.
It leaves me wondering if we'll continue our conversation without words forever.
I'm excited to find out.